Kabuto sat in the armless chair, Hokage in front of him, Toad Sage behind and a team of hidden ANBU ready to strike at a moment's notice. Objectively, his situation was precarious but as a former spy, he'd gotten used to it, learned to manage the anxiety before it became full-blown panic. They had yet to ask him a question, which meant they were awaiting the arrival of someone else. When the door opened behind him, before he even heard her trademark laugh, he just knew who it was.
"Kukuku, I certainly was not expecting to see you today, Kabuto-kun," she said as she walked passed her former second-in-command. Kabuto surveyed her in but a glimpse. It was short but he'd seen all he needed to. The ostentatious ring glinting in the light; minor, yet significant, body changes that could only mean one thing. She was engaged, possibly married, and pregnant for that lowly, childish Uzumaki. He fought to remain still, forced his body not to adjust his glasses in a show of his seething rage.
She was capable of so much, meant for more and she settled for that… worm? A lower lifeform, a hammer only capable of bludgeoning things. His mistress found that Uzumaki, back always straight, an arrogant smile that suggested he was in on some secret shared by the universe. A boy. A boy. She changed for a boy like some fangirl. Most powerful and feared woman in the shinobi nations and she'd rather play house with a boy.
It was almost too much, discipline and fear of death be damned. She needed to see, needed to be called into account for how far she'd fallen. What was it about the Uzumaki that made him so impressive to her? While he may have had some talent, he was just as babied and protected as every other Leaf brat blessed to walk in the light. Because he was a good fighter? So were a lot of people. That he had some jutsu? So what? How many jutsu from the same elemental do you need?
What did Naruto Uzumaki have that he, Kabuto, did not? What was so special about this boy, A BOY, that it made the person he respected most in the world forget herself and forget him? What?
"Kabuto," Tsunade spoke, getting the medic's attention.
"Yes, Tsunade-sama?" he replied, trying to calm himself as he felt that old blood stirring. He needed to get out of here and complete his deal with Zetsu.
"Why are you here? Is Zetsu dead?"
"No," he said.
"Kukuku, and yet, you dare return? How brave of you," Orochi quipped.
"Zetsu had proven most elusive, this is true but the reason I returned is he made me an offer. He wants me to abduct Uchiha Sasuke. In return, he offered to kill Naruto, believing that is something I want," Kabuto said, knowing he had to give most of the truth for any of this to work.
"If Zetsu were capable of killing Naruto, why wouldn't he abduct Sasuke by himself?" Tsunade asked and Kabuto cursed her internally. Dealing with lesser minds had hampered his game.
"I don't know, Hokage-sama. He wasn't long on details, he seemed ready to attack me should I have given him reason to doubt me." Tsunade turned her chair to stare out the window. Like her two teammates, she was digesting what Kabuto had reported. She mulled the swift change in weather as storm clouds appear to gather in the once cloudless sky. The Fifth Hokage suspected Kabuto was holding something back, something important. The question was could they use him, uncover his plot and neutralize him before he had a chance to strike or go to ground? Should she just execute him now? One swift punch would do it.
As the raindrops started to fall and the sounds and smells of the storm filled her office, Tsunade cursed Hiruzen for leaving her with this mess. He should have killed the boy and been done with it. Instead, he all but pardoned the traitor and used him as a pawn and since that was one of his last official acts, Tsunade couldn't legally kill him for something her predecessor had adjudicated. Just another corner of Sensei's cluster of pronounced fuckery left on her desk like an errant shit she was expected to clean up. The Godaime closed her eyes, the steady pattern of the rain helping her think. She wanted to get rid of the last of the Akatsuki, even Obito saying Zetsu was a danger with his intelligence-gathering abilities.
The Uchiha had given as much information as he could on the… thing as it was not a living person. When Obito said it was Madara's will manifested, Naruto immediately called bullshit. Tsunade smiled as she recalled her surrogate nephew going into lecture mode about yin tethers and how if Zetsu were Madara's will Madara would have to be alive or Zetsu would have ceased to exist. Obito reassured them Madara was definitely dead so that meant Zetsu had been convincing and conniving enough to even trick that man.
