Ding
My Facebook alert goes off again. If someone sends me one more Candy Crush request I'm going to block them, I think, clearing the notification.
I hear what sounds like a growl from behind me. I turn my head to look at Bruce, my hair slipping off my shoulder as I do so. He's sitting on the chair behind me, just staring at me while I lie on the floor, playing with my iPad. He sits with his long legs extended out before him, reminding me how crazy tall he is. The top button of his shirt is undone, and he looks more laid-back than normal. He's been doing it all day; just watching me.
His green eyes bore into me, his jaw clenched tight, a five o'clock shadow showing on his face. I roll my eyes, going back to searching for a new book to read, browsing the selections. I know he wants to ask, because he asked the last three times my iPad dinged. He wants to know who's messaging me, mistaking the game dings as actual messages. I didn't correct him, and each time I just ignored his question, playing into what he's thinking.
I like seeing the jealousy on his face. I liked it even more when Bryan showed up and asked me to lunch. When I went to get my purse, Bruce followed me, informing me that if I went to lunch, Bryan wouldn't make it out of the building with me. It was a completely barbaric thing for him to say, and I pretended to be offended.
I wasn't.
I joked that maybe we didn't have to leave the building, and that I could just go back to his place and eat. I couldn't tell from the look in Bruce's eyes if he was serious about hurting Bryan, and it was messed up for me to lead Bryan on. So I went to the door and told him I'd forgotten I had something to do, but not before he gave me his number. All of which Bruce saw.
Shows him. You don't see me snapping at him every time his phone goes off, asking if it's Holly or someone else. I'm starting to notice that the more I ignore him, the crazier it drives him. Maybe he is crazy. First, he wanted me as far away as possible and got angry when I threw myself at him. Now I'm keeping my distance and he's stuck to my ass. I can't leave a room without him following me, making up some reason why he needs to be in that room too.
I tried to escape to my room for a little, but he found reason after reason to come in—from checking the smoke detector batteries to making sure the hot water in the bathroom didn't come on too hot to testing all the light sockets to make sure they were working. It was beyond ridiculous. Now I just find myself moving from room to room so he'll follow. Chase me.
I like it. Hell, who am I kidding? I fucking love it. Suck it, Holly. He isn't following you room to room like a cute grumpy puppy. I wonder if I ignore him long enough he'll pee in my room, or chew up my shoes just to get my attention. A bark of laughter escapes me, thinking about Bruce doing those things.
"What's so funny?" he asks in a tone I know is harder than he intended.
Rolling to my side, I prop my head up with one hand, the rug digging into my elbow. "Don't you have work to do or something?" I ask in a bored voice, trying to provoke him. I know I said I was done chasing him, and I am, but I get a thrill out of getting a reaction from him. I can't seem to stop myself.
"You have no idea how much work I should be doing," he says, running a frustrated hand through his hair.
I was shocked when he didn't go to work today. He kept pulling out his laptop like he was working on it, but every time I looked over at him, his eyes were on me. To make it worse, he didn't even try to pretend he wasn't looking at me. No, he just stared, the look of hunger all over his face.
"Then maybe get on that?" I suggest, hearing him take a deep breath. It sounds like one of defeat.
"I can't. It seems my mind is otherwise occupied." His words hang between us, and I shuffle my legs, letting my dress ride up. Is it sex he wants? Is that all this is? As I try to tease him with my body, his eyes never leave mine. For a second, a look crosses his face; one I've seen in the mirror before. Loneliness. It's easy to spot when you see it on yourself every day. My heart clenches, but then it's gone and his frustration is back.
I fight the urge to crawl over to him and into his lap. Half-scared that he'll just push me away again, I remain still. I can't take the rejection. I told myself I was no longer going to chase. No more throwing myself at people who can't or won't love me back. I want more.
Before I can make a fool out of myself, I get up from the floor, grabbing my iPad. "I think I'll turn in early tonight. Maybe you'll get some work done, or maybe you can go out or something, don't worry about me.."
I'm baiting him to say something, mainly about Holly, but he just nods his head. I give him a soft smile, fighting the disappointment I feel when he won't tell me anything. Or maybe I'm fighting the knot I just put in my own stomach at suggesting he go out for the night. Would he still come to my room tonight if he did? Did I want him to come to my room tonight?
Turning, I make my retreat into my room and throw myself onto my bed.
The answer is yes. Yes, I want him to come to my room again. I won't ask him to, but I want to enjoy these last few days I have with him. I'll be leaving soon. It's for the best. We'll just end up driving each other crazy if I stay any longer than I have to.
I know part of him wants me, but not enough to really have me. I would be nothing more than a dirty secret; something I always felt like I was with my mom. A mistake she made once that could be hidden away. Shuffle me off to boarding school and put me away on a shelf. Bruce would do the same. Stick me in his condo and give me attention when he had the time to do so.
He wouldn't want anyone to know he was sticking it to his step daughter. Even if I gave into coming second to his career, it would all be for nothing. Soon everyone would find out we were together, and I'm sure that would be devastating to the firm. Holly mentioned his going into politics, and that's not a world I was built for. Fake smiles and hellos are not something I want to be a part of. I watched my mother do it, and I despised it. I want real.
