(A little steamy chapter - just thought you should let you know-'; Enjoy!)
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Melissa
What do you say after you have been kissed?
"Aaaaw guys, as much as all this is cute, get a room," I could not help but be thankful to Jess this time, as she saved me from confronting the awkward situation between Max and me.
I precipitously tried to put a distance between the two of us by turning around but seem like Max had other plans as his grip on me tightened.
That wasn't all, though. Max proceeded to bury his head in hair, smiling.
"Ah... um, Jess, what you are doing here?" I asked the first thing that came to my mind.
¨Oh, right, I came to see you,¨ But her face told me that she came for another thing, preferably the money that Max promised.
"Hey, beautiful, mind if I go now. I still have to pick up my mom today," Max spoke against my neck, his breath tickling my skin.
"Oh, It's okay,¨ I smiled, turning around to face him with a smile.
Max smiled back at me tenderly, which made me feel like there were light feathers caressing my heart. I tiptoed, giving him a light peck on his cheek, before stepping back a little.
¨Be safe, and call me when you reach home,¨ I added, which resulted in him kissing me on the lips, freezing me on my spot, unable to react until he was out of sight.
A smile made it on my face as my hand unconsciously touched my lips.
¨Ahem! What a lovely PDA that was. Poor Andy could not take it anymore and left.¨ Jess's voice brought me back to reality, which reminded me of the reason why everything happened.
¨What do you mean by that, Jess?¨ I asked, skimming around, but no sign of Andy.
"You know Andy likes, yet you decided to kiss your boyfriend in front of him. That's too mean even for you, Melissa," she continued. I don't know if it was me, but did she sound bitter and accusive?
¨Do I need to ask for his permission to do what I want with my boyfriend,¨
I sighed and started toward the house. I was getting more annoyed with how Jess was making things sound like I was the villain.
"That is not what I mean. But you should have seen the hurt on his face. Even if you don't like him, you should at least consider his feeling and be a little more reserved about your PDA.¨ Jess continues her righteous thought, making me halt and turn to her.
¨Remind me why we are having this talk, again?¨ I crossed my arms across my chest, waiting for her to reply.
¨Why are you being hostile towards me? I am only telling you my thoughts on this matter. We have grown with Andy, and I think he should come first before Max, the guy you barely know. You can't let him destroy your...¨
¨Please stop it!¨ I raised my hands, stopping her pointless speech.
¨I already told Andy that I like him just as a friend. Nothing more. And about my boyfriend, it should not concern any of you. He is not turning me against anyone, so you should stop whatever this is." I was tired of the same topic over and over again. I already made things clear with Andy, but he wouldn't just bulge.
I know what I did, has hurt him, but he needed to get over it. I like him as a friend, nothing more. As much as I tried to see him more than a friend, it didn't happen. There was no attraction.
¨Alright, I will stop.¨ She let out a resigned sigh before her eyes lightened up.
¨So tell me, how was the kiss? It must have been one hell of an experience. I mean, I saw it and could not help but imagine his soft, supple lips on mine.¨ Jess said dreamily.
And just like that, my mood turned sour. I really wanted to share my experience with Jessica. I wanted to let it out. But could I really?
Was she serious? Okay, I know we are not really dating, but Jess didn't know that. Then why would she even think like that? Not to mention loud too.
She was supposed to be my friend, and friends don't daydream about their friend's lovers. She must have noticed her mistake and my expression since she quickly composed herself. Smiling sheepishly at me, she looked any but me.
¨Just an innocent thought," She said. But the question was;
Was it?
¨Here is your money.¨ I reached for my purse and gave her the money promised by Max. ¨I think it's late, and you should leave.¨ I did not wait for her reply as I entered the house, banging close the door in the process.
The nerve of her.
I tried to act normal, but I was far from it. I mean, every time I close my eyes, that scene would keep replaying in my mind on loop. I would find myself touching my lips, smiling, and even dancing in the air, dazing in and out most of the time.
I have been kissed! My first kiss. This thought only was enough to have me blush furiously, bury my head in the pillow, and scream in delight. It may sound cheesy, but there were fireworks. His lips were so soft. He applied the right amount of pressure and smelled so good. I remember how my body jumped into overdrive and released a burst of adrenaline.
It's like that 'fight or flight.
It was like I could hear his heartbeat. My mind went blank, the butterflies in my stomach and the nervousness. I squealed again on the pillow, feeling giddiness and embarrassment washing over me. If Bibi noticed my unusual behaviour, she pretended not to, and I was thankful.
Okay, I know that It was my first kiss but was it supposed to feel this good? The way he kissed me was full of passion. Like it wasn't just for show but to prove that...
