I'm going to have nothing when this is all over.
If it's not going to be from Lamia tearing my pack apart and my family to pieces...
It will be because my own family will turn on each other with knives in throats.
Niall wants to protect the family but he doesn't understand how much damage he's actually done to it. My father must feel something fierce towards Niall. Betrayal? Of course. I don't know who will kill him first, but the whole family is out to kill him now. Cal's death will not be forgotten by me. I will confront Niall with it when I see him again. I will ask him why... why did he choose Lamia over his own pack and blood?
I didn't even want to come home this season. Because I thought this life was dull and meaningless. I hate who I am and what I am. I hate this whole damn system. I hate my family. I hate how Vivienne still clings to them with those hopeful eyes that we can all be normal. I wanted her to wake up. Ask me to run away with her. I would follow her anywhere, and I have. When I came home I wanted her to see the pack house alone. Experience it alone and hate it as much as I do. None of this was who we were. Does Niall feel the same way? Is that why he's secretly this whole other being we haven't met?
Despite my feelings...
I never wanted 'home' to blow up like this. I would never wish bad things on good pack members. Family most of all. I believed family was thick like blood. But I don't know anyone I'm actually related to. I lived in the same house as them and they're all so different from who I thought they were. Which makes me hate them even more. They hate their lives and won't do anything to change it. I don't want to live like this anymore.
I promise, when I live after this... I plan to find a cure.
'You were born, stupid. There is no cure.' Moro's voice echoed in my head like he was here with me. Somewhere inside me. But, I could sense he wasn't here. He must be listening to my thoughts.
'The moon goddess can bless my disease away. I can find out how she does it. Maybe from a witches' brew.'
'You would get rid of me?' He sounded sad. But, he knew all along how disappointed I've been to have this curse. I wish I was half human. That, I got the chance to live as one and never worry about mates or pack duties. All this responsibility sucks. I didn't ask for any of it.
I was gifted this life by fate. I was given a chance to make a difference, even just a small amount. Fate works in mysterious ways. I believe she mated Emmett and Vivienne for a reason. They were destined to reject each other. I believe Vivienne and Brendon were destined to cross paths. I believe Vivienne is leading her own life by fate's desires. That's the way I want to live. I want her to just come with me when I leave. I want her to realize she HAS a choice. She doesn't have to be Luna. She doesn't have to be with someone from this pack.
I'm going to figure out a way to break free from the werewolf's curse. I swear I will not fall in love with Eder when I see him. I will not focus the rest of my life wanting to please him. I will break free from fate like my sister did. Even if it means rejecting him. I will be my own person.
I'm sorry fate.
I don't want whatever you've got planned for me. I'm going to save my sister and get the hell out of this pack. Even if that means finding a way to make sure Brendon doesn't survive this war? I'm not sure I can be that dark... But, I don't think I can support that selfish bastard being my brother in law. Not when he literally didn't consider her feelings when trying to make her pack Luna.
Luna. What a silly role. It literally means breeder. That's all the role is. I don't want my sister in that role... Anymore then I want to see my mom choosing to be one. I can't believe they think those alpha's love them. Love is the way I've watched over my sister with care all these years. It's dedication and quiet. It's sneaky but sure of its self. I know for fact I love my sister and I don't want anything bad to happen to her. I want her to find love... I want her to find herself... I want her to see there is more then just going back home after college to breed and settle.
"What are you thinking so hard about?" Fang asked me as we went through a maze of halls. This castle we entered was rotten. It smelled like it hadn't been lived in but death carried it's scent well. The wood moshed under my paws and made me almost afraid as I walked around holes. Even in sprit form I was afraid to fall. There was mold growing in cold dark places. Dust on the hall paintings and cobwebs carrying dead spiders in the corners.
"Don't they have servants?" I grumbled.