Sneaking up on him was almost impossible, Kabuto confirmed what Obito reported about the plant thing's sensory abilities. Obito didn't know much about his combat prowess but suspected he could hold his own against most ninja. Zetsu presented the worst kind of threat, a known unknown. It made plotting and planning to remove the thing mind-numbingly difficult. This meant Kabuto's triple agent routine might be their best bet. She'd have to get Sasuke in on the plan, maybe have Naruto give him a Hiraishin kunai so the two boys could just kill or seal the thing.
Tsunade turned around, decision having been made. She then proceeded to drill down a plan to trap the last Akatsuki member. Again and again, and again. The details never changed but no one in the room seemed to notice; except Jiraiya. The Toad Sage had been having this inkling, this instinct that something wasn't right. Or better stated, off-balance. He couldn't put his finger on it so he walked to and sat in the window. For some reason, the storm reverberated with him but he felt equally pulled to and away from it, feeling the need to go over Tsunade's plan again.
Forcing himself to focus on the rainfall he finally pinpointed the abnormality, the rain was brimming with Senjutsu chakra, which meant it wasn't natural. Jiraiya hastily threw up a barrier meant to shield all senses within it.
"Kai!" Jiraiya called out as he disrupted his chakra and immediately noticed Tsunade and Orochimaru were looking at and interacting with an empty chair, Kabuto was gone. He broke each one out of the genjutsu and her ANBU guard.
"What the hell, Jiraiya!" Tsunade yelled. She was the world's best medic, as in touch with her chakra flow as anyone so putting her under a genjutsu was no small feat.
"Kabuto is gone, don't know for how long and the only thing preventing us from falling into the same genjutsu is this barrier," Jiraiya explained.
"The storm?" Orochi concluded, briefly recalling it starting but paying it no more attention, however now, thanks to the barrier, she couldn't sense any part of it.
"Yes. Did Naruto know Kabuto was back? This is his technique," he said.
"I didn't tell him but that is clearly irrelevant and we're wasting time. He didn't take Kabuto to give him a lecture," Orochi responded.
"I need to go," Jiraiya said as he performed the summoning jutsu, the results surprising his teammates. "Ma, Pa, I'm sorry to be short but I need to enter Sage Mode and stop Naruto."
Both toads hop on his shoulders but it didn't stop Shima from asking, "What is Naruto-chan going to do, Jiraiya boy?"
"Remove a threat to his family. Unfortunately, that threat is a village asset."
Pa nodded sagely, "Naruto-chan prefers decisive action. He's like Minato-chan in that way."
"Yea, yea, he's a chip off the old block which is why we can't delay." The two sages focused and balanced the natural energy for Jiraiya. Now looking very toad-like, he turned to Tsunade and said, "I can control this barrier remotely, so when it drops send every ANBU you can." Jiraiya hopped out the window, his heightened senses alerting him to two Narutos, one cloaked under a genjutsu by Kurenai and the other with his teammates on the Nara lands. He'd go there and draw the real one, who he assumed to be with Kurenai, to him. As he dashed toward his destination he ignored that he hadn't sensed Kabuto.
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Earlier before Jiraiya was making a mad dash toward the members of Team Kurenai, the young men were in their sensei's house, Shino holding Mirai and Shikamaru smirking as Naruto got several bonks on the head. After three, Kurenai hugged her problem child. Why the reaction? Like Shino and Shikamaru, Naruto informed Kurenai Orchi and he were engaged but didn't mention she was pregnant. That, however, was not the cause of her violent reaction but his reasoning of withholding the news to not overshadow Mirai's arrival. Kurenai thought it was stupid as they could all use more joy.
Though she did instill a new team rule of no children until they were S class ninja or twenty years old. When Naruto suggested he could get them to S class in six months of dedicated training, both intended victims were vehement in their refusal. Seeing Naruto look so smug, she bonked him again and said that was for putting a shadow on her. She'd long suspected it, but only recently had she caught Mageela. The unofficial fifth member of the team reassured Kurenai she was there to observe but not report. Kurenai then took the time to introduce the much larger panther to her daughter.