I know I'm young, but losing my mother, whom I never really knew, made me think about what I want from life. I don't want to have to do something to please someone else. I want to break the cycle and not get trapped in their kind of life. I want love, a family, bake sales, date nights, fighting over not taking out the stupid trash. God, I relished the idea of having someone to fight with me. Someone who would actually fight back. Not just dismiss me.
For a moment I thought I saw that look in Bruce's eyes. That longing for more, for a connection with another person. Part of me wants to try to show him we could have that too, that we could walk away from all of this. But part of me doesn't want to have to ask for it.
Grabbing my pillow, I pull it under my head and close my eyes. For a moment I think I catch the smell of him. A lingering scent of what we did last night, and for some reason the thought makes me mad. I'm just making this worse for myself. Thinking of and playing with the idea he could be mine. Half-hoping he comes in here again tonight.
Getting up from the bed, I lock my bedroom door. No more silly dreams, Sophie, I think to myself, lying back down on the bed. I close my eyes and try to focus on anything but Bruce.
* * *
I feel him before I see him.
I was fast asleep, and it's pitch black in my room, but I feel his presence. I'm instantly awake, my body coming alive.
Before I can react, the covers are ripped away from me and he's on top of me, blanketing my body. His face is right against mine, and his hard cock digs into my stomach.
"You've been ignoring me all day and I can't stand it. Then you locked your door, hoping to keep me out." The look in his eyes is one I've never seen before, almost like a wild animal. Maybe I pushed too far, but I find myself doing it again.
Get off me, Bruce," I snap, not really wanting him to.
"No. If this is the only way I can get your attention, then this is what I'll do. Now show me your pussy. I need to see it."
I push against him, and he leans up, letting me have a little bit of space. I reach over and turn on the bedside lamp, allowing me to see his face. He looks angry and aggressive. I feel a little bit of pride in the knowledge that I worked him up to this point.
I look down at his body and see he's got on loose shorts, the head of his cock peeking out of the waistband.
"Bruce, go back to your room," I say the words but there's no power behind them. I'm already wet thinking about what he wants to do to me. The way he looks at my pussy when he gets off makes me cum so hard. I want that right now. Even if it's not a good idea, I want it so bad.
He looks down at me and licks his lips, not giving an inch. I'm naked except for a pair of peach-colored cotton panties. I know what he's going to say, and I know I'll show him.
"Let me see it, Sophie," he whispers.
I cream a little at his words and slowly reach down, giving him what we both want. Pulling my panties to the side, I show him my wet pussy and wait for his reaction.
He grunts and slips his hand down to his cock, pulling it out.
My nipples are hard and aching, and I use my other hand to pinch them a little, still holding my panties to the side for his pleasure.
He hovers over me, closer to me than he's ever been when he's done this before. His throbbing cock is only inches away from my virgin pussy.
I ache to have him inside me, filling me with all ten inches. I want him to stretch me and make me fit him. I want to be stuffed full of him: his cock and his cum. The dirty thoughts make my pussy clench.
"Fuck, Sophie. I can see it pulsing. Goddamn, you want it bad, don't you, baby?"
I nod my head, giving in and letting him know how much I want it.
"Maybe just a little tease for both of us?"
"Please, Bruce."
"Shit. Okay, but just for a second."
He leans forward a little, and I watch as the tip of his cock barely touches my opening. Feeling the warm head of his cock against me makes my pussy clench again, and he moans at the feeling.
"Oh, fuck, do that again baby."
He pulls back a little and spreads the wetness on the end of his cock down his shaft, jerking it a few times. He leans back in and puts the head of his cock against me, not pushing in, just holding it there.
I feel his warmth and squeeze my pussy, gently kissing the tip of his dick with my virgin opening.
He jerks back and rubs his cock some more, faster and harder this time. "Fuck, I want to cum in you so bad, but I can't, Sophie."
I'm so turned on and so close to the edge myself, I start to beg. "Please, Bruce. Please. I'm so close."
He lets out a grunt, and leans back against me, touching the head of his dick to my slit again. He still doesn't push in, and it's our only point of contact. It's the only place our bodies are touching, and my body is on fire.
I feel him press in a little, his cock hitting my virgin barrier.
"That's it, Sophie, that's your virginity. I'm going to cum in you without breaking it though. Just squeeze me, like before."
His cock pulses a little, and I can feel his heartbeat between my legs. I squeeze my pussy muscles to the beat. I pinch my nipple, getting closer and closer to the edge.
"Fuck, that's it, baby." He pushes a little more against my hymen but doesn't breach it. I feel his cock swell and start to jerk as he shouts out.
His warm cum splashes inside my virgin pussy, and the feel of him cumming inside me sends me over the edge, my orgasm ripping through me.
As I shout out my release, I feel his mouth latch on to my nipple and I skyrocket to the best orgasm I've ever had. Our only bodily contact is through his cock touching my pussy and his mouth on my nipple, and I cum so hard and long I nearly pass out.
When it's over and I'm trying to catch my breath, his gives my nipple one gentle kiss and pulls away from me fully, tucking his hard cock back into his shorts.
He looks down at my pussy, and I can see regret on his face.
"Are you going to run out of here and apologize for touching me again?" I snap, pissed off that he just killed my buzz.
"The only thing I'm sorry for is that I can't fuck you the way I want to." With that, he gets up and storms out of the room.
After a few minutes of lying there, I feel a smile creep across my face. He's close to breaking, and I can't wait until he does.