(The flashback)
"Rence? Clarence?!" Trixie asked worriedly with a shaky voice along with the tears that keep on falling, this pain and fear are very familiar.
"Ahhhhh! my headdddd!" Clarence cried because of the pain he felt from his head. Trixie came over but he pushed her heavily, he didn't mean to hurt her wife but Clarence is out of his self-control, he is crying like a child but his wife cannot comfort him. Trixie is crying because of fear, she knew for sure that her husband needs help.
Clarence heard his wife crying in the corner, she is afraid. "Trixie? Are you alright ?! I didn't mean to hurt you I'm s-sorry." He said. Controlling himself is not possible because of a severe headache but the most painful part is that he makes his wife cry he notices that Trixie is crying heavily because of fear.
*sob *sob *sob *sob *sob *sob "Rence I know you're having a hard time. But let me help you, I'm your wife and I don't want to see you in that situation, let's go to the hospital please." She said calmly while trying to hold her tears.
"Ahhhhhh! I can't take it anymore." Clarence shouted while writhing in pain. He just held his head. Trixie tried to be brave despite all the fear and ran closer to him she called his name repeatedly while Trixie hugged him so tight.
Clarence couldn't answer and deal with his headache again, after a minute Clarence finally collapsed.
"Clarence! Clarence!." Trixie quickly called the doctor to take her to the hospital but in the meantime, the private doctor go to their house to give him first aid.
Finally Dim came to help Trixie "Rence?! rence?" Dim called his name to check if he was with them but he did not respond.
"It's okay Rence, the doctors are coming." Trixie cried while holding her husband.
The private doctor came quickly for Rence and there he was examined. He was given a painkiller and put to sleep.
"It would be better if you take him to the hospital so we can give him proper medication and examination about his situation. For now, I'm sure the constant headache is because of the accident before." the doctor said.
Trixie becomes more afraid of what the doctor said because of the trauma when her sister Trisha died. (Riddle's mother) She is afraid to lose his husband this time.
Dim came over and hugged Trixie for comfort, he didn't know what to do so he just gave her a hug for a warm hug. Dim witnessed all the pain, fear, and courage during the battle of her sister before Trisha died and obviously Dim knows the pain of losing someone you love.
"Dim why? why is this happening again to me? Trisha is already dead and he's the only one left for me. Am I bad? Dim am I bad?!" She asked with eyes full of tears.
"Clarence will be fine. Calm yourself Trixie." He replies.
"What else? Who else will I lose huh?!" Trixie sighed angrily with the flow of every tear in her eyes. This scene is not new but the pain is double this time as she experiences being afraid again. But one thing is for sure, she knows that Clarence did not want to make her cry and his husband is fighting his illness to stay with Trixie.
Clarence was quickly transferred to the hospital for treatment. But unfortunately, he ended up in a comatose state due to the gradual worsening of his illness due to the accident when Trisha was still alive.
7 years ago, Trixie and Clarence had an accident. Clarence was put in the most difficult situation of his life because he in comatose, but Clarence was brave and fight for his life. From the comatose, he came to life and regained his former vigor and continue his life with Trixie, But what he didn't know was that Clarence did not recover completely and it got worse after a year. Clarence's skull was damaged and there were complications due to negligence and lack of medical check-ups. He did not bear the constant headache so that his wife would not have to worry, but the infections spread quickly and that's where the severe headache came. His worsening condition makes him violent sometimes and makes him forgetful.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-Trixie Sebastian Ford Point of View-
"Rence? Are you okay? Do you still know me? I'm Trixie your wife." She is talking to her comatose husband in eyes full of tears, her husband doesn't seem to hear her but she keep on talking to him.
"He can no longer move or speak, he can't say that he loves me because of the infection spread to his brain, But I believe that his heart are still fighting." I said to myself.
After a minute I saw a tears from my husband's eye. He was crying then I smile. It seems like he heard my voice and he wanted to comfort me but he can't.
I wiped the tears from his eyes. Then I hugged him. "Clarence thank you, thank you for not giving up to me. You take a good care of me when we are young and you marry me even I have nothing to give you. Please fight okay? Fight for me, don't follow Trisha in heaven. I can't stand it Clarence. I can't."
I don't know what I'm going to do, Trisha is gone do Clarence will be gone too? I want to curse heaven but I can't because I know he has a plan. My faith and trust in the Lord are still strong.
I was about to leave when I heard a device sound. I took a quick look at it then I saw a straight line at it. I stop for a moment my body got freeze. This can't be. I quickly call his name repeatedly and the tears began to fall.
