"Lily"
A beautiful flower that I could not keep even if it was given to me hundreds of times by the person I love.
---
It has been a week since I met Solon in this life and I was trying my best not to see him as much as I can.
It was a good thing that both Ash and him were part of the student council so they have less time to idle because of school works though there are times where I would casually saw them in some common places like cafeteria and hallway but lucky enough, I was fast to run away before they even saw me.
"Why do you keep on avoiding Ash?" Monica asked.
We were walking on our way home when she asked it out of the blue.
"Umm, am I required to meet him daily?" I asked her instead but she hit my back.
"What the heck! What kind of lover are you!? If you're not going to treat him well, then give him to me sheesh." Monica ranted.
I just laughed at her.
Ash was indeed kind, sweet and handsome but I didn't feel anything like love towards him. Maybe admiration? He was cool and also has a very pretty voice but I don't know what the heck is wrong with this body or what kind of defect I have that I can't fall in love with such a perfect man.
"That guy... He asked me to give this to you." Monica said as she handed me a Lily.
I took it and asked...
"From Ash?"
"No. It was from Solon." Monica said with a grumpy face.
I felt my heart skips a beat.
Fuck it...
So this is my defect...
Even after being reborn, this heart still beats for that jerk... Stupid Amiya, why can't I even let go of this feeling that I had back then!?
I threw the Lily and walked away.
"Tell him I don't like it..." I said as Monica follows me from behind.
"Ooh! That's my girl! So are you finally letting go of your other man?" she teased.
I smiled.
"I never really said I want him." I said.
Monica looked shocked with what I answered and she never seemed to moved on from then.
***
Days passed and every time I look under my desk I see a Lily on it as if it was blooming there everyday.
Knowing it was from Solon, I quickly dispose it somewhere I will never see it.
It seems like he didn't take my word when I asked Monica to tell him that I did not like it. To be honest I love that flower, but the thought that it was coming from him? I just couldn't take it. He was just wasting his time.
"What the heck girl! Why are you throwing that again! You're wasting his effort, aren't you going to at least keep it for his sake?" my friend scolded me.
He was a hardcore Solon biased, I don't know why though.
"He's wasting my time too. He knew I have Ash yet he still pursue me? Isn't he crazy? Or Is he just dumb?" I said.
"Wow, you seriously have an attitude problem girl." my friend said.
Me? Why me? I was just stating the fact.
***
These conversations kept repeating daily as Solon continued to send Lily to me as if he knew nothing.
I was actually getting annoyed but I could never bring myself to see him face to face so I had to ask Monica to tell him what I wanted to say.
Monica on the other hand, was getting sick and tired with this set up too so without telling me, she set me up to meet Solon by using her connections.
I had to attend an art exhibit along with him because of the principal's order. It was originally Monica and Solon who would be attending since they were part of the student council but this sister of mine... She purposely took all the other task of their members and pretend she was busy so she had to send me in her stead.
What the fuck...
"Lia..." Solon called me.
He picked me up from our house early in the morning before I could run away so I had no choice but to go with him.
And guess what... My freaking heart is acting up again against my will.
Stop beating fast stupid heart! Stupid Amiya!
"Let's go?" Solon asked.
I couldn't help but to look at his eyes and I was lost in the moment... Just what the heck...
He held my hand as we went inside the gallery. He was holding my hand as if I'll run away if he let go.
We just stayed like that the whole time we were at the gallery and all this body did was surrender and melt with his gaze and touch.
Just b*llshit...
After the art exhibition, he brought me to a fancy restaurant for our dinner. What a show off...
I kept my mouth shut as I don't want this messed up reincarnation self of mine to spout nonsense in front of this jerk.
"I'm sorry..." he said as we were about to finish eating.
I gave him a confused look as he was acting as if he did something wrong.
"I know you felt uncomfortable with me this whole day... But I can't help it... It was my only chance to talk to you... Hold you and stare at you...
Sorry..." he muttered.
Good thing he knew that. I was indeed uncomfortable the whole time I was with him but because of this stupid body of mine, I secretly enjoyed it as well as much as I don't want to.
"It's fine... I think I enjoyed it somewhat too..." I said while avoiding his gaze.
I was weak... I hate him to the core but I can't help myself but to fall in love... The one and only thing I wanted to avoid my whole life.
"Thank you..." Solon said as he smiled as if it was the happiest day of his life.
This is what I was scared of... I never wanted to meet him because I'm afraid I'll give in... Him smiling was like hope for me, his gestures makes me want to hug him tightly and his voice makes me want to kiss him as if he did nothing wrong to me...
His existence was like a sweet poison to me... I don't want to love him but I know I will still end up doing so. He was a poison I can't avoid...
I stood up and left him abruptly as I need to get back to my senses.
I can't be like this... Not this time too...
I ran away but he was quick to catch up and he grabbed my arms and pulled me into a tight hug.
"Don't leave me..." he whispered.
As if on cue, my tear started falling and I couldn't hear anything but him.
"Why are you doing this to me?" I asked.
He looked into my eyes and said...
"I love you..."
It was that time as well when a crashing car went into our way out of no where...
It was too sudden that I couldn't feel anything as if everything stopped. I just saw Solon, he was laying down while looking at me and was covered with blood while trying to reach my hand.
And before I lose my consciousness, I heard him say...
"Don't die... Amiya..."