The sound of the heart monitor came to her unconscious mind and she wondered if she was dead or alive.
Fighting to come out of the deep void she found herself was proving to be a task. Her eyes felt like lids and when she eventually got them to open up the bright light made her wince in pain before shutting them up again. She spent the next minutes, closing and opening her eyes until she could finally make sense of her surrounding. It was a room in the hospital. She was lying on a hospital bed.
She groaned in pain. She was still stuck in hell. How was she even in the hospital? She could clearly remember that no one had been there at the bridge because of the rainy, windy weather.
The door suddenly opened, her mom and dad rushed into the room with the doctor right behind them.
Was this real, she thought. There was no way her parents would be worried over her even if she was dying in a hospital bed.
Her mom was the first to break the silence and she sounded so concerned that her heart rate increased in confusion.
"Ariana, sweetheart are you alright. We thought we might have lost you for good. Do you have any idea how much suffering you've put us through? How could you think of committing suicide? Why didn't you talk to us?"
Her father pulled her back, chastising her.
"Give her some space Sandie, she's just recovering. We can talk about that later ok" he says placing a comforting hand on her shoulder.
The doctor got busy checking her vitals and making sure she was alright.
She wanted to yell. Why were they suddenly acting like good caring parents when they were nothing close to that.
If they hit her, cursed at her, or try to take her for deliverance then she wouldn't mind it in the least amount. But here they were. Hypocrites!
Acting as they cared for her when they didn't.
"Ariana, say something "
She let her eyes close slowly as she felt oppressive hands pressing her into the bed she laid on. Everything was meaningless to her. She tried to brace herself for the pain and shame that lay ahead of her, wondering about the person who saved her life. She blamed the person for bringing her back to suffer.
Even when she wanted to die, there was no escape for her.
Voices came from a far distance to her, she tuned them out until all she heard was humming in her ears.
**********
Three days later.
The doctor discharged her after her treatment. He recommended a therapist for her and also gave her antidepressants. She had refused to speak since she woke up. She knew it drove her parents crazy but she didn't care. It made her crazy too that they were still pretending to care.
All she wanted to do was to sleep and never wake up, yet even that was hard to ask for.
The car ride was silent, with nervous glances passing between her parents. She needed it to stay that way. For once she wanted the world to be silent.
They got home and she came out of the car, promptly walking towards the door to their modest apartment. Her hand was suddenly grabbed, then her shoulder, and she was yanked around to face her mom.
"Ariana please talk to me. I need to know if you're ok. I know we've been bad parents, I admit that now because I never thought you'd try to kill yourself. This has been a wake-up call for us and we are sorry baby, please forgive us. I promise we'll be better, just say something." She pleaded, eyes holding Ariana's.
"I don't care," she said in a low voice filled with bitterness and resentment. "I hate you both and I want to die. I hate this world!" She cried out wringing her arm away from her hold. She noticed the look of fear and fluster on her mom's face as she looked to her father for help. He gently shook his head for her to let it be.
She struggled to open the door. Her mom held up the keys. She stepped aside as she got to the door. Once her mom got it to open, she stepped past her into the house, rushing to her room, banging the door shut, and dropping to the floor.
Her room had been redecorated with a big poster on which was written"welcome home. We love you" that hung at the center of her room.
She stood up, dragging it down, and flinging it to a corner in rage.
She sat down on her bed warily, noticing the laptop on her desk. She couldn't go near it. So much hate spewed off it, from people she considered friends and those who didn't even know her at all.
Her schoolmates were the worst. She dreaded going back to school. The shame would never go away.
Zach-his name was an outcry in her head. He had appeared out of the blue, the first and only guy who took notice of her since her school year. She had always been invisible but he made people see her, he had adored her with every breath he took. That's what she had thought because he was that convincing. It was all a lie, a game. An evil game to ruin her life and reputation. The reason for such cruelty, she could never figure out.
They dated for four months. She had trusted him completely because he never gave her a reason to doubt that he was genuine.
He had asked for sex in the first month of their relationship but when she told him she wasn't ready for it, he assured her that he could wait and that he loved her all the same. Months went by and her best friend kept pressuring her that if she didn't give him sex, he was going to get bored and leave her for someone more willing.
He was the only guy who loved her and made her feel important, beautiful. She could be intimate with him, right?. That would even make their bond stronger she had reasoned.
So she had sex with him and it was beautiful. It was perfect. She felt like the only girl in the world until she woke up the next day to notifications blowing up her phone. Vicious and degrading comments, messages asking her for quick sex, insults, and even death threats. She finally found the source to be a video of her and Zach having sex online. A video of their private night together where she had given up her virginity to him because she thought they both loved and respected each other. He had posted it himself. She had thought she was seeing things at first but it was real.
She didn't know how to react because it was unbelievable. She felt herself in a constant state of denial. Zach could never do that to her but it was all true. He had done it himself and her life was ruined. She felt like she was losing her mind. How could she ever face anyone, ever?
The video was on the internet. She was about to call Mia her best friend to tell her about what happened only for another video to appear on her phone of Mia and Zach. They were together, celebrating their first anniversary while she was labeled as the school slut who banged her best friend's boyfriend.
She had cried so much. The void he created was so vast that anytime she remembered him or what happened, she felt like jumping off the bridge or just taking pills and never waking up. She had decided to end it all, but that didn't happen.
She hurled her laptop at the wall and screamed out her pain.
Nothing would be the same again.
Never again.
Vote, read, and leave a comment on what you think.
A/N: any high school experience you wanna share??????.
Leahgisselle