Okay, whatever. I needed to sleep.
But how could I bring myself to sleep?
All I did was toss and turn. And when sleepiness finally won, I dreamt of only him. His smile, his signature smirk, his eyes, and mischievousness.
I am going crazy
What is happening to me?
Luckily, morning finally came. I was seated on the couch, zoning off as it has become another new habit since twenty-four hours ago. A shadow from the door caught my eyes, and when I looked to see who the intruder was, my blood froze.
"Haze," I breathed, watching him intently as he made his way towards me.
"What are you doing here?" I managed to ask, standing on my feet.
"I am here to see you.¨ He replied, looking at me heatedly.
¨And...¨ He drawled, his hand reaching for my skin, caressing it tenderly. My breath hitched as I unconsciously leaned in his touch.
¨Hopefully, start where we left," He finished, his face inching closer toward me. I didn't want to make up things in my head, but if I remembered correctly, the last thing we did the other day was a kiss. Was he here to kiss me again?
Slowly his hand cupped my cheeks as his thumb teased my lip softly, making my heart flutter and my legs go weak.
¨Haze,¨ I called out for him, but it sounded like a whimper. I was yet to be kissed, but his touch was already turning into a mess. It was like he heard nothing, as the next moment, he pulled me into a fiery and passionate kiss, killing every rationality I had left.
My hands worked their way around his body, feeling each crevasse, each line along, with his perfect physique.
I don't know how or when we reached my bedroom, but I felt myself lying on the mattress, him on top of me. I felt his hand venture over my body, exploring. He kissed my neck slowly, causing small tremors to rake through my body, running his hand down my side.
My insides craved his touch. I craved his touch. As soon as his moist, plump lips imprinted on my neck, I lost all rational thought. I was just consumed at the thought of him and me showing our ever-growing love for each other. I was amazed at how one touch of his lips could hitch my breath.
We pulled apart, staring at each other, deep into each other's eyes. Max's full of wonder and love, mine full of curiosity and passion. No words were spoken, but a story worthy of us was communicated.
"Mel," I heard him say, which made me frown. He always calls me Beautiful or Bello, then why my name today, especially when we were this intimate.
"Habibi!" this time, it was different. Max's voice was different. My eyes snapped open, shocked to see myself on the bed, with no sign of Max or him being there.
The worst part is that Bibi was staring at me, eyes wide.
A series of cursed filled my mind as realization hit me like a tsunami.
Did. I. just. Dreamt. Of. That!
Dread, shock, and anxiety all came like an unpredicted storm filling my being.
"Oh, my little Habibi has really grown up.¨ Bibi's voice snapped from the anxiety that was about to consume me whole.
¨I can't believe you have such a dream..."
"Bibi, stop.¨ I furiously shook my head.
No, this is not happening.
¨I wasn't having any kind of dream or that of the sort. Only nightmare." It had to be a nightmare. How can I possibly dream of that?
"Really?" Bibi frowned at me.
"That's strange. I mean, when I first came here, I thought you were having a nightmare but then the voices you were making were of ple..."
"Just stop it, Bibi!" I closed my ears using my hands and shut my eyes.
Oh no, I wished the ground would open up and swallow me alive. This was worse. Everything was a mess.
"Oh, baby, don't be shy.¨ Bibi cooed, taking a seat on my bed next to me.
¨It isn't a bad thing to dream about that kind of stuff. Sex dreams are normal that everyone must go through.
It shows that you are becoming a woman and that you have sexual feelings towards the one you were dreaming of." she stubbornly continued, turning a blind eye to what I was feeling at the moment.
I didn't want to listen to her anymore. Couldn't she just see that I was already embarrassed?
"Sometimes, I even wonder if you are my Bibi or my sister," I snapped and ran outside. How could she talk like that? Like everything was fine when it was not.
How can my dreaming of Max, in that way, help me?
I was running, and I didn't know where to, but I just wanted to get away from Bibi - mostly from myself. I was confused about everything. I know that I and max were in a mutual agreement, that we had become friends, and he only kissed me to chase away Andy, but one thing was for certain;
What I feel for him is more than friendship, and that scares me the most.
I like the feeling but not as much as I hated it. I couldn't like Max. But I already did, much more than I should be.
I was still battling with my thoughts when I bumped into a solid wall -technically not a wall - but a human body.
It was Andy. Without even looking, I could tell it was him.
"Mel, are you okay?" he asked with concern, his hand holding my shoulders.
"Yes am okay. Good morning," I answered, faking a smile that did not reach my eyes.
"I don't think so. You look... pale like you have been crying."
"No, Andy. I am just having a bad morning. That's all,¨ I gave him my best smile and tried to walk past him, but he stopped me.
