Chereads / Altier; The Triology / Chapter 20 - Dazai - Breaking the World I Hate The Most

Chapter 20 - Dazai - Breaking the World I Hate The Most

A Day In The Fated Future

Location - Unknown

(Dazai Crowley's POV)

I couldn't contain my rage any longer.

Both my body, mind and my very spirit seethed with nothing more but pure, raw and undiluted anger.

Only one thought ran through my mind.

"Break free."

I wasn't going to wait until I "woke up". I simply didn't have the time, nor the patience to do so.

So I'll force myself awake. And that's something I'm going to do right now with no hesitation.

Wherever my hands were, I clenched them tightly.

Even if it was simply in my pure imagination, I bawled them into mighty fists.

I mustered whatever emotions and/or energy I could spare into this single effort.

As I channeled it all into my body and held it as best as I could, I built tension, maximizing the amount of spiritual pressure pent inside.

All of this did not come without the cost of great stress and pain, but honestly, I couldn't care less. Because all that mattered to me was that I returned home, back to my original state of being.

Even if it meant I need to break this aimless "world".

And so I shouted outwards, towards the top of my lungs, holding back absolutely nothing, regardless of the repercussions on my throat.

"GRAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!"

.

.

.

.

How long did I shout?

A minute? An hour? Perhaps a year, or maybe a decade?

I couldn't tell, but it didn't matter.

Not for a moment did I stop to think, nor care.

I simply did what I needed to do and didn't stop for nothing. That's all there was to it. And soon enough, the time for me to reap my rewards came.

It first started off as an unnoticeable crack.

A little rift in reality if you would.

But as the time passed, while my anger never wavered, those cracks multiplied into dozens, then hundreds, thousands, millions, and even billions.

It was like a chain reaction of nothing more but pure yet beautiful destruction.

Until finally….

This "world" shattered like glass.

As if some sort of broken ice sculpture or a decaying house, this unfathomable reality left behind cracks in between each of the broken pieces, showing visible damage left beyond the point of repair.

One to which only a god could undo.

While I was unaffected by the destruction I caused, I had to suffer the drawbacks in exchange for my successful efforts. My anger eventually wavered, my screams ceased, my energy was gone, and the stress became taxing on both my mind, body and spirit.

"So…..I guess, that's that, huh….Heh, I don't think….I ever felt this.....unsatisfied before…"

I was completely done. There was nothing more I could do. My eyes opened and closed multiple times, as my consciousness started to flicker.

To sleep in a world where I can't even recognize my own existence….how annoying. Well, I can atleast try to sleep well, knowing that I was able to break the "world" I hate the most before I die…

But suddenly…

"I see. So you broke through one of the many parts of Fiction, huh? In a timely fashion faster than what we originally anticipated, no less."

As I finally resigned myself to what seemed to be my fate, I suddenly heard a mysterious voice, echoing through the cracks of the world's destruction.

"Dazai Crowley, to think you could exceed the expectations of even the gods themselves." The feminine voice continued, sounding rather pleased.

"W-who are you?" I ask, but this time, the stutter was not intentional.

"Now, now, let's not get too ahead of ourselves shall we? All you did was just pass the first test."

"Test?"

But the voice only continued to speak further, as if ignoring my inability to follow the conversation.

"But then again, you did just destroy a "world" made purely from lackluster imagination. I suppose that alone does merit some sort of reward."

As the mysterious voice spoke on as if reaching some conclusion, the emotions of what seemed to be fear and anxiety slowly bubbled inside my body.

But at the same time, I couldn't help but notice an odd sliver of excitement rise from within as well.

Mere moments after the voice spoke, a sudden flash of familiar light began to burst through each and every last one of the cracks I created.

At first it was nearly blinding like a flashbang, forcing me to close my eyes.

I don't know why, but for some reason, I was reluctant, almost terrified to see again. Because something told me that once I do….

…my life will never be the same.

That was what I believed until two hands suddenly fell upon my cheeks. They were cold like ice, but tender and loving all the same. I could feel affectionate emotions coursing through their palms.