"Doc?! Doccc!? Doctor please! Nurse? Nurseeee!" I cried as I hugged Clarence. I even saw the tears at the corner of his eyes I was scared. I don't want to, I can't accept, I won't accept. Not now please! the pain is still fresh of the loss of my sister, I was not yet ready to be alone again.
"Clarence don't! Don't please." I lost my strength with fear of losing him again. Losing him seemed unbearable I hug him tight I feel his cold body but I'm sure he is fighting and he wanted to comfort me. After a few second the doctor and nurse came to check him.
"Help him please, he is fighting I know he is." I said softly as I watched him on his bed.
This moment I realized the hardest part of life, it when someone is about to leave but you are not yet ready to be left behind, the only thing you can do is to cry, beg and please the heaven to extend their time, but guess what your pain and fear of being left behind is not enough reason for them to stay. Because everyone has it's own time.
I was on the side while the doctor are checking him, I can see that they are doing their best but nothing happens the straight line doesn't change. My husband did not response his skin change it's color into pale.
After a long minute the doctor stop from reviving him, I was still standing with my shaky knees and blank emotion I can speak and no words came out of my mouth but i know for sure the doctor is saying something but I can't hear it.
"Time of death. 2:11 pm, I'm so sorry he gave up, those tears in his eyes are the signs again I'm so sorry but we did our best." doctor announces then left. I remember that the doctor tapped my shoulder and tries to wait for my answer but it seems like I did not understand any of his words.
I sat down on the floor now I feel that I'm very tired for so long. After a minute no one left in this room aside from me and my husband. He is pale but it seems like he is just sleeping peacefully.
"How can you sleep peacefully when I'm crying, when I'm in pain huh?" I asked him calmly knowing that he will not answer me anymore.
I remained sitting on the floor. Not moving and not crying, it's just the pain hugging me tight this is painful, very painful. Am I going crazy? I want to pretend that everything is just a dream and one day I will wake up happily with my husband saying how much I love him.
I look around, the room is empty and very silent then I saw my hand wearing a beautiful ring the witness of our love and a promise to love him in sickness and in health. "till death?"..... I said with very tiny voice. Finally I manage to say I word this time.
Losing him for the second time is the worst feeling. "Trixie? Dim called softly and guide me to stand up. He fix my messy hair, he wipe my face and tapped my shoulder. He was with jade our friend. Finally a reunion.
"Guys can you help me to wake him up, I missed his voice." I said while looking to my husband.
"Trixie stop." Jade answer.
"I want to go home with him." I said softly.
Dim hug me, at this point no one tries to speak and the room started to embrace the silence.
I turned to Clarence who was lying on the bed and seemed to be resting. I had seen Trisha in this position before, in the same situation. Lying on a bed while blindfolded seemed to be resting.
"Jade? Let's wake him up? I want to go home I'm tired." I know that seems out of place but that's what I want.
"Trixie I'll take you home, Please rest first." He answered.
"No, I don't want to, I ran closer to Clarence then I hugged him. "Rence? wake up, you don't want to hurt me right? Clarence don't leave me." I begged the lifeless Clarence.
Signs? I saw the signs but why I did not notice that he is dealing with infections? the changes of moods, headache and forgetting small things everyday is the sign. Why I didn't notice that he was sick? I remember when Trisha are still alive he always forgot the dates, my name, and our address.
"Did you know about your illness aren't you?! I asked my husband.
"You know about your condition yet you did not tell me?" I said with anger and guilt.
"Trixie that's enough." Jade reply.
"You keep this as a secret am I right? How could you hide this to me Clarence?! I deserve to know your condition rence, I'm your wife right?!" Jade held me and hugged me.
"I know he fight, can't you see those apparatus? every medicine hurts his weak body you are not the only person whose in pain Trixie, we lost him." Dim said.
"Jade I want him, please I want my husband." I answered then I cried.
No one answered me, they are just looking at Clarence body. I always lose now, I have nothing else to lose. Surely I'm not the only person whose terrified of losing people but 2 consecutive time? why?!
I'm starting to build my walls so no one can enter my life again after losing the last family I have I can't no longer allow people to come and suddenly go. Maybe in this life we are just the creature of loss we left everything behind creating memories and then leave them. We are just remembers of life that gives us lesson and emotional damages.
For my case, the storms can never destroy my life since it was perfectly ruin buy the people I wanted to be with.
What's worst? leaving people you love? or being left behind.