"Strongest shinobi since the Shodai," Shikamaru observed without prompt, Shino nodding in agreement. "Single-handedly revolutionizing chakra manipulation," the Nara continued.
"Excellent swordsman and taijutsu practitioner, too," Shino added, to really rub salt in the wound.
"All this hard work just to punch an old man in the face?" Shikamaru asked, causing Naruto's eye to twitch.
"Elder abuse is frowned upon, Naruto," said Shino, causing Naruto to finally respond.
"I hate you both so very much," the Uzumaki said, head under a depression cloud. He didn't want to be here, at the Chunin stadium. He certainly didn't want to be here to spar the Old Man but apparently, when summons have conflict their summoners are expected to settle matters. Naruto didn't personally feel there was much to settle. Bast does as she pleases, no one was going to stop her unless they had the power to do so, which Enma didn't. But she also didn't kill anyone so no harm no foul.
The Monkey King and the former Hokage disagreed. Well, Enma did. Hiruzen thought them fighting would be a great way for them to resolve their issues. Naruto saw the logic, as much as he didn't like it he knew that sometimes you just had to cross fists to hash out your differences and then talk later. Still, Naruto had no interest in it. He'd processed and resolved the hate he had for the Old Man. Even a lot of the hurt was gone. Nothing could change what Hiruzen did, how he chose his vanity at the expense of Naruto. However, that could be gotten over and while they'd never be close again they could coexist.
No, the oceanic problem that no bridge could cross was that Hiruzen had a deep and sincere hatred for Orochimaru, she had the same and Naruto had clearly chosen a side. There was simply no relationship to mend with someone that schemed to get his future wife killed or exiled and hunted. But the Old Man persisted and even Bast said Naruto should just do it, so here he was. With his asshole teammates, being accused of elder abuse.
"You know, that geezer could kick both your asses," Naruto observed as he put on his armor, preparing to enter the arena floor.
Shino and Shikamaru shared the briefest of glances before Shino said, "You're still about to beat on a grandfather and retiree."
"Have I mentioned how much I hate you both?" That laughter was the only response to his question annoyed him even more. Naruto left the changing area and headed to the battleground, Hiruzen, and Enma waiting with Jiraiya. It had only been a day since this was decided and yet, somehow, word had spread and the stadium was full. Once Naruto arrived at Jiraiya's location, he bit his left thumb and slid blood down the summoning tattoo on his arm. Slamming his hand down, Bast appeared in a hunter green and gold trim cloak.
"Oh, fight time already?" Bast asked and Naruto nodded. She turned to walk away, confusing her summoner who made his confusion known.
"Granny, where are you going?"
"To take a seat, obviously," she answered.
"It is not obvious. Aren't you going to help me here since you caused this?" Naruto asked.
"Do you need my help, Naruto-chan?" she asked with a quirked brow.
"It'd be nice," her summoner responded. Bast rolled her eyes and continued walking. Naruto put his face in his hands trying not to yell in frustration.
"I guess all relevant parties are here now," Jiraiya started. "This is a fight between summoners but all Konoha rules and regulations apply. No killing blows, no maiming. Additional stipulations for you, Naruto, are no bijuu chakra, no Sage mode-"
"No shadow clones, no wood clones, do the hokey pokey before I turn myself around. Yes, Jiraiya, I already agreed with this."
"And no Dust Release, smartass," Jiraiya said. Thanks to the location, Jiraiya's voice was picked up and broadcast to all in attendance, and those watching on a special feed within the village. The Gama Sannin saw a brief look of fury pass his godson's face, which confused him.
"No one but you knew I could do that, yet, Jiraiya,"
"Oh… Jiraiya goofed, huh?"
"Yup," Naruto said, popping the p at the end.
"How much is this going to cost me?"
"Why, Godfather, I appreciate you paying for my wedding," Naruto said, sounding entirely too sincere for Jiraiya's taste.
"Half!" Jiraiya said, both ignoring that much of the village could hear this.
"Ok," Naruto said and watched Jiraiya nod in affirmation. "And then, the other half. You're all class, Godfather."
"You're a shakedown artist!" Jiraiya accused, causing Naruto to laugh for the first time today. Naruto just shrugged and Jiraiya lowered his head. "Ugh, fight," Jiraiya said, moving out the way. Hiruzen speeds through a sequence of hand signs, unleashing an [Earth Style: Earth Flow River] toward Naruto, assuming he was unprepared. This was proven wrong when Naruto finished his own hand signs, the technique stopping the mud river in its tracks, turning it back to its solid state.
"[Earth Style: Quick Hardening,]" Naruto said. "If an E rank jutsu I created to keep my sandals clean can stop you then maybe we should call this off."
Hiruzen ignored his grandson and performed another sequence of hand signs, inhaling deeply and exhaling a stream of flames. The [Fire Style: Dragon Flame Bomb] blazed toward Naruto, who had also been preparing his own jutsu. Having inhaled a beat after Hiruzen and unleashed his counter a moment later, the [Wind Style: Backdraft Spear] was a vacuum manipulation jutsu meant to counter fire techniques specifically. As the flame is deprived of oxygen, it follows Naruto's concentrated wind tunnel back to the original caster. Hiruzen and Enma rolled out of the backlash, neither receiving any burns and continued moving in opposite directions.
