What comes first? Love or Death?
I pondered on this question as my life flashed before my eyes. I was in my bed. Bit as soon as I closed my eyes, I wasn't there anymore.
Now what lay stood in front of me was... Father.
Father, with a baseball bat in his hands looking eagerly towards me as I kneeled down and picked up the ball with what seemed like a tiny hand and threw it at him.
The ball...
He missed it deliberately. He smiled and said, 'Oh well, no one can beat my son in pitching.
Not even me a long time winner - retired athlete' . He had a well built jawline alongside a strong trunk for a base.
His eyes always looked high up and his mustache was well trimmed. With a smile on his face. He looked at me. But he didn't really say anything.
Finally to break the silence, he was about to say something... But before his words could reach me,
The scene shifted.
I was now in front of Becky. Her hairs were blonde and just like how I had always seen them, 'uncombed and short'.
She looked at me...
But where was I?
I wasn't in the park with my father anymore, I was in HELL with all these vile UNDEAD DEMONS looking at me with hunger in their DEAD eyes.
Becky was there.
The worst of them all, smiling as she looked at me from above.
'Oh look the mighty one has fallen'. She would say and laugh.
Others would laugh with her.
It was all pretty simple.
They were all PUPPETS, Becky was their MASTER.
She would pull the strings and they would sing.
She would pull the strings and they would dance.
She would pull the strings and they would DIE.
DIE with laughter and joy on their faces.
With those filthy vile SMILES.
Becky slowly kneeled down towards me.
'So tell me Tiger, how does it feel to be hunted?'.
'Where is your MOMMY now? Eh PRINCESS !!!??? ', another one of the undead spoke.
Becky looked at him with blood shot eyes and a smile on her face.
A smile, but one that was so cold it burned.
They boy went silent.
Then she looked at me and smiled again.
You know, for a boy with an Olympic runner for a father, you are too scrawny and not to mention pathetic.
She continued to look at me that way till the recess ended with the HOWL OF A THOUSAND DOGS.
Then she got up from my chest and along-side everybody, she left me alone.
Just like every single day before and after that day. From the start to the end of a certain phase in my loathsome life.
The scene shifted again.
And once again Becky was on top of me.
But this time for a different reason.
It was her Bedroom.
"this is a memory from one of those many Saturday nights it seems", I thought to myself.
Becky again glared at me.
But this time her tone, her eyes, her hair... they were all much different.
Her hair were combed and well placed. Her lips were redder than usual with her watering tongue making a surplus sound coming out of her mouth.
Her eyes were bluer than usual.
Or maybe it was the illuminous shade of shadows that swirled around the room.
Making the details far picturable than they really were.
'I LOVE YOU, CARL', she said in a lustful tone as she lay on my unmoving body.
Her naked body rubbing me all over.
Covering me in her intense smell and sweat.
'DO YOU HATE ME CARL? for what I do to you in front of my friends? Do you hate me for that?', this time her voice wasn't desiring.
It sounded much melancholic, far too soft and feminine, so feminine that I nearly forgot it was her voice.
It was too desperate and shaky to be hers, but alas it didn't matter.
In that moment, in that instant. I wanted to say I hated her...
But I just couldn't.
Just like I couldn't say anything to anyone.
Being unable to speak... It just wasn't something I was capable of doing.
So I did the next best thing I could. I looked her straight in the eyes.
For a while I heard only the sound of our flesh churning within the oceans of feelings we could not really describe.
The sound of flesh ripping apart.
Of meat being pealed off of skin.
The sound of sex.
Then moments later, she broke the silence once again.
This time with laughter. 'your eyes, they are always so dead you know...
I have always loved em like this. Dark like your hairs. When I see you in light, something about it doesn't feel right.
I just want to see you in darkness'.
As soon as I heard those words, I lifted my left hand, and within the bounds of our own very devised secret sign language, I said OK.
Becky during our middle school, was the one who came up with the idea.
But I was the one who gave meaning to the words, and some of the words...
HAD DOUBLE MEANINGS.
Becky was the only person I ever connected to other than my father.
MOTHER was non-existent.
And with time FATHER became ABSENT.
As for Becky, she changed. As soon as we hit the era of change, She changed.
Her social circle expanded.
She flipped completely over me. Atleast in front of certain people.
This all changed when we were alone.
When we were alone, she would let me touch her body.
Her hourglass shaped figure...
Her face...
Her soul...
She bared it all in front of me...
In the light she was a different person, a DEMON I wanted EXORCISED.
But at night, she was still a DEMON.
Just one I did not want EXORCISED.
Each week I would live through 5 days of HELL, just to get those 2 days of HAPPINESS.
But one day...
The HAPPINESS ceased to be...
Becky Died.
But so did the DEMON. And so did the HELL.
At that time everyone wondered where'd the PUPPET MASTER go?
I was the only person who did know about what happened to the one who pulled the strings, the PUPPETS did ask me a million times.
I just could not talk.
I was not allowed to talk.
And now after all this time as I lay down on my bed, I intend to take that secret down in my grave, In OUR GRAVE.
The peeling of flesh from the bones, the churning of meat inside of our hearts, the sound of love...
OH, you wanna know the secret of what I did to Becky???
Sorry, can't tell ya or it won't remain a secret... Just know.
One Saturday night, while trying to become one...
The 3 of us...
WE ENDED UP BECOMING ONE...