"No, you are not Okay. Did anything happen?" Andy asked, searching my eyes.
Of course, I wasn't okay. Far from, okay.
"Did that jerk do anything to you?" his expression suddenly changed to that of anger. His hands-on shoulder tightened.
"What?¨ I was confused by his hostile question but later realized he was talking about Max.
¨No, of course not,"
"You know you can trust me, Mel. That guy isn't good,"
"Andy..."
"No, Mel, I am serious, he can't be trusted at all, and he is a ladies' man, for goodness sake.¨
"Andy enough!" I could not take it anymore. His words describing Max did nothing but fuel my frustrations further. I was angry at him, at Jessica, and myself because I knew they were telling the truth. Max was everything he described, but to me, he wasn't. I was guilty as him. We were both using each other.
"So what if he was like that? That was before he met me. Whatever he did in the past should not affect what we have now in the present, Andy."
"Why are you being so difficult, Melissa? You do not know Max the way I do. That guy is gonna hurt you." Andy insisted, shaking me by the shoulder, which I did not like.
"Then let him!" I yelled, shrugging his hands off me.
¨Let him hurt me then! It is my life, my choice, and my decision to be with him. I do not need you to worry about that.¨ I took in a couple of deep breaths, calming myself down.
¨Andy, know you are only trying to look out for me, and I really appreciate it. But I love Max already, and there is no backing down. So if him hurting me will be the price I have to pay, then let it be. Please don't make this harder. Andy." I know I sounded like a stupid girl in love, maybe drunk in love, but I had to stop him from trying.
"Sorry, I have to go back. Bibi must be looking for me." with that, I headed back to the house. I was welcomed with Bibi's porridge evading my nose like its sanctuary. I suddenly felt bad for walking out on her, especially when she was only trying to make me feel good.
"Bibi," I called out to her, my head down in shame.
"Already calmed down?" she quirked her eyebrow at me.
"I guess," I sighed, taking a seat.
"I am sorry about this morning. I did not mean to walk out on you. Just a little embarrassed you had to witness that." I added.
"It's okay, I understand you," she said, handing me a cup of porridge then I followed to the sitting room.
"You do like the gentleman, don't you," Bibi spoke after a moment of silence. It was supposed to be a question but sounded like a statement.
It made me ponder for a while. Games and lies aside. That was indeed a good question. Did I really like Max, or was it just an infatuation?
Okay, Mel, let's take you to some little interview with yourself.
Does he make me feel good?
Yes, he does!
Do I think about them a lot?
Heck just had an intimate dream about him today!
What do I like about them?
I like everything about him, nothing to dislike.
Do I want to tell him when good or bad things happen to me?
Always.
And the conclusion...
"Yes," I breathed, my heart beating first than usual.
"I like him so much, Bibi.¨ I smile, looking at nothing in particular.
¨He makes me feel things that are foreign to me. Makes me smile, makes me feel special," I am sure I was smiling like a lovesick puppy.
Bibi sighed and smiled at me.
"That's good to hear, but the better question is, does he feel the same about you?" I felt a pin drop in my stomach, quenching painfully, afraid to even ask myself that question.
I almost laughed at myself. Who would have thought that I, Melissa, would one day find myself trapped in unrequited love? It was not love - thank goodness - just a simple like, but,
But was he that of a good actor? Faking, his touches, the way he looked at me, kissed me. He possibly could not be falsifying all those, right? He just felt something for me, right?
'Sorry if I led you on. As much as I find you hot and everything, you are not my type, not even close. I toy around with any girl who allows me to, so hold your horses, Melissa. You are not special.'
I swallowed painfully as my brain chose to bring about that memory and forced myself to answer Bibi's question.
"Yes, he does." I tried shaking off the question that was starting to eat my mind alive.
"I mean, I can't read his mind, but I can feel it. He won't be able to stand my dramas if he did not," I gave Bibi a reassuring smile before taking a sip from my cup.
I really wanted to know what Max felt towards me. Even if it was a little attraction, that would be enough for me.
Confronting Max was out of the question, so I went to the only person I knew who might help me get the answers. The only person that I considered friend enough to pour my heart into.
"Hello, Nicky!" I excitedly greeted her when she answered the phone.
"Hi Besty, how are you?" Never has the name best sounded so genuine, not even from Jess.
"I doing alright,¨ I paused nervously before adding, ¨Um, Nicky, are you free today?"
"Aha, let's see, I have a unit at 11, another at 12, maybe at 5. That's when I will be free. Why?"
"Oh, that will be too late already. Okay, let me just tell you now.¨ I took a deep breath and closed my eyes before dropping the bomb.
"Max kissed me yesterday."