After I ate my cake, I looked around for Belinda but I couldn't find her. Where is she? She is supposed to be with me till the end of my birthday. That is what friends are for, yeah?
I cut a slice of a cake and climb the stairs to go check Belinda in my room but I can't find her, I walk into the guest room as she always love it there and she isn't in it either which means I have only one option remaining, my brother's room.
As soon as I enter, I look at the room. It is the same as it used to be. After the police had gone through it I made sure that everything went the way it was, I even made sure to return the picture which was on the table near the bedside. I kept everything as it used to be.
I look at the bedside and I can't see the picture.
Panic.
My heart clenched, where did it go?
The last time I was in the room I left it here on the table near the bedside, and by last time I mean today morning. I made sure to come to check the room and whispered to it while imagining it was Brandon, "I am a year-old brother."
As if Brandon's voice would come out of nowhere and answer me. Even if there was no answer it gave me a little bit of hope to push me through the day.
"Brenda." I hear Belinda calling me, looking on the bed, she is curled up, holding the picture of me and Brandon.
"Bel, I was looking for you everywhere," I tell her.
"Come here," Belinda told me and moved a little bit to the corner. I looked at her eyes and they were red, I guess from crying. She is missing Brandon too, and here I thought I was all alone.
"I miss him Bree so much it hurts," said Belinda looking at me with her swollen red eyes.
What am I supposed to answer her?
I can't tell her, "Oh! Sweetie me too, I miss him so much."
Then we become best crying buddies, and then we go share our lives forever.
Hell no!
"Hey, it's okay. It's going to be okay." I told her and hearing myself saying that I felt bad, I hate that line, "it's going to be okay." That cliché line I have heard my mother and father repeatedly telling me.
Belinda nodded at me and I stayed quiet, I didn't want to talk and I thank God Belinda neither did. We stayed in bed for a bit longer and Belinda said she was becoming sleepy.
I asked her if I should escort her to one of the guest rooms and she didn't resist, she knew why. Brandon's room is mine and mine alone, well while I wait for him to come back, I am planning to keep it safe and as it used to be before.
I helped Belinda into the bed and headed to my room, I checked my wardrobe and found my favorite hood. Brandon's of course. Yeah, I know. I wanted to feel him close, wanted to feel him here. I had washed the hood over and over and the scent has faded but I still wear it.
I took off my dress and wore a nightdress then threw then the hood, I went into the bed and lay down thinking of how it should be if Brandon was here on my birthday. I am sure we will be laughing our asses off, and him laughing at me on how she was still older than me.
I made some wishes tonight and I hope they come true, I am not sure though but if they come through then I will be the happiest lady ever.
I am sure they are also celebrating their birthday and one of my wishes was for me to be with them the next time we celebrate our birthday.
They and them? Who do I mean by that?
They are all beautiful and talented ladies.
I admire them, but from afar, saying I adore them would be an understatement. I love them, I have been stalking them over the last three years.
No! Not stalking actually, I have been watching them over the last three years and by now I know everything about them. I have learned their behaviors, personalities, dressing code, walking style, the type of food they like, where they love to go. Everything about them is in here in my head.
When I say everything, I mean everything.
My beautiful five sisters.
Even though they don't know I am watching them, I love it. I always anticipate the time of the day of the time I watch them. It gives me a purpose, I watch over them each, one by one since they have different jobs.
But wherever and whenever they are together, I can't help but want to go there and tell them "Hey you are having fun without your other sister. I am Brenda by the way your other sister."
But I can't.
I have a purpose, a purpose to keep them safe because the last thing I want to happen to them is what happened to Brandon.
As I lay in my bed, I smiled remembering the day I had first seen my beautiful sisters on tv.
********************************************
[FLASHBACK]
"Brenda no! come on put the remote down. It's family time to watch the news come on," my mom had said while looking at me. We are sitting together in the sitting room; it is family time and all of us had to be in the sitting room even though all of us had a tv in our rooms.
News bore me out of my head and it's always a no-go zone. It was boring and I wanted to get another thing on the tv.
I grunt slowly as a ten-year-old would and continue changing from one station to another until I get stuck on one station. An interview is going on, and it shocks me.
Five girls, smiling beautifully while staring at each other.
"I am going to the bedroom mum I will be back, hey, no one is going to change the channel, right?" I say to my parents and my brother and run to my bedroom.
"I am back guys; I went to the bedroom to bring my photos album. Look at this, dad move closer. Brandon look here."
As I continue showing my parents the pictures all of them are staring at me as if I have lost my mind. Brandon is looking at me as if I have just grown two heads.
"Brandon, why are you staring at me like that?" I ask him.
"Look at me, look at them. We look alike." I say to my parents and Brandon while pointing to the tv and the photos in my album.
"Brandon?" I call Brandon and nothing, as I look at him my adorable little mind can't seem to get why he is staring at me with regrets and fear in his eyes.
"We look alike Brandon, yes?" I ask Brandon again and he looks at my parent who look like they have been struck by lighting and I begin to worry.
I look at Brandon again, who by now is turning red and I am getting more scared wondering.
"Is it wrong that I look like the girls on the tv doing the interview?"