"Wow… you may look different, but you seem the same to me." Claire yawns on cue as though bored by us and drops her arms to return them to her trolley.
"Don't let us keep you. I'm sure you're very busy making money for MY company. Wouldn't want to delay you from doing that." I raise a brow, catch the side of our cart and pull it to swerve around her, taking Greta with me.
"You don't think your reappearance works in my favor?" She cattily laughs at our backs, and I freeze mid-walk, fighting the urge to turn and face her.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Greta bites for me. Too hot-tempered for her own good. I turn and look her way too. Spinning on the girl, I quickly glance around, looking for bystanders who might be paying us too much attention and seeing nothing.
"He held onto a ghost for two years and could never move forward. No one can battle a dead person who hangs over someone's soul like a black cloud. But you're here now….. he can let go of his guilt, remember the reason he left you, and finally move on. We can pick up where we left off, and my patience will be repaid." She picks up a pack of cherries and tosses them in her cart, pulling it back to turn away, and smiles like an evil witch, a cat who got the cream, and it riles me.
"So, you two really are nothing? Like he said. I guess that sucks, given how hard you must have fought to get him in the first place. All I had to do was leave, and boom…. your boyfriend lost interest." It's an impulsive bitch response, fuelled by how different she seems now and how much more I dislike her. At least the old Claire was somewhat warm and innocent, with attractive qualities, but this version is everything Jyeon hated about me. I wonder if she modeled herself to try and coax him back to her side without really understanding what it was that drove him away from me. I guess he never actually told her in great detail why he didn't love me back then.
"I stepped back to let him grieve. I'm still here aren't I? Supporting him, working with him, being around him. I heard you would be signing divorce papers and trotting back to fantasia to live your sweet little island life before long…what do you think will happen when he has that kind of closure? I'll be right here, and Jyeon is worth the wait."
"You can have him. She hasn't lost anything; she only gained a ton more. Look at you… there's nothing so great about you at all…. You kinda remind me of the mess I picked up off the road two years ago. Pretty sure the reason she got there was because Jyeon hates your type, so I wouldn't hold your breath, honey. If you gave yourself a sad makeover to win him round, you picked the wrong version of Sohla. Good luck with that." Greta snorts at her, swings her ass back around, sliding her arm in mine, and tugs me with her to make it clear we're done here. I clamp my mouth shut to stop the oncoming giggling reaction to how harsh she just was. Loving my fiery demon for her ability to shut people down with brutal truths.
"Sohla?" her snooty voice brings me to a hesitated step, and I glance back over my shoulder.
"What?" I snap it out.
"Feels a little full circle, doesn't it? Should I offer you money to sign the papers sooner and leave? Remind you how your presence only hurts his life? Ask you to consider him in this and his future?" She smiles in a twisty and self-satisfied way that only kicks up the anger inside me, and that low-dwelling Sohla of my soul pulls her claws out. The audacity she has to try and make this a mirror to back then and the requests I made. I still have the right more than she does to demand those things even now.
"The difference is…. you want him. I don't. It's Jyeon who won't let me loose and is the one clinging on for dear life to make me stay with him. He never did that with you, not once. Did he ever tell you he loves you? Because he's told me several times since he brought me home. That he wants a fresh start with me… If it's about his future and the benefits… then I am a perfect choice, yet … I no longer care or prioritize his future." I flick my hair back over my shoulder, enjoying the crumbling of her expression, and it gives me my answer. The wounding pain she can't conceal and the instant watery glaze that shines her eyes. There was truth in his revelation that he never loved her, it seems.
"He's confused. He doesn't know how he feels. The way you left was a mess. We didn't have time to begin. He's eaten with guilt and feels like a failure for not protecting you. For hurting you. It's not love…. It's responsibility. He feels obligated. He took the blame for everything about your entire relationship because you faked death and hurt him in ways you can never understand. Don't hold your breath thinking his love has depth because it doesn't, and he'll soon figure it out the longer he's around you again." She's seething, losing the grip on her temper, and her emotions and bitterness are flying free. She may look and act like the old me, but she misses the ability to hold it in, switch it off and deaden her heart when a scenario asks for it. She's pathetic.
"Whatever it is… it doesn't change a thing. I don't remember him, and I have no feelings either way about him. You do whatever you need to do to hold onto the man who doesn't want you. None of this hurts me in any way. I'll happily walk out without you feeling the need to compensate. I'm a billionairess and own a huge chunk of OLO… that didn't change at all. Jyeon could have kept it all by walking by me and pretending I didn't exist, yet he brought me here to give it all back. I don't need your pocket change. I'm sure I still earn more than a mere director of my own company without even getting out of bed."
Greta grins, eyeing me up, and curbs her own need to wade in. Seeing the person I can sometimes be, holding her own. My calm manner and careful, precise way of talking, without emotions. I haven't lost it at all. I guess the two versions of me both still exist, but they found a way to live happily together after all inside of one body. I turn on my heel, ready to truly be done with wasting time on this sad replica. A swelling pride in how good it feels to battle her head-on after the pain she caused me then.
"I never understood what he saw in you at all... what held him back. What crazy witchcraft you had that could make him both hate and love you to the point he couldn't leave and yet couldn't stay. You messed with his head and made him crazy. You're a demon. Just leave already and stop fucking with his life." Her tears break, her voice wavering, and she's desperately clinging to the handlebar of her cart so that her knuckles are white. Losing her composure.
"Jyeon needs to figure that out on his own. It's nothing to do with me. I'm all set to leave as soon as he lets me." I don't raise my voice or bite. I nod, bidding her goodbye, and push Greta to get going again.
"Must be why she's trying to be you now. In hopes, she wins him back. So fucking weird." Greta mumbles to me under her breath.
"Give it time, Sohla. He hated you once…. He will again. He'll remember every fucking reason he came to me and found comfort in the arms of another woman. You're no different at all. He will see that soon enough, and all his rose-tinted memories and fluffy ideas about a new start will wither to shit."
"Whatever, you psychopathic weirdo…. You're giving us a headache with your mindless whining. So long, deary. Have a nice day." Greta waves her way, hooks her arm around my waist, and propels me onwards at speed so we can't be stopped for any more dialogue with this wench.
"She's something alright," I whisper as we walk.
"You know, the petty part of me now wants you to seduce Jyeon …. just to piss her off. Take that smug pitch out of her annoying face." Greta growls under her breath, grabs a massive bag of salted popcorn in passing, and dumps them in our cart. Shrugging, and I know she isn't serious, but it does ding a response in my heart.
"Don't tempt me. I still harbor a very real and deep scar from the existence of that woman in my past. I don't need the head mess, though. Jyeon is a grey area for me. I'm not looking for revenge anymore because it'll only hurt me in the long run."
"I get it, and I know. I'm not encouraging it. I'm just saying,….. karma."
That's all I would need. Pouncing on him to exact revenge on them both and leaving his ass behind when I was done. Me of old would have jumped at the chance to screw them over this way, inflict maximum damage, but I can't even contemplate it anymore. Not just because it's twisted and petty and I've grown as a person, but because Jyeon isn't the same, and I can't ignore how I'm softening to him. I don't have it in me to play with fire. It's too raw, too close to the surface, and my heart might screw me over if I allow myself to surrender to him.