"Oh, I see. "
[I will fulfill my promise to you, but not you who will do all those things. Therefore, keep holding on until death picks you up again. ]
"what do you mean ?."
[You'll understand after this, I'll go first. ]
Along with his departure, my consciousness began to fade.
My body sinks deeper and deeper into the ocean.
***
After walking for a while, I arrived at the beach; I contemplated here facing such a complicated problem.
Sitting alone while enjoying the sea breeze was like being freed from everything that made me tired.
There weren't many people here because from the start most people who lived here didn't have this kind of free time.
Just continuing to work to make ends meet is a daily thing we have to go through.
"Now, what should I do. I've been fired from my job; it might take a little while when I get a new job. "
Talking to the moving waves became my usual hobby.
"Paying for my mother's treatment, and bringing in the rent, and looking for food for the next few weeks. It seems my days are going to get tougher. "
I felt like crying, but it would mean I was admitting defeat to my fate if I did.
As a man and a child who must be devoted to his parents, I have to show that I can be the family's breadwinner.
Taking my anger out on nature is indeed a delightful thing; it prevents me from getting angry for no reason, even though I sometimes feel depressed because of the monotonous routine of my life.
In my heart, I wanted a new situation. I want to be happy, but circumstances can't make me do it. There are times I want to disappear, but if I disappear. Who will take care of my parents later?
All my relatives are irresponsible people; they only care about our money. When you no longer have money. They all just left with no desire to help one another.
I can only depend on my friends; getting friends to confide in is pleasing to get rid of the evil thoughts in my head.
Therefore, I must know. I only have my mother as my reason to live; that alone is enough to keep me going for tomorrow.
"I think now my condition is fine; I'd instead buy my mother's favorite food than spend time on useless things like this. "
Before that, I felt something strange. When I reached for my smartphone, I got a message from my best friend. It seems he invited me to come to his house.
I better go there.
Some time passed, I arrived at his door. Then, I rang the doorbell.
"Alright, wait a minute. "
A familiar voice came from inside the house. Then, the door opened. I saw a middle-aged woman greet me.
"Rainier, you have come, huh. Herman told me you would indeed come. "
"Sorry if I disturbed you. "
"No-no, I'm happy if my son's friend comes here. Come on in; he's upstairs. "
"Yes, thank you very much. "
After that, I entered Herman's house. Then, I just walked to his room.
When I saw him, he seemed to be engrossed in watching anime.
"So, why did you call me here? "
"Ah, you finally came, Rainier. Look at this; I just got the news that the second season of the love story of a goddess and a human will air next season, definitely adapting the volume of the very famous novel. "
"Uh? "
"Yes, from now on, be careful. There will be a lot of spoilers hanging around. "
"It wouldn't have happened if I had been exposed to spoilers first. "
I sat on Herman's bed.
"Have you read the latest volume? "
"No, I haven't read it. I don't have the money to buy it."
"Then just read mine. You can take it home or enjoy it while taking a break from work. "
"Yeah, I'll borrow it. "
I also took one of the light novels that we both liked. Being able to hold the physical book already made me happy.
"You can return it whenever you want. "
"Why do you always say that? I will return it as soon as I read everything. "
"I'm not a collector of items like that; it will be much more fun when I talk to other people, especially my close friends like you. "
Seeing her smile full of enthusiasm because of the ease in her life sometimes makes me jealous.
"Why can you always smile like this? Do you just keep on imagining your days? "
"Of course, it's like that because, without it, I won't be able to work on my commission project. "
"whatever. "
Herman William is a high school classmate of mine, his work as a freelance illustrator of manga or light novels, he is indeed very talented in that.
"At least, buying Akafuyu a 1:1 action figure is one of my dreams. "
"Just make it yourself; after all, how much money does it take for you to buy it. "
"Of course, I don't know because no one made it. However, keeping hope is something I can do. "
"I hope so...."
It's a sentence that always makes me rethink my fate.
"That's the part of you that I don't like; why can't you smile. Continuing to put on a severe face like that will only make other people feel afraid of you. "
"Does my face look weird? "
"It's extraordinary; you look like an uncle stalker who targets young girls in a school complex. "
"Why am I the villain? "
"So, change that part. "
Then, Herman returned to color his work.
The door to his room was opened; Herman's mother came here bringing me food and drinks.
"There's only this thing; I hope Rainier can enjoy it. "
"Please forgive me for bothering you. "
"You don't need to apologize like that; it's Herman who should apologize because he who called you instead allowed you to be silent like this. "
Herman's mother's sharp gaze seemed to pierce her son.
"Mom, you came when I wasn't talking to her. You should know I'm taking care of my work. "
"I thought you ignored Rainier's arrival. "
"If I intend to ignore him, why should I bother inviting him here. Previously, the mother said that after cooking the crab, you could bring it here. "
"Ah, that's right, I remember. Please wait a minute, Rainier; I'll bring it here. "
"no..."
"Don't refuse. "
With that said, I couldn't deny it anymore.
Then, Herman's mother just left.
"There's no point in you refusing my mother; all you have to do is accept it. "
"You shouldn't have to do that because I don't think I deserve all these things. "
"Why do you always think like that if I say like this. That means you are my friend, can't I entertain my best friend with everything I have? "
"I find it strange if you are this good. You should have far more friends than you should treat me like that because I…."
"Enough, this is my decision. To me, they are nothing more than two-faced people, so I wouldn't consider such people to be friends. "
"I'm just like them; why do you keep saying that excuse. "
"Of course, because I apply double standards, that way I can be calm when talking to people I trust. "
It seems that whatever reason I say, he will answer immediately. What I think, I think this is a form of happiness that God gave me. It would be much better if I didn't ask further.
"Okay, I won't say that any further. "
"I will always win if we talk about it, hahaha. "
Herman is a strange person, but maybe because we are both weird people. We can get to know each other.
Then, Herman's mother returned with a tray containing two giant bowls.
"Please enjoy Rainier, but you need to be careful when eating it so as not to make Herman's room smell terrible. "
"Yeah, I'll try not to cause trouble. "
"I'm just kidding, just eat in your easiest way. Then Herman, after this, helps a mother to lift the shelf. "
"Yes, after this, I will go down. "
Right after hearing the answer from her son, Herman's mother immediately went downstairs.
"I think I'll have a hard time eating it. "
"My mom cooks it tenderly, so don't worry. "
"I see; I think I'm troublesome. "
"I told you not to say that just enjoy the food my mother gave me. We don't feel that way. "
Then, Herman stood up to get something from his refrigerator.
It seems he brought me another meal.
"hora.."
When he threw the snack, I just caught it.
"This is too much; I'm not sure I can eat it all alone. "
"We'll eat together; then I'll come down for a bit. "
"Yes. "
After that, Herman went down to help his mother. As for me, I was just lying there reading the light novel he lent me.
I have a pretty unique habit if I'm too focused on reading something. So, I won't listen to any sounds around me; Herman said that I have a very high level of focus. Some people even say that I give off a kind of aura that indicates don't talk to me when I'm focused.
Sometimes I don't understand why they can talk like that. However, I can consider this a blessing because I don't have to bother using a headset with a noise-canceling system to enjoy what I'm reading.
Suddenly, my head was hit by the book. It broke my concentration again.
"Remember, you haven't eaten the food at all. "
"Uh, you're back? very fast. "
"It's not me who is fast, but you who enjoy reading the novel too much. Look, you've got about 47 pages. "
"Uh, it's already this much..."
"That's why you won't be able to enjoy it properly if it's like that. "
"That's right; I have to restrain myself. "