Misty
The first week of school sucked. Jake gave me an invitation to some dude's birthday party. I was glad that I got my old job back, so I had to work. But on my second day at work, some guy punched me in the face because the store didn't have his brand of cigarettes. Now I have a black eye.
After my shift, I went home. I know I have been losing more weight. I have not been eating much, just one "meal" a day. I eat to take my meds. Yesterday was Saturday, Jake and Jasper came back from that dude's party late at night. I mean, I get off work at eleven at night and they were not home when I got there. They came home after I was in bed. I have finally got back to the old routine, the one mother made me do. I have been walking to school every day now. I don't want my bike to get taken or something. I was laying down on my bed trying to think of ways to leave this world, falling asleep. Ah darkness, my old friend, how I missed you.
What felt like a minute later, my alarm went off, I turned it off and got up and got went to the bathroom. I was up before everyone. I had to get up before everyone because it was a long walk to school. Jake and Jasper will still beat me to school, even though I leave before they even get up. On my way to school, I tripped and fell on the ground. What a good way to start the day.
I hurt my ankle, so when I got to school I was limping. I was trying to get to my first class when some jerk grabbed me and spun me around. He muttered something like "mate" or some trash like that.
I lifted my head to see who this ass hat was. When I looked up, I saw his electric blue eyes. When I looked at his face, it changed from happy to pissed off. Dude, it is not my fault that you thought I was someone else. Jake was next to this guy, so I grabbed Jake and pulled him in front of him and made a hand gesture that Jake was his mate, then I limped a way to my first class.
Today has been strange. People kept staring at me. At lunch time I went to my locker to put some of my crap in it. When I opened it, there was a dead bunny in it, bleeding all over. Really, is that why people were staring at me? Am I really that hated that someone had to kill a poor bunny and then shove it into my locker?
I wanted to cry for the poor little bunny, but I will give no one the satisfaction of them seeing that they broke me. I don't understand what I did to make people hate me this much. I understand no one will like me, but damn. Killing a defenseless bunny to show hate for someone that is just wrong. I stepped away from the locker, then I turned and walked out of school.
I get the message; no one wants me. Not here, not anywhere. I limped all the way to the cliffs. Before I got locked up, I would come here. Looking down and seeing all the rocks, wondering how it will feel to have my body hit every rock on the way down.
My phone started to ring in my hoodie. I pulled it out and saw that Jake was calling. Turning it off and putting back into my hoodie. I just want to be alone. It is better that way. I hope this whole dead bunny thing will prove that I need to be homeschooled.
Laying down on the grass looking at the sky, I fell into the abyss called sleep. I don't know how long I was sleeping, but I was awoken by an icy breeze. Opening my eyes, I saw that it was now night. Pulling out my phone and turning it back on. I saw I had a bunch of missed calls and texts. I saw it was midnight. Guess it is a good thing I didn't have to work tonight.
I don't understand why I have so many calls and texts. Before mother died, I would come here and be gone all night and no one called or texted. Getting off the ground and limped all the way home. My ankle is so swollen I had to stop and take my sock off. When I returned home, I unlocked the back door and went in. I turned around and relocked the door. Turning back around, I saw Jasper running into the kitchen. I looked at him; he ran to me and hugged me. Jasper let go and started to interrogate me.
Before I could utter a word, Jasper said that Jake and father were looking for me. Jasper told me that they are on their way back home. Why were they looking for me? Once again, I could say nothing, for Jake and father busted into the house and ran into the kitchen and up to me. Father demanded I tell him where I was. I limped up to him and blew up. I screamed, why does he care where I was, and I demanded when did he start to care? I continued to say that no one gave two shits about me or what I did a year ago. Tears started to fall from my eyes. I am so pissed off. I told him nothing has changed. The only thing that changed is the fact I was locked up for a year. I know the rules never changed for me and I must uphold them. I have had these rules since I was a child.
I think I lost my mind. I started to go off about how I know I don't deserve happiness or life. I know I will never get married; I know everything that mother ever told me is true. I told him I know I am not wanted here. I have never broken the rule of telling people that I live here, nor did I tell them that they are my family.
I obeyed all the rules that mother gave me. When people come over, I leave the house. I don't talk to Jake nor Jasper at school or when people are around. I touch nothing in the house unless it is in the bathroom or in my room, get a job, pay rent, don't expect help with anything, do not tell people where I live or who I live with, I have to walk or use my bike to go places I need to get to, if I get beat it is my fault. I have been following the rules, so I do not understand what the hell the problem is. If there are new rules I do not know about, then how can I follow them? I looked into my dad's eyes; I told him I know… I know I do not deserve to live. I just do not understand why you didn't just let me die! I know mom was telling me the truth about everything, every word she ever uttered to me.
I know I am not part of this family, so tell me "dad" why do you care now? You never cared when mom would beat me until I lost consciousness or when she would tell me to go die. My favorite part was when she would take a butcher knife and cut up my back. Never, not once, did you ever try to stop it. So, I do not understand why you care now. I told him he does not have to worry about people finding me dead. No one would know who I belong to. I informed him I will be nameless. Hell, I do not have the same last name! Father walked up to me; I thought he was going to hit me like mother always did but, he hugged me. He has NEVER hugged me before. Only my grandparents and my brothers hugged me. Why is he crying? Father said mom had problems. That is when father told me that mother never wanted me. No shit! But that is when father dropped a big bomb on me. Father told me that I was adopted. I pushed him away and demanded he tell me the truth about everything. Kane hung his head. He told me that I was found after the dog attack. Kane said that he took me to the hospital and found my actual parents, but they did not want me. Kane continued; he said they found out what my name was.
Kane said that he took me home with him. But his wife did not want me, so she did what she did because I was not her child. My whole life has been a lie? The man I have thought was my father said he felt sorry for me, so he brought me to their house. I limped up to him; I got in his face. I told him I wished he left me in the woods to die. It would have been better that way. I feel nothing. I told this man that I was leaving this house, turning around to walk out the door. Kane grabbed me, he pulled me into his chest. He begged me not to go and everything will change. He said if you are leaving then Jake, Jasper, and himself are coming with me.