It was obvious to Naruto what they were attempting so to stall their tactic he flowed through more hand signs and targeted Hiruzen. The [Lava Style: Dragon Missile Bombardment] formed from the ground with a dragon's head of lava emerging from it and then spitting dozens of projectiles of burning rock. Not even a mud wall of Hiruzen's level could withstand the impact and he had to take evasive action. Knowing the Old Man was distracted, Naruto sped toward Enma.
Enma didn't have time to be shocked by Naruto appearing before him, the uppercut to his midsection took all of his attention. The second one was less considered but no less felt, lifting the chief summons off his feet. To end the indignity he was grabbed by his tail and thrown toward Hiruzen as if he were nothing but an annoyance. The Monkey King managed to land on his feet after a few rolls to distribute the force of his impact and deftly avoiding any pools of lava leftover from Naruto's diversionary tactic.
"Are you ok, Enma?" Hiruzen asked while never taking his eyes off Naruto.
"The boy is strong," Enma responded, still reeling from the exchange. Hiruzen provided nothing in return.
Many in the crowd were reeling from the pre-fight revelations and the first exchange. Whispers speculating who the Honorable Son could be getting married to warred with him being able to use the famed Dust Release of the Ni and Sandaime Tsuchikage. Ino, ever the gossip, wanted to extract information out of Shikamaru, Shino and he having joined the rookies in the stands, only to be met with surprise.
"You don't know?" Shikamaru asked. He honestly hadn't thought it a secret but he sometimes forgot Team Kurenai often acted in a separate world, most people didn't know what the hell they got up to and they all preferred it that way.
"Of course I didn't know," Ino said. "He hasn't even been back that long, who snatched him up?"
"You sound almost disappointed," Shika observed.
Ino shrugged while saying, "I'm not looking to settle down or anything but we could have had some fun. So, who is it?"
"Probably some basic bitch that doesn't challenge him in any way and swoons at the very sight of Naruto-sama," Tenten interjected. Shino's repressed bout of laughter unnerved everyone, only making them more uncomfortable as he lost complete control. Shikamaru soon gave out and joined his teammate. Even Kurenai let a few go.
"Well, I don't know if I'd called Orochimaru a basic bitch but you certainly can, Tenten," Shikamaru said, causing the rookies to pale.
"Wha...wha… no!" The weapons mistress said in disbelief. `
"What's with you nerds getting all the hot chicks?" Kiba blurted out in mild frustration. While not stated the best, the other rookie shinobi had to agree. Orochimaru scared the shit out of all of them but she was a certified snack; Temari and Tayuya were both very attractive and outside of whatever Sasuke was doing with Sakura, none of them were involved with anyone.
"Extra inch for every ten IQ points over 130," Shino said dryly as if he were delivering a scientific certainty.
"202," Shikamaru added.
"Wait… that can't be true, Kakashi-sensei?" Kiba asked.
"210," the Hatake said with an eye smile. His team sweatdropped.
Back to the arena floor, Naruto decided to go on the offensive. The [Lava Style: Magma River] gushed from below the surface, headed straight toward Hiruzen. The Sandaime, remaining remarkably calm for a yoton technique he'd never seen, flowed through the seals for the [Water Style: Wild Water Wave]. The two jutsu met in the middle, instantaneously reacting to each other, battling to see which would have the lasting impact. The suiton jutsu won as it rapidly cooled the lava and generated a great deal of steam.
Naruto continued with his next attack, forcing Hiruzen to evade as six black-as-night- shuriken launched from the form. The [Lava Style: Obsidian Shuriken Jutsu] was just a diversion. Hiruzen ably dipped, ducked and dodged the projectiles but his path led him directly into a thin streak of blue lightning. Naruto's [Lightning Style: Piercing Fang] hit true but he was already catching the uppercut coming from underground before he realized he'd dispelled a mud clone. Striking out with a back fist, Naruto dispelled another mud clone.
It was now the Uzumaki's turn to evade as one Fuma shuriken because dozens, the Sandaime's [Shadow Shuriken Jutsu] being deftly utilized on a distracted opponent. Naruto saw, what he assumed to be the real Hiruzen's location and swiftly came up with a plan. Instead of moving and falling into a trap, Naruto decided to stand his ground. The crowd collectively gasped as an impromptu forest was grown right before their eyes, for it was one thing to be told he could use the Mokuton but it was another to witness it.
The Fuma shuriken were stopped by the thick and sturdy trees. Naruto retrieved his own shuriken but did not throw it, instead utilizing his Koton to make it into a gunbai. Showing his facility with one-handed signs, Naruto performed the [Fire Style: Incinerator Bullet] and juiced the blistering hot fireball with the wind generated by the swing of the gunbai. Hiruzen created another mud wall but Naruto would not have the chance to see if it could withstand his combined attack. Enma, again, decided to engage the Uzumaki in taijutsu, likely feeling he'd have an edge in the trees.
