DISCLAMER: This was over a year ago and me and him are no longer together.
I cheated a few months ago... why did I do it? Was it my intention? No... I never meant to hurt anyone... it's not like I kissed anyone... or slept with anyone... it was all over text and very immature and selfish and mean... I never meant to hurt the love of my life. He is the love of my life! Why did I do it?!! Only for revenge... I know what you are thinking... "Couldn't you just get revenge by being happy with the one amazing guy that truly loves and cares about you?" Yes... I could have. But I decided to go the terrible way... the revenge way. I messaged the guy who hurt me. I made him fall for me and I hurt him the same way he hurt me. But I wasn't as mean about it. He was my biggest secret and I never even had feelings for him. My boyfriend found the messages and just left my house not even telling me he was leaving or that he saw something... I was in the shower... I completely broke the person I am madly in love with and was it worth it? Fuck no. It wasn't worth it at all. I broke the love of my life. I almost lost him because of that. Because of me being so immature. I am an idiot. I broke the love of my life. I broke my life. He was so great and has given me a second chance. That means the absolute world to me. He means the world to me. I'm never going to do something as stupid as that again. I am never going to break someone again. No one deserves that pain... and as for the guy I was playing right back. I am sorry... I was petty. I know even you never deserved that. No one ever deserves something like that. No one ever deserves to cry their eyes out wondering why they weren't good enough. NO ONE DESERVES THAT. I should have known better I shouldn't have acted like a child and hurt someone like that I should have never been so fuckin selfish and only caring about my feeling. I should have never been so mean and evil. Maybe I am Satan. Maybe I don't deserve love and friends... I am trying my best here. I'm sorry I disappoint a lot....
Boone Jackson Maher I am in love with you, and I am never, ever going to do something like that to hurt you again. You mean more than anything to me. You are so so so so so perfect... you have no idea. My baby boy... MINE.