𝘑𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘸𝘰𝘯 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘦𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘺𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘰𝘯.
Jungwon has been very stressed lately. From promotions, to his members, to their manager and the company staff, he was responsible for everything. Recently, since their two week promotion has ended, they were frequently on VLIVE. Many of the members like to share their stories about them when they were promoting the past two weeks. However, when it came to the fans asking for TMI and spoilers, Jungwon would panic and stress out. He has been called out by the company for his members' actions, and would get scolded and yelled at by not only the manager, but the company's staff.
This led to Jungwon's mental health making a downfall. He couldn't deal with the pressure of telling his members to not spoil and leak too much info about their daily lives. He also couldn't help but nod his head in shame when he is being scolded for his member's actions. No one notices their leader starting to fall silent when they go on variety shows, when they get interviewed, he gets so cold, and barely shows his love for the fans anymore.
That night, after pre-recording a variety show, Enhypen goes back to their home. The ride home starts to get quiet as Jungwon rarely talks to create the atmosphere anymore. Jungwon was too engrossed in his own mind as he once again reflects what pd nim told him. 𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙪𝙥𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙠𝙚𝙚𝙥 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙢𝙤𝙪𝙩𝙝 𝙨𝙝𝙪𝙩 𝙪𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙡 𝙤𝙛𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙡 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨. 𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙨 𝙨𝙤 𝙙𝙞𝙛𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙪𝙡𝙩 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩? He tries to shake his thought off, but didn't realise that he was actually shaking his head. "Jungwon ah, you okay? Why are are you shaking your head?" Jay laughs it off, thinking it was cute of him.
After their meal, Niki pulls his brother into the bedroom. Jungwon was about to ask why he did that, but was cut off by a hug. "Hyung, I can tell you are sad. Why, did Niki do something wrong?" Jungwon was shocked when Niki said that. A million thoughts ran through Jungwon's mind. He was blanking out, before tears ran down his face. "Niki ah," Jungwon cries, hugging back the younger. "You can tell us if you need help, hyung," Niki speaks cutely, trying his best to cheer him up.
Help. Help? Do I need help? Jungwon thinks so hard at what Niki had said. All of a sudden, more tears came out, and Jungwon couldn't take it anymore. Niki triggered him. "Help? Do I look like I need help? What do you think I am? You think I'm sick? I need HELP? Just go Niki! Get out!" Jungwon screams, in mental agony. Niki was so taken aback, tears fall on his face too. "H..hyung, you know that's not what I mea-" "GET OUT!" Niki starts to cry as he leaves the room, sadly.
Jungwon locks himself in the room, feeling so down. So depressed. How can Niki say that to him? Maybe, Niki was right. I need help. I'm just a sick and evil and shitty leader that only knows how to yell at his members. I'm a monster. Jungwon cries, his own thoughts polluting his mind.
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Niki POV
Niki cries sadly, leaving the room to see the rest of the group sitting on the couch, enjoying a movie. "Niki ah, what's wrong??" Heeseung rushes to him, the rest following. He couldn't say a word, more tears flowing out, as he falls to the floor, crying, scolding himself a useless person. A useless friend, a useless brother. Niki looks up to see his members' worried glances. "I'm such a bad person, hyung. Jungwon hyung is suffering alone, and I had to aggravate him. I'm such an idiot," Niki cries, hugging whoever was in front of him.
After explaining to the rest what is happening, Jay comforts Niki as Heeseung rushes to the bedroom door that was still locked.
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Jungwon cries helplessly after Niki leaves. His whole mind was about get rid of himself for the better. As he thought more and more about how pathetic he is, his eyes travel to the box cutter on the table. Not in the right mind, he picks it up. Upset at everything he has gone through, he slices one after another on his arms. Blood spills over his body onto the floor, cut after cut that just caused formed a blood stream out of his body. "I deserve this," Jungwon cries to himself, cutting his palms as he clenches over the box cutter. The pain brought ease to his mind, as he thought that this was his deserved punishment, from the world.
As he started to get dizzy, Heeseung knocks on the door. "Jungwon ah, it's me. Heeseung hyung. Are you okay? Can I come in?" "NO! I mean, no. Please, leave me alone." Jungwon pleaded. Heeseung got worried, and he budged in, with Sunoo and Jake. They rushed in to see a horrid site. Blood, everywhere. "JUNGWON AH!" Jake and Heeseung run over to him, Sunoo too stunned to speak, covering his mouth. Jungwon just seemed like a lifeless doll, that had no strength to do anything, and just wanted to lie there.
The rest of the members were shocked, but they sprang to action. They brought their leader to the dining table, wrapping his arms and hands in bandage. No amount of alcohol placed on the wounds could even cause their leader to flinch. He was emotionless, expressionless. "I'm sorry, everyone," Jungwon just gets to his feet, but nearly falls as he gets caught by Heeseung, worried glances thrown at him. Jungwon tries to laugh it off, but ultimately, Heeseung had to lift the baby onto his bed.
As they surrounded Jungwon, tears rolled down his eyes. "Why did you do that, honey?" Heeseung mom asks. "I'm sorry... I couldn't take it...I felt that I deserved it...Everyone at the company yells at me because you guys love to drop spoilers, and as a leader I am responsible for your actions, pd nim said," Jungwon sniffles. The members' hearts ache as they realised how much their leader suffered for them. Drifting of to sleep together on Jungwon's bed, they couldn't help but engulf him in a tight hug, never wanting to let go. We're sorry, Jungwon ah.