"Lamia kept the palace like this ever since she came. She kept everyone away. If Eder asked for someone to come in and remodel of fix something... they didn't come back out alive." I looked Fang over as I couldn't believe this. Eder literally lived in a castle like this? All these years? I wasn't actually here physically. but I felt utterly disgusted walking through it. I wanted a shower. "Her crazy idea to control everything around Eder is dangerous. You should never give it out during the war that you two are mates. She'll focus everything she has at you."
It's good to know that if I have to give up my life- it would be as easy to say, 'hey I feel a physical desire for your husband. Drop everything you're doing to kill me instead.' It was like a trump card. I could use it to the pack's advantage and kill Lamia.
"Now that you know your mother is alive and in a different pack from your father, will you change packs to spend time with her after all this?" Fang asked me. It was strange how open to his own thoughts he was with me. I growled.
"I don't care about her. She wasn't the one there raising me. She didn't tie my shoes or put my jackets on before school. She didn't make my meals, check my closets for monsters, or read to me. She's not my mother. Just somebody my father once loved. She doesn't mean anything to me." It was a blunt and honest truth. I only care about one person, Vivienne. Even if she barely notices me... I know she's different from everyone else. She's my big sister.
I wouldn't be back home if it wasn't for the fact I've got to see it through that Vivienne gets what she wants. Rather that's to stay here with Brendon or go with me. I want to show her the world. I want to give her more then Brendon ever could.
Fang stopped outside of a door. The scents around me told me we were at our destination. Inside, he would be there. I looked towards Fang with uncertainty as he walked through the door first. His tail crossing the through last and leaving me alone. I loved how in this form, the sky was the limit. I felt so free. I stepped through the door with him. My body going straight through something solid, scared me. But I couldn't feel it. I could only feel the ground. The air. I could smell the vampire, Eder. Everything in me spun. I felt weak as I caught onto his heavy scent in the room.
Eder was a strange scent for me. Because it warned me, of foul and decay. He was a walking corpse to my nose. There was nothing but the scent of other's blood mixed to his. Virgin female humans, was clearly his favorite snack. I picked up on those scents easily and felt jealous. This was danger, written all over the air. This man was a predator and if I was a female, I WOULD run. He obviously had no respect for the sex, except to see them as snacks. How did Lamia get away with dominating him? This beast had no emotions. It was just pure hunger. He was a hunter.
I can not love him. I will not fall for him when I look at him. These feelings mixed into his scent was void from anything a pack taught me. This man, could very much be breathing out mixed signals. This was a vampire's true scent and nature. They do not feel. They're monsters that toy with their kill. When I look at him I have to remember this. I will not forget what I've learned from training. Scents hide emotions. Wolves can smell these things... we are on a different level. We have an upper hand.
The coding of his scent left me blind. I was smelling the delicious breakthrough of his 'mate' call. The desire of my favorite scents locking down into one. Everything that made up who he was, told me we were meant to mate. I didn't like it at all. I was after all, a free spirit. Luckily I wasn't actually here. Or, I would be in bigger trouble. I wouldn't be able to stay so calm.
The room we stood in was dark. The only lighting coming from the fire place. My eyes adjusted to the dark and I could instantly tell where we were. This was his private bedroom. Lamia's scent didn't even dare to touch this room. There was a platform with a lavish expensive satin bedding dipped down into a water bed. His room had a fish tank wrapped around his room. It had a bunch of tropical fish in it but was very quiet. Like the glass was sound proof. The lighting was black lights to keep it dark in the room. There were no windows. This made be believe, Eder couldn't touch day light. Maybe he was a vampire allergic to it. I couldn't imagine him busting into flames in a morning's light. Somewhere in a flower field? No- don't think like that. His room was decorated in old antiques. Eder, to me seemed like he wanted to swim in an ocean. His favorite color was blue. I could tell by the color arrangements in his room. He loved fish. There was paintings of oceans, sunsets, sea creatures, and light houses. He probably dreamed of running away to a beach or an island to live. His private room was so deep in his desire for sea life.
