I slept little.
There was no telling if it was the shadows in my room or the thoughts inside my head that kept me from dozing off. So, when my alarm went off early in the morning, I was confused as to whether I slept poorly, or didn't sleep at all.
The computer beeped as I scanned another book. I glanced down at the clock on the bottom right and sighed.
"Long night?" Kate strolled out of the office lugging a large box in her arms.
"You could say that," I barely managed a smile when I yawned.
"It definitely looks like it." She chuckled. "At least you're not the one who's forced to be alone with Arthur." She turned to me abruptly. "Did you know he's been fussing all damn morning about getting me a sex toy as an early birthday gift?"
I snorted loudly. "What?"
"I swear, if a heart attack doesn't kill him first, I definitely will."
"He really wants to get you-"
She put up a hand in front of her. "I don't want to talk about it! It's embarrassing enough to even bring it up."
Kate hastily unpacked the box she brought in and later left.
I spent the rest of my hour doing small mundane tasks here and there, trying to keep my head busy and focused, and yet, it still fixated on the events of last night – the one that followed after I told Aiden that he wasn't alone. He then asked me to stay. He wanted me to talk to him and then listen to the things he had to say. But I knew it wasn't the right time to do so. He didn't have the energy, nor was he in the right state.
His head had begun to lean to one side as his eyes closed, and his words turned into mumbles. I helped him to his bed, where he tried to convince me to stay once more.
"Stay," He voiced. "Please, stay."
Despite battling with myself whether to give in to the urge to lay beside him or not, I decided it was best if I simply left.
Then, barely awake, asked me why I was leaving. And I told him the truth.
"I don't want to lay next to you not knowing where we stand with each other. If I laid next to you now, I have no way of knowing that you won't kick me out the moment you wake up. Or that you won't regret the whole thing."
"I won't." He assured me as his head sank deeper into his pillow.
Once I knew he was asleep, I snuck out of his room.
"Good morning," Arthur said, breaking me out of my thoughts.
"Good morning, Arthur."
Surprisingly, he didn't say much more for the remainder of the day. He too seemed to have his head elsewhere.
Kate reappeared in the afternoon, informing me of the time. She offered to give me the rest of the day off to go home, but I felt the urge to stay. So, when people began leaving, Kate and the other guy who also worked with us, James, sat at the front desk together.
We were all drifting from different topics of conversation as they came across us; it was our way of making time go by faster until closing time.
We all observed as each individual came in or exited the library doors. They even created a new game that consisted of guessing whether the next person we saw was single or not.
"This one has to be married." James subtly watched as a woman in her forties walk by. She was fitted in sweatpants and a sweater with a jean jacket around her waist. She wore pale flats and carried her car keys in her hands.
"Unhappily married," Kate added, giggling.
"You two are so immature." I shook my head, flicking through one of the books I temporarily picked up.
"Okay, Miss Pink and Perfect, what do you think about this guy?" She nodded towards a middle-aged man in a golfer's shirt and khaki pants.
I barely looked at him and shrugged. "I don't know."
"Come on, take a guess." James whispered, "It's more when you're not spectating from the sidelines."
I sighed and looked up to see the man once more, this time analyzing his appearance. He was combing through the science fiction aisle even though his locks of hair constantly fell on his eyes, which would have made that task more inconvenient.
"Married, right?" Kate said, unsure.
"I think he's married." James agreed.
"Not married." I chimed in. "Probably has a fiancé or a girlfriend though."
"How do you know he's not married?" Kate asked.
"There is no wedding ring. And even if there was, there would be a tan line given his age, and there isn't. However, despite his hair being all over the place, the rest of his clothes are clean and steamed, hence there being no wrinkles. This leaves one of two options. One, he's either got an employee to iron his clothes for him. Or two, his partner does it for him."
"I agree with her." Kate leaned toward me.
James narrowed his brows. "What? Just a second ago you were on my side."
"Yes. And now I'm not." She shrugged.
