Nothing's more fun- As a publisher in FUN- sigh. There's not really a good way to start off this, is there? I didn't expect to experience writer's block twice, from the conspiracies and now this, but here we are! Uncreative, unmotivated and miserable! I did say I wanted to leave FUN, but at this point I might as well be fired. And getting fired from FUN will really show how miserable of a meat sack I am. If this hell of a company doesn't want me, then who ever will?
Talking about my concerns has broken my writer's block, just a little bit, and that relieves me. Maybe at this rate I'll be able to write about my experience with lizards dressed up as millionaires. One second-
Took me an hour or so, but I'm back. Just had to upload my latest conspiracy on a small subreddit. Now some naïve child will spread this information to his friends, and from there, the work is all theirs. Not sure why FUN asked me to write about old news about reptilians, but it's not my problem, as long as I get enough money and rest. Which should be a normal thing for companies to give their employees. Or is it?
Thankfully, they seemed to have acknowledged me as the only connection to their biggest audience, the media, nowadays. No more overtime, but still a ton of work. But for the first time in days, I'm not in stress nor peril. How nice of them, even if they are strict on whatever I do related to the publishing work, to limit the work they give me to only on the weekdays.
Still, this doesn't change the fact that they're one of the biggest and ominous organisations in the entire nation, or even worse, the entire world. I think I heard there are other FUN offices out there, but I really hope it was an hallucination. I can't stand the thoughts of some conspiracy-writing bozo sitting at his desk for 12 hours a day writing in comments sections of every single popular website is controlling the world using fear, just like the company's crappy motto that I realized were the lyrics to the uncanny songs playing everywhere in the compound only a few days ago.
But what if there was a guy like that? Would it be his fault that majority of society lives in fear of something? Or would it be the fault of someone on a higher status than him that ordered him to do so? I know pulling myself down isn't very healthy for my already unstable mentality, but I keep having negative, negative thoughts. What if I'm the cause of so many problems? What if the reason so many people take their lives away are because of the influence my words have? Even worse, what if it's not an 'if' situation?
But bah, who am I kidding. If I had that of an important job to society, I at least should be a millionaire from how much money I should've received. But here I am, only mildly richer than the average! Come to think of it, I really should be rich from all the money I earn from this company, but maybe it's because I spent too much on paying the bills on both the old and new house, but eh, you get my point, don't you? So, I hope I'll be safe to say that I'm not a 'conspiracy-writing bozo sitting at his desk for 12 hours a day'. Yeah, I really hope I am safe.
I really do.
Writing must've spent up a lot of minutes and hours, for it is time for me to devour one of the few pros of the company, which is the food. The food court is luckily quite close to Section V, and I tend to write a piece of conspiracy while drinking a cup of joe. So glad caffeine is legal, because if not, I would've been on the news as one of the biggest drug addicts out there.
Whoops, almost bumped into one of the testers, and ooh boy, did he give me a look! Oh, just in case you didn't know, they're the people in the panda-shark-dog (Which happens to have an actual name called, you guessed it, panda-shark-dog!) onesies walking around, occasionally with electric collars that go off if you disobey anyone's orders, but also when you try to assault anyone with whatever body part you favor to use, sometimes associated with some tool to aid in making it a successful assault. It's not every day you see someone's head blow up in FUN though, don't worry!
Most of the testers, no matter on the absence of collars, who are scared the living hell out of them, have very wet onesies when they are finished with their daily sessions. Judging from their stench, I'm guessing they're drenched in sweat, but there are faint scents of ammonia somewhere in the crowd. Testers are the real deals of FUN, with their tasks being extraordinarily terrifying and extremely dangerous. Most of their work consists of 'testing' the forms of fears out and give a good description on what they were like and how they could be fixed. Sadly, most of them seem to have lost their minds, which is why I have to help with the translation and sometimes, help with the testing. Although the tests I receive is relatively safer, per se, it's still an uncanny experience to deal with. And, even worse, when the testers aren't around to clean up their messes, the executives call me- Mm, I better stop here. Why? Well, it's because I just got my egg sandwich and coffee, and I surely wouldn't want to ruin my appetite for these beautiful pieces of art! One second though-
Alright. My stomach was very empty before I ate, but now I'm fuller than ever, happy, free and financially stable. God, I really love saying that I'm financially stable. Gives all the motivation I need for a good old day at the worst place you'd ever wish to be in, and gives me a sense of superiority in this depressing situation of life I'm in! Anyways, with that being the case, your friendly neighborhood Giles Diamond will be taking a bit of a rest.
Better enjoy it while it lasts, so that's all from me tonight.