Eder sat at a glass table in front of the fire place. He was reading a book but looked up from it when we walked in. His eyes met mine and I wanted to break. He had this soft side to him that I could connect to. His room told me he wanted to run away. I knew how he felt in an instant.
He was trapped.
"This is a surprise," he whispered softly. He stood up quickly. Eder was dressed in a black cloak. Something he must use for shelter in the sun. He had bags under his eyes and it made me curious if he had to sleep to live as well. His hood was off to reveal what I saw in the painting. Except it was real. He was here before me. Shinning like a star. His hair was long and platinum blonde. His face actually held expressions, something I didn't expect out of him since his scent... He must feel some form of humanity in him. His ears pointed and long was strange but welcoming for me. I liked how different he was. He looked like a pale beautiful flower. His eyes were even a sea green, which made me love him even more. His height was probably taller than my human form. "You should have stayed there in Blacktail's territory." He looked sad then. "Lamia scent troops to the territories." He sat back down suddenly and looked weakened. Like he was drained of energy.
Fang growled in alarm as he walked up towards him. "Eder, what do you see?" He asked eagerly. I stayed by the door, not sure what to do. He didn't even... acknowledge me? Tell me we were soul mates... anything?
"I see...." Eder held his head in the palm of his hand. "Death. People dying," he hissed out in pain. "It's happening again. Lamia will finish what she started," he mumbled.
"What's her plan?" Fang's voice wasn't angry at Eder. Instead he looked at Eder like he was an old friend. He was asking for his help.
"She will start with both the Blacktail Growlers and the Everfur Howlers."
"What will happen?"
"She has the surprise advantage. She will kill half if not all of the packs."
"We're in Blacktail Growlers," I whispered towards Fang.
"Do we have time to escape?" Fang blurted out. Eder looked at us with uneasiness.
"You will make it back in time. But, your own strength and speed will decide if you can make it out alive. If you do, you have to go straight to Alpha Brendon and give him the warning, she is coming to your territory last."
I felt fear rising in my chest. So time is at my throat? I have a message to deliver and I'm on a set time frame. I just don't know if I can make it in time or not. Will I even make it out of Blacktail Growler's territory alive?
"Lamia's army has evolved since you last fought with them," Eder warned Fang. "They developed a serum to be immune to werewolf bites as long as it's in their system. So, tell them to strike with an intent to kill."
"I will," Fang said softly.
I know what happened between the two. And, Fang seems just like nothing happened. He doesn't blame Eder. Even though Eder was a coward the first time around. And, he still is. He's still sitting here and not stopping Lamia.
A knock came from the door. I snapped my head towards it to see a male walk in with a tray of tea. He walked through me and to the table. He bowed respectfully and poured Eder a cup. "Lamia said she would be out late," he informed Eder politely. "She said not to wait up for her and to get some rest."
"Yes, thank you." Eder told him. "That is all tonight, Andrew. Please take some time to yourself." He told him to dismiss him. Andrew bowed his head before walking away. That male must be a butler... Someone that's been kept around longer then the others. What a surprise. Eder waited a few minutes before speaking to us. "You better not stick around any longer here." He picked up the tea cup and smelled it. "She slipped poison into the tea, she means to kill me." I stepped towards him quickly in shock as I watched him take the drink and down it like a shot glass.
"Eder, no!" I shouted. How could he be stupid? He knew it was poison.
"Why would she do that?" Fang asked.
"I suspect it's because Niall told her to kill me," Eder said but looked relieved. He looked happy, like he had been waiting for this moment. Is this what he wanted all along? To die without getting to try to know me? I could forgive him if he asked! Eder started to cough then as he covered his mouth. When his violent coughs stopped he tore his hand away to reveal blood dripping down his cheek. He looked at us in exhaustion.
"I don't understand... she cherishes you," Fang mumbled. "She wouldn't kill you. But, she would definitely make it look like she did if someone she's manipulating asked her to."
"I'll be waiting here," Eder whispered to us. "If you win. Come wake me up."