I learned that Kate had been hiding from Arthur and James gave up on fighting his ADHD. Therefore, we played this game until there were only a few people left in the building. We all laughed and mocked each other for the past hour instead of doing our jobs. It was probably the most fun I ever had outside my house with other people.
"Oh," Kate smirked. "Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome at the entrance."
James connected Kate's line of sight and scoffed.
"Girlfriend." He said, confidently.
"Single." Kate giggled like a schoolgirl. "I hope."
When I finally lifted my eyes, I stared blankly. I couldn't think of anything else to do.
He was handsome from the depths of his eyes to the gentle display of dimples.
His black curly hair tumbled on his forehead in the most adorable way and I found myself smiling at him.
"Emma." His lips tugged up into a neat smile.
Kate and James both twisted their heads and looked at me.
I scrambled and clicked on the computer, pretending to do something useful.
"Hi, Aiden."
"I think we should go check on that thing..." Kate muttered, pulling James with her into the office and closing the door. However, I could see from the corner of my eye that the curtain was pulled back somewhat, and she was watching us.
"If you're looking for a book you might want to grab it quickly, we're closing in half an hour," I informed him.
"I didn't come here for a book." He told me, simply.
"What are you doing here, then?" I avoided his eyes.
"Have I done something wrong?" His voice lowered.
"No. Why would you think that?"
"Because you won't look at me."
My fingers froze on the keyboard and my gaze slowly rose to meet his steady, focused look.
"That's better." His features lightened in amusement as if he thought of something funny. "So," He began with a smirk, "You come here often?
A small chuckle managed to escape me and I attempted to hide it as a cough.
He saw through that and leaned forward.
"What are you trying to do?" I half laughed.
He placed his elbows on the desk in front of me and then let his head rest on his hands.
"I'm trying to conquer you with my charms." He paused, noticing my reaction. "Oh my, is that... are you smiling at me?"
I tried to hold in my smile. "Are you trying to flirt with me?"
He leaned forward further, whispering. "Is it working?"
I crossed my arms and welcomed the heat that rose to my face alongside the laughter.
"Why are you really here, Aiden?"
He stood up straight. "You left last night before we could finish talking."
"You mean when you fell asleep?"
"Small details." He swiped his tongue across his bottom lip.
I wasn't used to this playfulness coming from him. I knew him differently than what he was showing me.
"What put you in such a good mood today?"
"I woke up this morning, and the first thing I thought about was you. How I wanted to see and talk to you." He pushed back his curls. "I spent all day looking for you."
"You could have called,"
"I did. You never answered your phone. I figured you were here and had it switched off for work."
I checked and sure enough, he was right.
"Is there any way we can talk after my shift? I have fifteen minutes left."
"Sure. I'll wait." He smacked his lips together. "Looks like I'll be getting a book after all." He nodded and disappeared around the bookshelf.
"Who is that?" Kate re-emerged at my side.
"A friend."
"A friend? He's extremely good-looking and makes you smile like that, and he's just a friend?" Kate raised a brow. "I don't believe you for a second." She sat down beside me. "You're going to see him after your shift ends, right?"
I glanced at her. "Yes, I am."
Kate squealed. "Well, you can go. You've been here since six in the morning, I think it'll be fine if you finish a few minutes early."
"Really?"
"For that hunk of a man? I'd donate my arm."
"He's half your age."
"I don't see your point." She blinked plainly. "Now, go! Or I will!"
She basically pushed me off my chair to go and look for him.
I roamed each shelf trying to find him. I half expected him to be reading some kind of anatomy book and make some inappropriate joke, so I was surprised when I saw him in the fiction area, running his finger along the spine of the hardcover he picked up.
"Hi again."
His head shot up, curious. "Hello. I thought you had a few minutes left in your shift?"
"I did, but Kate – my co-worker – covered for me."
"Right." He placed the book atop the shelf. "Does that mean your free?"
I walked over to him, grabbing the book he had misplaced. He watched me cautiously as I put it back in its designated spot and checked the others around it for similar mistakes.
"Yes, I am."