In the
calm
and
deep
forest
of the mind
a wolf can wait
for all eternity
if need be.
I found Arwen like so. It was like a telepathic call. One for a long time- only reached one way. We met late in my life. Most werewolves my age already met their spirit guide. I remember my first shift like it was yesterday.
When it took me a painful forty-eight hours to shift and finally become a wolf... I had one thought, was it all worth it? The exciting wait to become a beast was more thrilling then actually becoming one. It took me almost nineteen years to figure that out.
The shift wasn't what I imagined on first go.
It took time to get use to it.
I was alone without a pack.
And now?
I run with my pack for the first time.
Except...
we're charging straight into battle.
A wolf can feel many emotions especially while running with a pack. Our emotions tie into our communication telepathically and sometimes it's hard to separate your thoughts and feelings from everyone else. It doesn't help when you're at tail length in-between them. You have to be very skilled to figure out how to block off those extra thoughts. I knew that as an alpha, Brendon was struggling. A deep responsibility of an alpha was to care for and listen to his pack's inner- most desires. But, he was also here to lead. Tell us 'no' or 'yes' when we needed a strong mind to oversea our tied-in sea of minds. It was easy for one wolf to think something and then - like a virus make others fall in line.
I read about these experiences from a doctor's journal. It was an extra course I took at college. It was textbook literature on my species. Something documented from a famous doctor. I forgot his name.
But, to actually experience my pack's inner most darkest desires was frightening. Going into battle, I could hear their lustful growls. They were hot for war. Their thoughts locked in on wanting to hunt. A wolf's natural instinct was taking out the last of our humanity.
Hunt.
Kill.
Devour.
Kill.
These very thoughts triggered emotions that brought me back to the thought of Lamia's scent... or Emmett's blood. I wanted to hunt down Lamia the same way I done Emmett. Give her a sort of well deserved revenge. For what she's done to me, my pack, and my family. I wanted to tear her apart and eat her alive.
These emotions were trying to splurge into my pack mates but I tried not to radiate them.
I want to keep them to myself.
Like a dark huntress.
Lamia would only be for me.
I picked up on something as Brendon's alpha pheromones poured out into our pack. I could smell his anger as he stayed near my side. It was like he was eating away my anger like fuel. 'She had the audacity to call and tell me she was the one who... Never-mind... I will be the one to kill Lamia,' he told me. It was like he knew- I was going to go out of my way and hunt down Lamia when we reached Blacktail Growler's pack house. He's a smart alpha.
'You won't be alone,' I told him. 'We can take her down together. What she's done... is unforgivable to us both. She's done us both dirty. If we see her here... We will strike the blow together,' I said to him. There was no way he would try to talk me out of this. We both have reasons to hate Lamia. He can't control me and I can't control him. So we can only work together instead of apart.
Even though it felt like yesterday when I smelled the demonic blood of vampires... I forgot all about it's addictive call. My first time was with Lamia- the second was when I devoured Emmett alive. If I knew then what I know now... maybe things would be different. But, when we reached eye-sight of the open floor planned pack house.... I felt those intense cravings hit me like a slap to my face.
Breathing in the sickening vampire's smell... I could remember the way Lamia's scent hit me. There were injured vampire's here. That was a good sign. It meant that somehow- the wolves must have figured out their bite can kill a vampire. Right? Of course... first thing that would happen in war is that! Figuring out the other side's weakness. Of course the wolves remaining must be blood- crazy. Like I was when I first....
Should I let my pack go through that?
I have to. It's the only way to live.
Vampires smelled like predators. They were somehow around the same place on the flood chain but their scent made us terrified. Because they were both undead and living. Everything about their scent told us they were stronger and better skilled. Fast. They were monsters to us. Something we cannot understand because they do not belong in the forest. Vampire blood was a whole different story from the vampire's scent alone. Because it held the secrets to their being. It was their storage supply. The only thing keeping them running. It was a fountain of youth. It was crave- worthy. Because the taste- is divine. Just the smell alone was hard to resist for me.
But don't forget, this was a demon in disguise.
We cannot stoop low.
We will fight and save our pack.
We will not be lost to this blood show.
I tried to listen to my pack. Their emotions and thoughts tied into a river of sounds. As they tried to understand this intense feeling they received from smelling their first vampire.
I could barely remember Lamia sucking my life force out of me. When she offered her arm- my thoughts eagerly tried to change my memories.
Did I take from her too? No! I didn't try vampire blood until I killed Emmett.
'Keep calm... stay strong for them, Blair.' Arwen could do nothing but try. Her voice soothing like ice on a sore wound. I wanted to turn off emotions and just kill. It didn't matter who my prey was. I liked how it felt... to kill someone. 'Think of Fang! We should find him.'