"Open your eyes, Dazai, and bear witness to me and all of the glory that I am."

When that voice spoke those words, I finally felt the presence of a person standing before me. The overwhelming light in my eyes faded in intensity, becoming bearable to see through.

Accustoming myself to it, I opened my eyes and looked towards the person in front of me.

Only for me to stand here, drifting through the broken space, in nothing but pure disbelief.

It was a woman, one whose beauty was something I simply could not fathom. Her presence was nothing but pure and innocent benevolence.

Her fair skin not only knew no dirty blemish or scar, but also seemed to give off a dim yet rather warm luster of their own.

Her hair even seemed to be naturally whiter than my strangely pale white hair bang, except hers was more luscious than the quality of my sister's.

On top of that, she wore a loose and thick white nightgown similar to a wedding dress except less formal. There also appeared to be several beautiful angelic feathers laced in frill and cuff like manners.

Although her choice of clothing was fairly modest and properly covered her body, I was able to make out a subtle majority of her revealed cleavage.

However, one thing in particular about her struck out as odd to me.

Despite being able to see those details, something about her still felt rather "elusive", as if I was unable to witness her in her true self.

For example, her face seemed to strangely be covered by thick shadows, preventing me from seeing her eyes and the upper corner of her nose.

Was she some sort of ghost? Or perhaps some deity communicating with me through astral projection?

But before I could question it, she suddenly spoke up, interrupting my train of thought.

"I am your "final destination". The one to which you have been seeking for so long." She answered.

"Destination? What are you talking about?"

But the woman refused to elaborate nor speak personally. Instead, she simply smiled at me and continued to speak rather elusively.

"You will know soon enough. In time, the answer will be made clear, allowing you to finally reach the one and the only….truth."

I wonder why she emphasized the word, "truth".

Wait a minute…

"Are you referring to my amnesia?"

She nodded.

"Correct. Never forget Dazai. This is your trial…your "final" test, even. If you can recall the pieces of yourself in which you once lost and remember the bigger picture, the meaning behind your fate....you won't be too far from obtaining the "essence of excellence" you have yearned for so long…."

She spoke softly, like a single mother whose voice could soothe even the wildest of children.

Unlike with Blair, I could tell at first glance that the words of this woman carried an overwhelming amount of purity and honesty, being completely devoid of any foul or illicit meaning.

In fact, simply hearing her speak those words alone brought a strange sense of relief. Perhaps it dealt with the fact that I picked up on a certain nugget of information about myself in this short conversation.

Regardless, as roundabout as it sounded, her words were confirmation in of itself.

The answers to all my questions truly lie in the past of which I once forgot.

This truth alone was comforting to hear, enough to satiate my anger and relax.

But when I became more subconsciously aware of that desire to rest, my eyes were suddenly starting to grow heavier by the second.

The urge to sleep was quickly becoming unbearable.

…I guess where there is fatigue, the inescapable clutches of sleep are not far behind. And I no longer had any strength left, both physically, mentally or spiritually to fight both my exhaustion and hunger…

Damn it!

There was so much more I wanted to ask. Things I needed to know, questions that demanded answers!

I can't rest now! Not yet! Just...give….!!

...me another minute...! Please...not yet…..

"Heh."

But before my eyes closed for the very last time, I heard the mysterious woman speak yet again.

First it started as a small yet endearing chuckle, but she eventually mumbled something aloud.

"I believe in you, Dazai. I know you have what it takes to rise to the occasion and soon you shall realize that too. Because you are….."

She paused for a moment, as if contemplating whether to finish her train of thought.

But before the anticipation could kill me…

"....you are the only one here who is capable of taking the place of a god…."

After she spoke, I felt a rather strange soft yet warm sensation on my forehead. It was small and fleeting yet passionate nonetheless.

It was a simple kiss. Something so simple yet, for some reason, unforgettable all the same.

As she removed her hands from my cheeks, I returned back to the broken space of the world itself, only for me to fall unconscious yet again.

Then for the very last time, she departed me with one last goodbye comment:

"Till we meet again….Dazai Crowley~"