Eliot had to ready himself. He most certainly can't greet anyone looking like a rat that crawled out of the sewage. He also had a few things to prepare for tomorrow. He scuttled off home to the Angel's Orchid Orphanage. Despite its embarrassing name, the Angel's Orchid Orphanage was quite the hypocritical surprise. When Eliot first came here, he fit in well with the local kids. He quickly grasped the religious concepts of the Gods but was not one to believe them so quickly. Neither did the priests.
The orphanage is being shut down due to complications. An investigation was done after overwhelming complaints from the locals. They were complaining because of the 'recent' string of crimes. People would find that things would disappear from their homes, but the locks on their doors were still tight. Confusing as it was, the police investigated and found nothing about the crimes. What they did find however was that the Angel's Orchid Orphanage was unlicensed and financial records incomplete.
The public will never know just the extent of what happened, nor will the police, but as far as they can tell, something fishy was going on. After all not only were there apparent ghost children that had records but were nowhere in sight, there was also a whole dungeon found beneath the church, right under the Goddess of Peace's statue. Now, most believe that the orphanage was a guise for its criminal activities. Unfortunately who were doing the crimes couldn't be explicitly stated.
Of course, Eliot knew all about this, nor was he ever going to tell people what had happened. He couldn't risk his perfect resume for an apathetic public with an attention span shorter than a toddler. Nor could he afford to care.
Eliot didn't care that the public didn't know what had happened, the fact that it had happened proves that they don't deserve to know as much as they claim. Them knowing wouldn't help the situation anyway.
Maybe it's because of the orphanage, but Eliot learned the importance of information from a young age. Not everyone can just walk into the royal library, and even if they could, what's the chance that they can understand what the books are saying. You'd just be better off using the books as weapons, chucking them to scare off those severely underdressed maids always missing some vital pieces of clothing. Those things belong to the mind and its fantasies, not reality. If it's reality you know they have an agenda. The point is, you need knowledge to know more knowledge. Like knowing how to scare off maid predators. You need to know that these maids exist by reading any haram ever, before you can know how to get rid of them.
Eliot was scuttling home in style. From head to toe, he was an unwelcome mess. The poop on his head extended all the way from his back to his ears. He was holding what can only be described as a poop nugget in his hand. It was once his shoe. While missing a shoe on his foot, he was leaving a blood trail wherever he went, his shoeless foot bleeding through his sock from walking on the cobblestone road. He was the fright to behold. Dressed up for his date with a bath. People avoided him like a plague. Even the beggars looked disgusted. It was an all-new low.
Other than loudmouth Milo, who Eliot will always blame no matter what, Eliot could only blame the soldiers for his unfortunate circumstances. He's seen what those soldiers put down their throats. They're practically treating their stomachs like trash cans. They also have an extensive reputation for accidentally eating the beer mugs a while in after drinking.
Eliot hastened his pace a bit once he walked past the major shops and into a more 'untamed shortcut'. Although he was confident that the putrid waft would scare off the majority of his problems. Eliot glanced at the eyes leering from the shadows. Some of them drooling.
As far as he was concerned they would stay put as long as you don't make it easy for them. Other people, on the other hand, someone with at least 9IQ and an understanding of how to use their fists, are the ones Eliot was out on the watch for.
Spotting a strand of smoke leaking from an alleyway, Eliot grinned, he found one.
As if possessed, Eliot instantly changed his character. He took out his earnings from his pocket and strutted right up to the alleyway. He *tripped* on a rock and his cash was flying everywhere for the world to see.
"How could this day get any worse?"
Eliot only started to pick up his money when a voice echoed from the alleyway.
"I suggest you leave that there."
Acting confused, Eliot looked left and right, staring straight down the alleyway, before fearlessly continuing to pick up his money. This time with a much faster pace.
"I said leave it there!"
Eliot ignored the man and finished picking up his money.
An enormous hunk of a man stepped into the light with a cigarette between his fingers. He was clearly disgusted by the smell coming off Eliot.
"I SAID LEAVE IT!"
Eliot startled and confused looked left and right again. Eliot pointed at himself with a shaky finger.
"You were talking to me?"
Surprised the man replied, "Yeah, who else you dingus?"
Eliot sniffed and then burst out in tears.
"It's just that, nobody wanted to talk to me because I'm dirty. They even said mean things. Thank you sir, you truly made my day today"
Eliot then rushed closer and hugged the man.
"How can I ever thank you for what you did
for me. I could never repay the favour."
Eliot wiped away his snot and tears on the man's shirt and left poop stains everywhere. He wiped off his foot on the man's jeans. Then he rushed off with the man's wallet that he just brazenly took out of the man's pocket and disappeared around a corner.
Stunned the man just stood there stupified. He was left in the dust still processing what on earth just happened.
Eliot on the other was already making his way to his next victim...
