So, there I was, all strapped up with my hard-earned money and well-intended plan and like all things that are half-baked, it also went awry when my student visa got rejected.
And to top it off, I didn't get admission to any of the universities. Really America, really? Can't you spare one teeny tiny seat in all of those universities? Not that any other place would have done since as per Nani, Mom went to New York and got pregnant.
So, I have to be in New York. Like, HAVE to.
Even with no visa, I didn't deter from my plan. Instead, this time I cooked a full story with all the spicy condiments for my aunt.
"What do you mean you are going to America???"
My aunt asked calmly, her face turning red. Others bellow. My aunt simpers. But both are deadly.
"Just what I meant. I think it's time I concentrate on my future. There are engineers a dime a dozen in India. I won't be any different"
"Exactly. Why do you need to go outside when there is a dime a dozen here?" Aunt crossed her legs and sat straight on her 'throne' (chair) while arguing about my fate.
Keethu is standing behind me no doubt sending daggers to my back at this unexpected plan I shoved down her throat. It's not like I want to keep it a secret but my sister is really bad at keeping a secret. And if she knows I'm leaving here before this she will try everything to ruin my plan. Not that it needs any help for ruination.Still... Keethu's temper matches her actions. She will spill the beans first and then regrets doing it.
"Because I wanted more," I squared my shoulders.
You can hear the crickets chirping in the silence that followed.
"More?" My aunt's blank face didn't encourage me to elaborate.
Still, I did. I'm a gluten for punishment.
"I don't want to be stuck with a lower salary. It will take eons to get a hike with the current competition. Anyways, nowadays everyone is following the same plan. First engineering and then going to America for an MBA degree. And after that, life is settled"
"Perhaps you have forgotten Sameera. Girls in our society don't think of going to America all alone."
"Aunt Malini, please. America... America is my dream. My destiny is there"
"Even so, we can't spare the money for your expenses. It's better you forget about this stupid dream just like-"
She doesn't have to say Keethu. The sudden intake of breath behind my back let me know she heard what our aunt didn't say.
I felt guilty for reminding Keethu. Even after a year, it's still fresh for her. But I have to try.
"There is no need for your money. I can manage on my own"
Aunt Malini's lips thinned. "Where did you get the money?"
"I have my ways. Relax. It's nothing illegal"
I don't want her to know how much I collected all these years. Let her think this idea is only my newest fancy. If she knows how much I'm earning to leave she might use it. It's like a predator scenting the blood of its prey.
A shiver crawled up my spine. Focus Sam.
"Still... I can't let you leave. You are already 20-years-old. I think it's time for you to get married. If you want to think of your future, think about your future husband and kids"
I gritted the back of my teeth. Great!!! Another thing to tackle.
"I'm just 20. I don't think I'm ready for marriage. At least, not yet. I want to do something with my life first"
"Sameera-"
I stopped to my knees before her chair and carefully took her hand into mine.
Ok, Sam, you can do it. Time for waterworks. Give your best shot. Oscar award, here I come.
"Aunt... aunt Malini. I know how tough it was for you. I can't even imagine how you were able to handle us. You had your own family, still, you included us in yours. I could never forget the sacrifices you did-"
Someone snorted loudly behind my back. Probably Keethu.
Not now Keethu. Can't you see I'm giving an award-winning performance here?
I bent my head and blinked rapidly to get some tears into my eyes. Damn it!!!
In desperation, I bit the inside of my cheek and like a reaction, my eyes flooded from the pain. Yes, there, now it seems authentic.
"I could never forget the sacrifices you made for us. How difficult it must have been to handle three unruly-," someone cleared their throat in the background. Probably my uncle, "I mean... two unruly kids with one nicely-behaved boy? How tedious it must have been for you to juggle work and home? (Not that she does anything. We have three maids to look after the house and uncle and their manager look after the hotels. Still, in dire situations you need to use all weapons in your arsenal) yet... yet, you handled it all single-handedly. You are not just our aunt, aunt Malini, you are our mother. You are our mother India"
Am I going too far? Time to tone it down a little.
"I mean, without you, we wouldn't have known what's mother's love felt. You are the one who showed it to us aunt Malini"
Aunt Malini blinked, her cheeks blushing pink as she tapped lightly on the backside of my hand good-naturedly.
"Sameera... I care about you. Whatever I did, I'm doing, it's for your own good," my aunt said earnestly.
And truth be told, she believes it. It's only that her truth and mine are different. But she is not of the bad sort. That's why even after last year, I couldn't resent her like Keethu is doing.
"I agree aunt Malini. I understand. But please... don't you think I should live two years, just two years, making my own decisions before marrying someone? Once married, I have to follow whatever my in-laws suggest. You should know. After marrying uncle, when was the last time you had time for yourself?"
She had all the time in the world, but better not to point it out.
"Umm... it's not like that"
I grasped her hands tightly as if she might fly away from her seat.
"No aunt Malini. I understand, I truly understand. You are a prisoner amidst these four walls, living away like a bird in the cage"
Keethu coughed loudly.
"I don't want to be another bird aunt Malini. Let me spread my wings. Only once. Let me fly"
"Sameera"
"Please aunty... please"
Here is the tip- my aunt can't resist when I call her aunty with my puppy eyes. I even suggest Keethu do it sometimes but she never cooperates.
"How will you live there alone? We don't know anyone in America. How will you manage?"
