she smiled the very same smile, Kiara had when I first saw her. I heard my heart drum into my ears and my once aching heart, I felt it dance at her touch. I looked at her hand on my shoulder and then at her face.
I felt like I should run right into her arms and hold her. but I was afraid I would come out as a creep. I smiled. or smirked, I don't know. I couldn't think. "are you okay?"
"no," I answered honestly.
"oh my god, did you cry?" she asked, a little bit amused but I could see the worry on her face.
"uh... i..." words refused to leave my mouth. or from in my head. I was speechless.
"let me help you," she said and put my arm over her shoulder, and helped me walk down the steps towards the cafeteria. my heart... can she hear it? and why was it dancing? why was... why did she look so beautiful this close? we walked into the school clinic and she helped me into the hospital bed as the nurse came to check on me. she told the nurse... damn, her voice is so beautiful.
I looked at her from top to bottom. damn, the girl was made by the mother goddess on her day of rest and the goddesses didn't do things in a rush, she sure did take her time as she created her. her beautiful black African hair was tied in a childish afro on top of her head that made her look a bit childish, innocent and pure. her tiny, small, little chubby head with dimples definitely looked beautiful. her perfectly brown innocent eyes begged to be looked at. her beautiful, friendly smile was on its own amazing.
her mother definitely gave her the perfect size when she made her. her boobs... I blinked twice. what is wrong with me? did I just look at her boobs and perfectly thick ass and actually like it? Did I... I wanted to slap myself. but I liked it.
she held me. I wanted to dance but I was shy. I... she walked out of the room and my heart sank. but watching her leave gave me one view that made me aware of the fact that I was a man. a healthy human male. a hard dick. I thought about her hot ass as her tight jeans held it together.
her plummy ass definitely wanted to be grabbed and... can I hear myself? what am I thinking?
the nurse sat next to me and asked for my name. I gave him my student Id but left my eyes fixed on the door. I touched my sides and recalled the softness of her touch and feel on me. it was odd, I've felt a lot of things on my skin but the feel of her was the most beautiful thing I have ever had on me.
the nurse put a stethoscope on my chest and listened. I did the same, but with my hand. "your heart seems irregular."
"it's trying to fly away." the nurse looked at me like, WHAT? "my heart is dancing."
"I was told you cried. what was wrong?" the nurse asked.
"I am okay." I said, "it was only just a little panic attack." I think I just lied. fuck it. I don't care. I got off the bed and put my shoes on before I walked back to my room. I sat on my bed and thought about what just happened. it still felt like a dream. being held by her.
I opened my computer and started searching for what I felt that very brief moment I saw that girl. I searched my heart skipping a beat, then dancing and the butterflies I felt and... what came up was heart palpitations. I wasn't crushing her or anything. but is it serious? am I dying?
I opened my phone and searched for Shay's number, the alien girl Pelione girl the keeper trained me with. she was my best friend and only friend with whom I could talk about anything.
"shay," I said as soon as she answered. "can I ask you a question?"
"Hello to you too, James. how are you doing?" she said into my ear, as calmly as calm could be. she was angry.
"I am sorry. what did I do?" I asked.
"what did you do? can you think of what you didn't do instead?" the calm was gone but the suppressed need to shout, I knew it, anywhere.
"it's been two years so... I did send you a birthday gift."
"that's all you could do? no, let's have lunch? no... you know what Mr big shot, I may be on the moon right now but it doesn't mean we should not talk to each other."
"I know. I called."
"when?"
"We are talking right now," I told her. isn't it what we're doing? I called and you answered. isn't it what it means to call?
"i... what do you want, Jamie?" she asked me as calmly as she could. I couldn't understand why she was mad earlier either. or was she mad?
"have you talked to the old man recently?" I asked.
"why? What's wrong? is he dying?" she asked in a panic.
"no. I had a question about being human. maybe you can answer it."
"what is it about?"
"heart palpitations."
"what?" she asked. what was I thinking asking her for an explanation? she is not human. at least, she wasn't from this world, but she grew up around me and the keeper. "can you tell me the details and I will try to figure out what it is you meant."
"I just saw someone and my heart skipped a beat. and it hurt. for a moment, like someone was tearing it apart. then I cried."
"YOU WHAT?!"
"I know it was lame and..."
"Lame? Jamie, that's... Why am I not surprised? oh right. you always teared up when Kiara was mentioned in a conversation when we were young. did that person mention her name?"
"no, I just saw her and I teared up. but when she touched me, all of that pain was gone."
"is she a healer?"
"no, that's the odd part."
"so let me get this straight, you felt pained seeing her and you cried?"
"yes."
"isn't that how you feel when you see someone hurt before you turn them into Guardians?"
"It is, partly, but she wasn't hurt, or in any danger. I just heard her voice and I... my heart just tore apart. then I saw her face, and I teared up. but I felt all that pain vanish when she touched me and I felt giddy. still do right now.' I explained.
"darling, she wasn't hurt?" no she wasn't and the thought of seeing her hurt irked me.
"no, and I don't think I wanna see her hurt."
"go see her." she said. "just to be certain that's the only advice I can give you right now. we'll talk after you see her.'
"Okay." I got up and thought about what I was gonna say and everything, but the very thought of seeing her made my stomach feel queasy. it made butterflies fly all around my stomach.
I can do this. I told myself and headed out. but the thought of seeing her face made my heart grow wings and try to fly away. the thought of her cute smile that left dimples on her cheeks made me feel like I could just melt. I walked back to the lecture feeling all weird.
I walked through the back exit into the auditorium with my heart drumming loudly into my ears. as I approached the seat she had occupied earlier, my body didn't feel at all like it was mine. it felt like I was in something ionic. tingling all over. not in a bad way, but in a funny way.
Next to where I sat earlier, there she was, sitting so elegantly like a princess, with her soft hand on her neck as she focused on the lecture and took short notes onto her scribbler.
my knees felt weak as I walked towards her and sat down next to her.
"Sorry, the seat is..." she started and turned to me before she smiled a little. "you are alive," she added in a whisper as she looked at me on my face. I felt my face heat up as her eyes landed on me. I took my head up and locked eyes with her.
then, I saw it.
the very light that shone from Kiara's eyes. I saw it in her eyes. the warmth she carried around her was the very same one Kiara had on her. was she, Kiara reincarnate?