After a successful few hunts, Eliot appeared before the orphanage. He wasn't looking as bad since he used the thugs as cloths, but nevertheless looked like something straight out of a horror movie. The first thing he noticed were the officers lurking around the place just drooling to catch a child. Thankfully the kids knew what to do. Every time a cop came up to them to ask 'just a few questions' they would run off screaming, "A blue monkey!" or just the boring round of the mill "stranger danger". But boy, did they make Eliot proud.
Insults are art and the children didn't shy away from getting creative. First, the children had a friendly chat on how they could improve their insults, then it turned into a competition, then an all-out fight. Unfortunately, their capable little mind caught up with them and they just started spewing nonsense, but it worked anyway. Usually, a few insults would scare away a cop, but later the cops started chasing the children. The kids then teamed up in groups and threw the police with rocks, which progressed to multiple policemen teaming up and charging in. The children responded with multiple of their teams teaming up together.
Every time the police charged a team of children they would quickly split up and be swallowed by multiple surrounding teams of children, until their teams got too big and vulnerable for multiple police teams to charge together. The children learned to split the teams up once it got too big to avoid that from happening. The police realised this and tried only chasing after one child and when the group split up. The children responded with multiple surrounding groups of children surrounding an unfortunate group of kids being charged at by a police team and pummeled the police team with rocks from all sides until the children could reach the next team of children and be swallowed up. If a police officer did manage to catch a child the children would zoom in on the single police officer with rocks. It got complicated as the war progressed fast. And Eliot quietly slipped past it.
Eliot appeared in the big hallway that ran straight through the middle of the orphanage. The children that didn't recognize him immediately cried and those that did quickly scooted over and waved him on with bright smiles. It was a strange scene.
Not taking it to mind he hurried down the hall. But as he was hurrying along he walked past the kitchen and stopped in his tracks.
It looked like there was a horde of monkeys jumping up and down and unpacking the whole kitchen. Eliot peeked in and saw the children were packing all the food in bags.
One of them spotted Eliot's head popping in from the wall. It took him a second to recognise Eliot with his new brown hair gel.
"Eliot!"
But once he did recognise him, he quickly approached Eliot.
Eliot looked at Brennan acrobatically jumping between children and furniture and just the general mess. He jumped from table to table and stopped just in time for a tomato to almost scratch his nose as it flew past. He jumped down and skipped over a few children before coming to a stop before Emory.
"How was that for elegance?"
Eliot rolled his eyes.
"You will never be elegant."
"Lies!"
Eliot felt his throat burn. Maybe it's PTSD, but he wouldn't dare to go down this argument again. Last time he ended up losing his voice from all the back and forth screaming. So instead, Eliot ignored Brennan's very wrong claims and instead focused on what was going on.
"You guys are really quick, huh?"
"Yeah, we started as soon as the staff were taken in for questioning. We want to take as much as we can before they throw us out."
"And the rest of the staff? Surely the police wouldn't question all the staff at the same time?"
Brennan snickered, "You'd be surprised how many did get taken in, we prepared for much more. Thankfully we pooled our money together to buy some sleeping drugs. Lily poured in some other fun things as well. Bless her soul. They won't be standing up until tomorrow, and they wouldn't be doing so in a hurry."
"I saw the police outside"
"Yeah, they came faster than we anticipated, they also got violent rather quick, it seems like someone really wants to solve this case quickly. Thankfully we had months of preparation, so we won't fall quick."
Eliot eyed the pile of already packed bags.
"It doesn't look like much though."
"Yeah, and I was thinking that they'd stock their fridges before the police came to inspect the place, but it seems like they are really holding onto that money."
Eliot sighed, maybe he was being too hopeful thinking that those criminals would try to keep the place as long as possible. It seems like they completely gave up on it.
Eliot handed all the Brennan all the wallets he stole from the thugs.
"I got myself quite the reputation getting these."
Brennan's eyes widened with surprise.
"Are you going to be fine? It's a lot of wallets, they won't come after you will they?"
"Of course they will. I just won't be here when that happens."
Brennan glanced suspiciously at Eliot. Was he going out of town forever after this?
Brennan on the other hand was counting and recounting the bags, making sure that everything was still working as it should. Between all the food, they had already started packing the more expensive things like the head priest's golden chalice and some silver-plated chandelier parts. They were taking this place apart. Brennan held in his hands a very beautiful cross.
"You think the authorities will try to track down some of the stuff?"
Eliot glanced around the place.
"They won't know if we do it well. Father Agustin already took all the actual expensive things. The rest were just for the image. The orphanage is just a pretty husk. The authorities won't give a damn. All you need to worry about is your future. Bigger kids like us will be kicked out the first chance they get. My bets are on anyone above 9 will be forced to the streets."
"I know."
There was a moment of hesitant silence before Brennan finally spoke up.