Thus, my friends, is how you win a match.
"You leave that all to me. I will handle everything"
It was not until I entered my room once again that Keethu bombarded me with her statements.
"How could you???"
"Now see here Keethu-"
"No!!!! I won't."
"Keethu please-"
"I want to fly aunty... let me fly, fly," Keethu raised her arms like a bird and flapped them. It looked really funny when it combined with her petite frame. Unlike my gazelle's height, she is only 5.3". The only thing common among us is our bone structure.
However, I curbed the urge. It will only enrage her more.
"Keethu it's not funny," I said sternly, thinning my lips, trying to look serious.
"I can't believe she fell for that movie line," she said with a frown as if she hadn't thought about it when it was her time (last year regarding her college course).
Frankly speaking, me neither. I guess my aunt not watching Bollywood movies is an advantage for me.
"You are not our aunt... you are our mother. In fact, you are mother India"
My nose itches as I controlled my laugh.
"Really Sam? Really? Mother India? You are the worst actor in the world"
"Be that it is, our aunt bought it. That's what it counts"
"And now you are leaving us, leaving me?" Her shoulders slumped.
"Hey," I moved forward and engulfed her in a hug.
"You know I love you right?"
"Right," she gave a snort.
"Keethu-"
"But you are still leaving me"
"I wouldn't if there is another way. But I have to do this Keethu. For the sake of my sanity, I have to try before our aunt traps me in some boring marriage"
"What if she takes her revenge on me?"
"Just try not to instigate her and you will be safe"
"I can't promise you that," she muttered bending her head.
"Keethu... please. Just for a while. You will see. Once I settled there, I will bring you with me. Maybe... maybe we could create a home for us there"
"Do you think our aunt will let it happen? You are good Sam, I give you that. But not that good that our aunt forgets about us and the property that may slip from her fingers"
"According to the law, it's already hers Keethu. She has nothing to fear from us"
"Actually, it's Abhi's but who is taking note! Anyways, forget about it. What will you do when you go there?"
I turned and got busy arranging my books when I said over my shoulder, "I got admitted into NYU. Once I finish my MBA, it will be easy to get a job. And then I can bring you there"
Liar liar pants on fire.
"Two years?"
"It looks like forever but... trust me Keethu, the time will pass in a blink"
"I will miss you, Sam. I don't think I can stay away for that long. Why do you have to go? Why can't you study here?"
Keethu stomped her feet as her eyes blurred with tears.
"Keethu"
"No. You are just like them. Just like mom and dad. You too want to leave me. Go. Go away and stay happy, living your dream. I hate you. I hate you"
Keethu ran away from my room, breaking my heart. Even till the day, I boarded my flight, she was angry with me, refusing to talk or meet my eye.
On the other hand, my Nani is busy giving me instructions- "don't forget to take pictures of the nude beach. I heard it's very popular there."
"Nani!!!" I scanned my vicinity. We are standing at the terminal, ready to board in 2 hours.
"What?" She blinked her eyes innocently. Too innocently.
"There are no nude beaches in New York"
"Then go to the place where they are"
"Seriously Nani!!" I threw my hands up.
"Ahh... alright. At least, try some strip club"
"That's it. You are watching too many US movies"
"Girl, speak for yourself. I just watch p*rn"
I squeezed my eyes shut. No granddaughter needed to hear that.
"You know you are 60-years-old right?"
"What are you talking about? I have been 45 for 5 years now," she tucked her ear as if I offended her.
"Nani, it's not a train to stop at a certain station. It's age."
"You know nothing. I'm elder. When you grow old your age stops sometimes"
"Only sometimes?"
Nani ignored my teasing eye.
"Come here, you cougar," I engulfed her in a hug squeezing the life out of her.
"I will miss you"
"Ya... ya," she tapped my back as if she is the one who is embarrassed. Sometimes, I feel like I'm the adult in our relationship.
"Take care of Keethu for me?"
"Still not talking to you?"
"No," I looked solemnly at the silhouette of my sister who is busily scuffing her shoes on the pavement.
"She will come around"
"Will she ever forgive me?"
"Only time will tell"
"I will come back soon once I finished my MBA"
Something glinted in Nani's eyes as if she can sense the lie I'm trying to conceal.
"I thought it was only the look you share with your mom. But you proved me wrong. I can see the itch you are trying so hard to conceal"
I opened my mouth to deny.
"Let it be. I won't say anything to your aunt. But please take care of yourself there"
"Sure," I said meekly, my cheeks turning red at her admonishment. Has she sensed something? Am I slipping?
Next came my aunt to bid adieu. She looked confused as if how on earth has she agreed to this yet her pride stopped her from voicing it out.
Finally, it was Keethu and me. "Won't you talk to me even now?"
She came running into my arms and cried on my shoulder.
"Please don't go"
"I have to Keethu. But I promise we will be back together. Like always"
"Promise?"
"Yes"
"Gosh! You are ruining my chick look," she pushed back swiping her hair back and discreetly wiping tears.
"You are beautiful just the way you are"
"Not more than you Sam"
"No. More than me," I whispered sweetly. I'm going to miss that girl like crazy.
So, there I was, lying through my teeth to my family and breaking my sister's heart to find HIM with no Visa, no college, no MBA.
In fact, I'm visiting on a tourist Visa and it expires in 2 months unless I get a seat in any college.