Beginning with a leg sweep, followed by a roundhouse, Enma was all aggression. He demonstrated what years of experience could net as his attacks wasted no motion nor energy. But he could not break through the defenses of his much younger opponent. If not outright blocked, his attacks were parried or dodged. Even as they moved through the trees, Enma found his attacks negated. Getting frustrated, Enma lashed out with a straight right. Naruto grabbed the attacking arm and brought his leg over it, kicking Enma twice with his forward and backward motion. Naruto then pulled the Monkey King into a shattering left hook that sent the summons hurtling toward the ground. Instead of the hard impact he expected, he was caught by Hiruzen.
"I have the high ground, Old Man. You wanna concede?" Naruto asked from his lofty perch.
As the crowd watched the mastery level display of ninjutsu, one attendee was vocally more appreciative than others.
"Yea, Cubby, kick that monkey's ass!" Bast yelled, spilling some of her popcorn. Orochimaru and Tsunade laughed at the exuberant summons as she cheered on her summoner.
"Enjoying yourself, Bast-sama?" Tsunade asked, knowingly.
"Of course! And like I told Naruto-chan's mate, you don't have to bother with that sama stuff."
"I'll keep that in mind. What about you, Orochi? You could almost say this fight is about you, if you so wished," Tsunade finished with a teasing tone. Orochi rolled her eyes but said nothing in response, more interested in seeing if Hiruzen could force Naruto to show something new. Tsunade, taking Orochi's silence as a challenge up the ante. "Or can you not even envision a competition for your hand? I mean, who could possibly compete? True love is like that, ya know."
"You sound like an idiot and if Koharu were here she'd agree with me," Orochi spat.
"Pfft, she'd side with me. Don't be embarrassed, Orochi-chan. Love is wonderful, right Bast?"
"Sure is. I'm thinking of taking another lover myself. Gave the last one a heart attack. I put it on him so good."
"That's not unimpressive," Orochi said as even she knew game recognized game.
Elsewhere in the stands sat a conflicted genin. Konohamaru had no idea why his grandfather requested he go to the boss's house but once there he did not like where things went. He was an exuberant and optimistic boy but he was also smart. He knew he was one of the things that kept Naruto-oyabun from lashing out at his grandfather and he could also tell he had no interest in this. He hoped his grandfather didn't push Oyabun too far, he really just wanted this over.
"I believe you underestimate me," Hiruzen answered back to Naruto's call to surrender and Asuma frowned. He understood what his old man wanted but this was likely several years and three schemes too late. But, as was his way, the former Hokage couldn't be reasoned with; add Enma calling for blood there was just simply no way he'd seek an alternate solution. Asuma had his share of issues with his father but he didn't want to see him hurt. He also knew if Naruto got hurt Kurenai would be leading the calls for blood. The bearded Jounin refused to think about what Orochimaru might do.
Reflex, habit, trained response. Whatever one may deem it, Naruto's lungs expanded as they had numerous times before, this time filled with noxious gas until he was ready to unleash his next jutsu. The [Ninja Art: Miasma] was as advertised. A thick, heavy, fog of poison gas was sprayed down below the trees, toward Hiruzen. Knowing what the color of the chakra gas meant, even if he wasn't used to the specific utilization, Hiruzen performed the [Earth Style: Earth Rampart]. The mountainous wall was intended to bring Hiruzen to Naruto's level but the Uzumaki would have none of it. Several of his high-pressure [Water Style: Water Lances] carved through the rock, destabilizing it. Both Hiruzen and Enma fell toward the fog, disappearing from view.
The august shinobi knew to hold his breath, though he assumed the poison gas wasn't lethal it would still be a detriment. He signaled to Enma and the summons transformed to his legendary staff form, spinning over to Hiruzen. Catching his longtime partner, Hiruzen started several mighty swings as the gusts cleared the miasma. Now with some breathing room, Hiruzen took in the air and used a katon jutsu to burn away the rest of the gas.
Hiruzen saw the tri-pronged kunai land beside him. His mind told him to move but his arms gained a sudden amount of weight and his legs lost their sturdiness. His reflexes slowed, his mind was still fast enough to realize the miasma acted as a contact poison, holding his breath hadn't saved him. Soon, he found himself wrapped in a tree, Naruto emerging out of it. He knew it was a genjutsu but Jiraiya stepped in before he could begin to counter it. Having his chakra disrupted a moment later, he saw he was actually wrapped in a tree. He'd just experienced Naruto's [Ninja Art: True Tree Binding Death]. The crowd cheered for the combatants but Hiruzen felt empty. The battle hadn't been fierce enough to resolve things.
He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see Naruto standing behind him. "That was a better fight than Jiraiya normally gives me. You've still got some kick, Old Man," Naruto complimented.
"More than you might realize. Give me a rematch and I might surprise you," Hiruzen said. 'I'm sorry, Naruto, for everything' the unspoken meaning. Naruto looked away for a brief moment as if unsure.
"We'll have to see, Old Man. No promises," Naruto said. 'I know but that's not enough,' Naruto expressed subtextually. Hiruzen nodded and Naruto returned to play up his win for the crowd. Hiruzen knew if he wanted any semblance of a relationship with his former grandson he had to come to a resolution with Orochimaru.