Arwen was right. I should think only of the good of my people. I will find Fang. He will be okay. He's the greatest warrior this pack ever known.
'Listen up, vampire's have one weakness... If you bite them they will die. Our bite is poisonous to them. So make sure to break their skin. Tear them apart, kill them. Show no mercy to these monsters. They do not deserve to live.' My voice echoed as I told them the one truth. We will win, we have an advantage. We will join what remains of Blacktail and help them win back their territory and lives.
Blacktail Growler's pack house was open floor planned. Meaning most of the outside walls were open windows. The bedrooms were like caves open to the woods. They didn't like outside walls here. I imagined it was cold during the winter. There were white sheer curtains that blocked off the openings. But they were stained red with blood. This pack house was like a big stone cave in the forest. The building growing into a huge cave running up the side of a mountain. The forest was inches from the cave entrance. It was beautiful and hand crafted. They must have worked hard to carve out each room as it entered a bigger cave connection.
We arrived too late.
I could hear the whistling sound of the wind. It was echoing silence. The battle had died down minutes before we could reach it. My throat caught as I saw the bodies. There were a few injured and still breathing- wolves mostly. But the rest were corpses. Vampires and wolves. Pack Blacktail Growlers... must be all dead.
The scent brought a sickening sore into my throat. The more I breathed in the mixed scents of death from both my kind… and theirs… I felt the urge to vomit. Luckily my stomach was a hard rock compared to my other form. It was hard to upset my stomach in this position. I wasn't disgusted all the way. Shamefully, the scent of the vampire's blood still called to me. I tried hard to ignore my instincts.
I want to hunt and feast. I need it... It was a hard craving. But, I wouldn't give in. I have to keep my sense together.
I shook my head as I focused on the bigger problem at hand.
We're too late? There's no way. There has to be something going on much quieter inside... perhaps.
What if we didn't make it and we lost a valuable ally?
We weren't quick enough.
I breathed in a sharp breath.
'No, it can't be,' I whispered out to Brendon. 'We can't be late...'
My heart fell as I felt my pack's sorrow.
'Spread out,' Brendon ordered the pack. 'I want every wolf still breathing to be treated and promised eternal peace with Luna if they cannot be saved.' He froze up as he looked inside at the cave. 'I want my first squad to follow me and the Luna inside. We will be on lead. If anyone spots the alpha of pack Blacktail Growlers do not hesitate to protect or assist.'
'What do we do with the vampires left behind?' My father asked. He of course would be on lead to bring first aid to the wounded.
'We don't take prisoners.'
It was a cold reality. How could we give mercy after seeing this? I looked around at the vampires. Mangled from our animalistic fight. And, the wolves were hacked with bullets and sharp objects. Big enough to cut off limbs. Maybe swords? I could smell the faint scent of wolfbane in the air. A familiar scent stuck on Mal's fur.
'Watch out, there's been wolfbane involved,' I warned the pack. I felt uneasy. For the first time ever, I looked at my father with uncertainty. What if I leave him and come back to find him a corpse as well? He was too worried checking the vampire corpses to notice me looking. He was making sure they were dead. A smart move since we knew for fact they could very well be faking to fool us.
I know... My brother Niall tried to protect his family from Lamia...
But, she sees his threats are empty. He's got nothing to control her by. There Lamia is... Standing firm by what she wants. She's selfish. She doesn't feel emotions and it's her biggest flaw. She won't hesitate to kill any of us because we're standing in her way. She's lived a long life and we're just a spec to her life. But her days are outnumbering themselves.
I will kill her to protect my pack, family, and to free Eder.
Where is Eder? If he can see the future then he should have warned us about this attack on Blacktail. Did something happen and it's keep him from us? I thought... he was on our side.
'We should find Fang,' Arwen suggested. Her voice brought me back from my small concern over Eder. Now- dragging into worry for Fang.
'Yeah, where is he?' I wondered as I smelled the air. I tried to search through the blood stained air to get a grasp on where to go for Fang. But the scents in the air was like a thick fog. Nothing was for certain. I couldn't pick him up anywhere.
The wolves Brendon had asked for circled us, 'This is Eli, Mateo, Issac, Maeve, Issabella, Atlas, Jordan, and Eloise,' Brendon told me as he nodded off in how they stood. Closest vs farthest from us. They were built bulky. Almost Brendon's size and clearly high ranking warriors. These were wolves I would want to guard my own children. Because the built alone promised protection from them.
'It's a pleasure to connect faces with names,' I joked as I nodded towards them. I could clearly tell that with Brendon remembering their names he favored them for important pack duties. This meant they were trusted as well. The ten of us combined would be enough to protect us against anything unexpected. They wagged their tails at my humor. Luckily Brendon let it slide as he lead our way into the pack's den.