I have absolutely no clue what she is talking about so I just stay quiet. At this point I do and don't want to know because I can sense that whatever is happening is going to change everything between us.
Lisa: If you remember last year I applied for that study abroad program and I got wait listed because of the number of applicants there were?
I do remember that because Lisa was really sad when she received the later stating that she could only go if some else dropped out or didn't accept. We end up going for ice cream where I made her laugh and talked about how they were crazy for wait listing her. We also made plans for if she did get it. I could and should have already graduated with as many credits as I have but I've been taking extra advance classes so I could walk with Lisa and Tish. However since Tish signed up for a 6 year program we were always going to graduate before her.
Shae: Yeah I remember...
Lisa: Well I found out 2 days after our argument that someone left... they told me I can take to spot if I wanted. I accepted right then when they called because I was so excited. I'm sorry... I've been trying to figure out how to tell you... or even if I would go. I want to go Shae, I've always wanted to go...
At this point Lisa is now crying and I'm just sitting here stunned. I didn't expect this, but this sucks and is also great, and it also sucks.
Shae: Then you have to go...
I know I sound bland and like it doesn't matter, when it really really does, but I'm so shocked right now that I don't know what else to say. Did she even think to ask if I wanted to come. It's not that she had to, but with all the plans we made when it first came up and now she's talking like it's only her... I wonder.
Lisa: Shae... I- I....
Shae: I get it Lisa, this has been a dream of yours since you heard about it. You should go, im not going to be the one that keeps you from pursuing this. I'll go to my advisor and let her know that I'll walk with next class and then I'll get a job and work until the lease is up.
I don't say anything about us because she hasn't, as far as I'm concerned right now she hasn't mentioned it so it's not important.