Now, the team was outback as they'd explained the dilemma and plan to Kurenai. She wasn't enthusiastic but agreed to aid them. She watched Naruto create a shadow clone and then sit down with his legs crossed. She cloaked the entire team, hiding their presence just before Naruto became engulfed in golden bijuu chakra. A tail went to Kurenai, Shino, and Shikamaru giving them the version one bijuu cloak. It was the only way to shield them from his jutsu while they were on the move. With the aid of Kurama, Naruto was already pulling in and balancing the natural energy with his chakra, soon the horizontal bar pupil overlayed the vertical slits.
"Ok, walk us through this jutsu one more time, Naruto," Kurenai requested.
"It starts with the Typhoon Release, with sage-infused bijuu chakra I can generate a village-wide storm. Nagato had something similar in Ame going constantly and used it as a sensory jutsu. The genjutsu I'll overlay happens in conjunction, meaning it is laced in the very clouds and permeates every sensation the storm produces; sight, sound, smell, touch, and taste."
"Pure hypnosis," Kurenai said, sincerely impressed.
"Yes, but the downsides are several. Even for me, this is chakra intensive, I can't move while using it and it generates a good deal of mental strain because of the number of people I'm affecting. It also takes over one hundred hand signs," Naruto explained.
"It's good you know its limitations."
"Once the rain really starts coming down you two get a move one. Kyuubi's chakra protects you but you'll still be coated in rain, meaning anyone who hadn't been affected will be should they see you." Seeing his teammates nod, Naruto closes his eyes to focus. He began the long chain of hand signs, performing each one with the skill befitting a ninjutsu specialist. The Uzumaki increased his speed as he went through, hands moving faster near the end compared to the beginning.
The effects could be seen instantaneously, as the clouds started to form before he was even half done. Three quarters finished and the first drops started to fall, the amount and rate of rainfall increasing as Naruto neared completion. On the last sign, Naruto thought, ['Sage Art: Kyoka Suigetsu'] and Konoha was blanketed in a sudden storm but almost none sensed anything was askew.
Shino and Shika shunshin'd away, arriving just a short distance from the Hokage tower. The Nara could tell no one saw them. It was impressive but he had no time to marvel. Running to the tower, they post outside the window and overhear the conversation. Patiently, they waited and when they heard the loop restart, the heirs slipped into the office and grabbed Kabuto, Shino knocking him unconscious. It was surreal to see the three Sannin continue to speak to someone that wasn't conscious nor would be there soon. Draped over his shoulder, Shino and Shikamaru made their way to the Nara forests, where Naruto's shadow clone was awaiting them.
Once they made it to the final destination, Naruto erected a sensory barrier and then restrained Kabuto with steel chains. Once set, he broke Kabuto free of the illusion and the other two lost their bijuu cloak. The medic blinked, clearly confused as to where he was and how he got there but once he laid eyes on Naruto he tried to break free, desire to kill him overriding any other concern. A startingly strong punch to the jaw settled Kabuto down, nearly concussing him.
"We don't have a lot of time so this isn't going to be a whole thing. You're about to die, make whatever peace you can. Or don't, I don't care. Shika, you're up," Naruto said. Shikamaru approached the medic with some powder in a vial. He poured into his hands. Once Shikamaru was right in front of the bound Kabuto, he blew the substance in Kabuto's face, forcing the spy of Oto to ingest it.
At first, Kabuto felt nothing but soon he noticed an elevated heart rate and the sensation that time had slowed considerably. He watched the Aburame approach him and it felt like it took hours when logically he knew that to be impossible. Said shinobi placed one finger near Kabuto's hairline. Kabuto couldn't see but felt an insect climb onto him. Then he felt pain.
"That type of beetle burrows. Right now, it's doing that to your skull and will continue until it eats through your brain."
The torture he was experiencing made writhe against he bindings but he could only haplessly flail. It was as if he was feeling each bite in its greatest detail, over and over again. So blinded by pain, Kabuto didn't realize Naruto had returned until the Uzumaki yanked him up by the hair so they were eye to eye. He watched Naruto go through a chain of hand signs before he, Kabuto, was slapped with an open palm in his chest. The newest sensation felt like a small tug, something pulling him to the ground.
