She sighed and shook her head. 'We couldn't do it without the same love.'
'We could try, for God's sake.' His expression was fierce. 'I'm tired of crawling into bed with a stranger and having sex with that same stranger.' 'I want to see the old Sophia again.'
'That Sophia doesn't exist anymore, Raphael,' she said flatly. 'Too much has occurred. 'What exactly do you expect from me?' With wide brown eyes, she looked up at him.
'You,' he said simply. 'As a lover and a friend.'
'I've always been your friend, Raphael,' she said with a gentle smile. 'And I've longed to be your lover again for so long.'
His keen eye was drawn to the gentle beauty of her face. 'You've missed me as well?'
She laughed, but it was a choked laugh. 'That has to be an exaggeration!'
'How are you feeling right now?' he inquired quietly. 'Please tell me!'
'Perplexity, excitement—' she paused.
'Yes?' he insisted.
'Are you trying to convince me to expose myself to the pain you can inflict, Raphael?' She raised an eyebrow at him, wary of his gentle demeanor.
'All I want is the truth between us,' he grumbled. 'However, nothing less.'
'How are you feeling?' she asked softly. 'Vulnerability,' he said flatly.
Now she knew he wasn't joking; vulnerability was the one emotion he swore he'd never feel for her again. She knew it was the closest she'd get to him feeling something for her again, her arms going up around his neck as she finally drew him down to her. 'I want you, Raphael,' she said quietly.
'I want you as well, but...'
'Yes?'
'Not like it has been, Sophia,' he groaned, pressing his face against her throat.
'It can't be like that,' she said softly.
'It can be better than it has been,' he said strongly, his mouth claiming hers.
That it was. If there wasn't love, there was gentleness, sensitivity if there couldn't be understanding, and the closeness of remaining in each other's arms after the heady excitement of their lovemaking.
Sophia hummed to herself while cleaning the apartment. It had been more than two weeks since she and Raphael had reached a more gentle understanding, two weeks when they hadn't argued once, when Raphael had refrained from lashing her with his tongue at every opportunity, their evenings spent companionably, their nights in erotic rapture. Perhaps it was all too good to last, but she planned to take advantage of it while she could.
Dave was even pleased with her medical progress, speculating that if she could continue to rest as she was, the operation might not be necessary after all.
On the third ring, she picked up the phone and lightly recited the number.
'Sophia.' Bella Mcklerin's harassed voice came down the line. 'I've been trying to get in touch with Raphael—'
'He's in Paris for the day on business,' Sophia said, frowning. 'Is there anything wrong?'
'Hello, it's Hugh and Sarah—'
'They aren't worse, are they?' she worriedly asked; she knew Hugh had been sent home with a severe case of measles over the weekend, and Sarah had caught it a few days later.
'About the same,' sighed the older woman. 'They're unhappy, irritable—and Nanny Simons has just caught it,' she added disgustedly.
'Oh dear,' Sophia sighed.
'I'm at a loss for words, my dear,' said the other woman distractedly. 'I called Raphael and asked him to contact an agency and get someone down here to help with the kids.'
'I'll come,' she said emphatically.
'Oh no,' Raphael's mother said quickly. 'Raphael would prefer that I not involve you.'
'Raphael isn't here right now, and you need assistance,' she reasoned. 'I can be there in an hour,' she says.
'I must admit that it sounds appealing, but—Have you had measles?' Bella inquired, concerned.
She laughed dismissively. 'When you're raised in an orphanage, you've had everything there is by the time you leave!'
'Well, if you're sure... I'd be grateful,' Bella admitted with a sigh.
'I'll leave a message with Raphael about what happened and get back to you as soon as possible.'
The kids were both miserable and irritable, miserable because their bodies itched and irritable because they were both tired of lying in bed with nothing to do. Sophia quickly organized Hugh with the plane model she had purchased on the way here, and Sarah with a large wooden jigsaw puzzle.
'Peace reigns supreme.' Bella gratefully sat down in the lounge with Sophia to share a cup of tea.
'For a while,' she admitted, smiling. 'But they'll grow tired of those activities, and I'll have to find them something else to do.' 'I used to help out with the younger kids at the orphanage when they were sick,' she explained.
'I was almost at the end of my patience,' Bella admitted tiredly. 'Nanny awoke feeling ill first thing this morning, and I've been trying, unsuccessfully, to entertain the children ever since.'
And at nearly seventy, she was clearly exhausted. 'Why don't you go to your room and rest while I'm here?' she joked.
'Oh no, I couldn't do it—'
'You can take over the next shift,' she enquired, noticing Bella's tired expression.
Sophia and Bella were both exhausted by the time they fell into a restless sleep later that evening. And there had been no communication from Raphael. His office was now closed in both England and France, and when she called the apartment, there was no answer. A phone call to the airport revealed that his flight had arrived on time, though the woman she spoke with on the phone refused to say whether or not Raphael was on it.
'Perhaps he was delayed in Paris,' his mother speculated. 'Stay here tonight and try again tomorrow.'
'Perhaps I should try the hotel he was staying at over there,' she mused.
'That's a good thought.' The older lady smiled. 'Use the phone in the lounge; I'll just go upstairs and check on the kids.'
The receptionist informed her that Raphael was at the hotel and directed her to his suite.
'Where the hell have you been?' he demanded flatly after she identified herself. 'I've been calling you most of the day,' he grumbled.
'I went out—'
'I figured that,' he remarked sarcastically. 'I'd like to know where you're going.'
She frowned at his aggressive tone; he hadn't spoken to her in a long time. 'Your mother dialed the apartment number, the kids—'
'Hugh and Sarah?' he asked sharply. 'Are they all okay?'
'They're both dozing off now, but—'
'You're at my mother's house?' he interjected once more.
'Raphael, if you'll allow me to finish, I'll be able to tell you what's going on.' The children's nanny is infected with measles—'
'Oh my God,' he moaned. 'Why is it that these things always happen when I'm gone?' He was speaking to himself.
'Your mother was at a loss for what to do,' Sophia explained. 'And so she dialed the apartment number. Raphael, your mother isn't getting any younger, and I couldn't leave her to deal with this on her own after she told me what was going on.'
'You could have contacted an agency—'
'And you decided I'd contacted the wrong person as soon as you got back!' she mocked. 'Raphael, when children are sick, they prefer to be cared for by someone they know.'
'Hugh and Sarah have never met you!'
'They've met me,' she was adamant. 'Your mother and I have done exceptionally well today.'
'I want you to leave there right now,' he said emphatically.
'Why?'
'Don't question me, Sophia,' he said, biting his lower lip. 'Just do what I say.'
'It didn't sound like a request, Raphael,' she stated sternly.
'Take it however you want, Sophia,' he rasped. 'But get out of there right now.'
It was as if the previous two weeks had never happened, with Raphael treating her with his usual contempt. 'I can't do it, Raphael,' she said quietly. 'Your mother needs a good night's sleep, and I've offered to watch the kids while she does.'
'You're refusing to leave despite the fact that you know I don't want you there?' he demanded angrily.
'Yes,' she replied simply.
'I'll talk to you when I get home,' he said coldly. 'Does my mother have time?'
'She's upstairs,' Sophia stated emphatically.
'Then I'll have to see you both tomorrow,' he grumbled.
'I'll still be here to help your mother,' she said matter-of-factly.
His only response to her obstinacy was to ring off abruptly, demonstrating his displeasure with her presence at his mother's house with his children.