"Can I go with you? You're going out of town right? Let's go adventuring or something fun. Or start a shop, join the army. There's still a billion things I still want to do with you."
Eliot could see Brennan wasn't just asking right now for the sake of it. His eyes were genuinely pleading Eliot.
Eliot sighed, "I'm sorry Brennan, I already have an appointment with the Magic Academy."
"You got in!?"
Brennan's eyes widened as shock filled his face. He knew Eliot sent his application in a while back, but didn't connect the dots. After all, what orphan gets into magic school? The excitement quickly died down and was replaced by a tinge of sadness.
"You won't come with me?"
Having a feeling that this might go somewhere serious, Eliot pulled Brennan over to a vacant room. He held Brennan's soldiers firmly and looked him straight in the eyes.
"Brennan I found something I want to do. Something I really, really, really wholeheartedly want to do. And I wish I can take you with me, but I can't."
Brennan avoided eye contact.
Eliot sighed. Despite this guy's annoying act of ignorance, his absolutely awful personality and talent of getting under people's skin, he was smart and quick to break. A lethal combination.
From out of his pocket, Eliot took out a necklace. It was silver and had beautiful patterns mapped out on it. It didn't seem to form any shape or image but nevertheless looked like a masterpiece.
"Brennan even though I can't come with you, I can give you this. Keep it hostage and keep it safe. Once I meet you again give it to me."
Brennan held it trembling
"How can you give me this? Wasn't it your mother's?"
Eliot smiled, "I'm glad you like it."
Brennan didn't dare to wipe his tears, afraid he might drop the trinket. He held it with both hands and carefully placed it in his front pocket.
"Also you'll need to wash your clothes after this."
Brennan looked at his shoulder where Eliot held. There was now a small outline of a hand.
Brennan gasped, "I forgot you were covered in poop."
Eliot nodded, "Me too."
Brennan burst out laughing and handed Eliot a key.
"Have fun. Don't forget about tonight."
"Thanks"
They bid each other farewell and Eliot disappeared into the hallway.
Eliot arrived in front of a big intimidating door. It was Father Agustin's room. Eliot reached out for the lock and slowly fit in the key that Brennan gave him. First, there was a small resistance, to which Eliot responded by wiggling the key. There was a click. He slowly turned the key. There was a second click. And the door opened.
Eliot found probably the most luxurious room throughout the whole town. The orphanage was first a really big church, before a section of it was turned into an orphanage. It was built even before the Phathlonial people inhabited these lands. Not to mention it's been three eras of kingdoms since. As you can imagine, a lot of important people in the old days came to visit it. This room is rumoured to be the VIP room of VIP rooms.
The sun leaked in through a window, thousands of objects peered back. Shiny cups, bejewelled cutlery sets, beautifully patterned wallpaper. Soft floors. Slick furniture. It had everything. But most importantly it was warm. Eliot felt embraced when he walked in. He felt warm inside as the sun shone on his bare neck.
Amazed, Eliot made his way to the bathroom. The bathroom was massive. It was more of a sauna than a bathroom. It had marble walls and white tiles leading to a wondrously large bath in the floor. It could fit in at least two adults. To his surprise, it was already filled with steaming hot water. Without thinking much, Eliot climbed into the bath, clothes and all, after removing what was in his pockets of course.
He got off all the poop, but his shoes were unsalvageable. Eliot just sighed and put them aside. He already cut his losses at the tavern once the shoe fell in the poop. Eliot just refocused on his task and picked up the soap, unsure of what to do with it. It's been so long since he had a proper clean bath, that he almost forgot how soap worked. Usually, he would just use vinegar as a replacement and do with flowers what he can to rid him of the smell. But now he has an assortment of cleaning products laying before him. He would be damned if he didn't try out every single one.
But first, he climbed back out and refilled the bath, because he absolutely refused to sit and soak in a bath full of poop. The bath had a neat mechanism that refilled the bath on its own. It was convenient.
After some struggle and a half Eliot finally could start what he actually came here for. He experimented with the cleaning products like he was a baby. He threw in everything he could get his hands on. The only thing he didn't touch was the lonely purple perfume bottle in the corner. It was going to be important later. Eliot got down to business. He removed his black wig, revealing long silver hair falling all the way to his knees. He scraped off layers and layers of dirt from his face, revealing the smoothest skin. He washed his eyelashes and eyebrows all back too silver. Finally, he took the lonely perfume hidden behind the rest and held it before him.
"Dearest Father Agustin, today will be a blast."
Eliot smiled sadistically before he put on the perfume. After he was done, he stood in front of the mirror. He lamented at his tiny fifteen figure. He promised himself to get a six-pack after this.
After that Eliot dozed off in the bath and was only awoken by furious footsteps that could be heard further down the hall. The doors swung open and Father Agustin burst through.