"The jutsu I just performed, it's a Jiton technique I haven't named yet but you're going to be pulled toward the core of the planet. Now luckily for you, you merge with the earth so it isn't that different from doton techniques that allow underground movement. The difference, however, is that you have no control over how far and how fast you sink. There is also the reality the jutsu will run out of chakra eventually and then you will be crushed instantly.
As Kabuto was forcibly lowered into his final resting place he could barely form a coherent thought. Knowing he was going to die but experiencing it so slowly was peeling away the layers of his sanity. He tried to scream but felt a strong hand grip his jaw, painfully.
"I've taken your life, Kabuto, do not give me your dignity as well," the Uzumaki advised. Even as slowly as the words came out, Kabuto could still see the value of them. No, he would not give this boy his dignity. While fast for them, for Kabuto finally being subterranean took a lifetime. He did not know how far he sank, could not tell how deeply the insect had burrowed into his skull but when the jutsu finally ended he welcomed death, the pressure of the interior levels of the planet crushing him instantly.
Sometime after their successful assassination, the real Naruto arrived having ended his jutsu and dispelling the clone. "Jiraiya is on his way," he explained. He was out of Kurama and Sage Mode, both having done much to alleviate his headache but the mental strain was still there, just lightened. Jiraiya landed hard, Ma and Pa on his shoulders. Naruto rolled his eyes, his godfather was being extra.
"Where his Kabuto?" Jiraiya asked but there was a clear demand in his tone.
"Who's that?" Shika asked.
"That medic that wished he was Orochi-chan's cuckold," Naruto explained before remembering his manners, "Hi Granny and Grandpa Sage," he called out as he waved.
"Hi, Naruto-chan," Shima responded while also waving.
"He sounds like a bitchboy. We don't associate with them," Shino explained, getting back to the topic at hand. "Why? Well, that should be self-evident."
"Are you three having fun? Because pretty soon there's going to be several squads of ANBU here to take you into custody and they won't be nice about it."
"I'd imagine they'd be a little mannerable as I can get rude, too."
"Really, Naruto? How's the headache? You probably couldn't fight a wet paper bag," Jiraiya challenged.
"Pfft, don't start talking slick because you're in Sage Mode, Shitty Pervert," Naruto warned.
"Naruto-chan, language! You are a proud Toad Summoner and will comport yourself thusly," Shima lambasted.
"That'd carry more weight if the boy wasn't right about Jiraiya's perversions," Fukasaku observed.
"He's a lost cause but Naruto-chan can still be set straight. Minato-chan never used bad language."
As the two toads bickered, much to Jiraiya's embarrassment, Shino leaned over to Naruto and said, "She is aware your father was the greatest mass murderer the shinobi villages have ever produced, yes?"
"I'm sure she's heard, Shino," Naruto said, dryly.
"Then why-"
"It's not even worth trying to explain. I've just learned to accept it."
As the most relaxed standoff in history continued the surrounded forests were filled with a series of swooshes and gently ruffled trees. The ANBU had arrived and hurridly surrounded Team Kurenai, weapons drawn.
Naruto, looking down and holding his head asked Shika, "How many you count?"
"At least two dozen, wouldn't be surprised if it were double that."
"Man, we should kick their asses just because," Naruto said casually, as if the presence of the village's elite forces were of no great concern.
"Do not, I repeat, do not choose right now to show how gallingly troublesome you can be, Naruto."
"What crawled up your butt, Shika? I didn't say I was going to fight them. I just said we should."
"He's been taking a lot of cold showers, he finds them to be a drag," Shino explained. Naruto laughed in return.
"Oh… I wouldn't know,"
"I hate both you bastards," Shika said, getting even Shino to chuckle. The scene confused the ANBU, none of them used to being treated like non-factors, especially in this large a group. The boys made a show of surrendering, especially the son of the Yondaime, as if he were doing them the favor. The boys continued to converse as they traveled in a leisurely pace under a, once again, cloudless sky.