As bright as the memories of the sunny day she's remembering, her heart too felt bright.
Even if it was a memory, she could still smell the mild fragrance of the wildflowers that bloomed on the little hill right next to the wheat fields.
"You made everyone laugh at me!" she threw a rock at the man running away from her at incredible speed.
"He too laughed at me..." she mumbled and her heartbeat quickened. She patted her cheeks and composed herself.
"Babies are not delivered by storks, are they, Tubby?"
He dodged that rock by bending backward, sliding his feet through the grass. With his hand on the ground, he made a turn and sprung up.
[He's such a skylark!]
She thought seeing him showing off his skills. She was about to admire him but his snarky smile put her off.
"Who asked you to believe everything I say, huh?" with a hearty chortle, he stuck out his tongue at her.
Noticing the distance between them reducing, he then turned and started to run.
She gritted her teeth realizing that she cannot catch him by running behind him. She used to be the strongest among them both but as they grew up, he started to develop muscles and he got stronger than her, naturally.
She wouldn't say that she got weaker after puberty. But the rate at which they got stronger became different. He lost his baby weight and his shoulders became broader as his voice turned deeper. He ate the same as her but his muscles ended up getting harder and more pronounced which was hard for her to achieve.
Both of them joined the Knights academy at the same time and it was then she could see the difference between them getting more pronounced.
And although they have stopped growing now that they are over twenty, he still is getting stronger than her.
Her sword techniques got better but he got much stronger than her; enough to beat her at times.
Well, it is what it is! He must be working hard secretly. That cabbage head has grown to be a tricky bloke!
It was a dream but she could feel what she felt as that memory happened.
She is jealous of her friend!
But she soon got over it. Because, no matter what, she won't regret being born a woman. Because only then she can spend the rest of her life with 'him'.
But, Tubby... he still is the same.
She decided to use the trick that always worked on him.
"Ahhh!" she screamed and knelt on the ground holding her ankle. With her face twisted in pain, she started sniffing.
Tubby stopped running and turned back.
She saw the distress he had on his face seeing her in pain and smiled hiding in her knee. It's his reflex to run towards her when she is in trouble.
He is her best mate!
"You, coxcomb! Can't you be careful?" he turned and started to run towards her. "Leering at someone in the battlefield not caring for the enemies, and now you can't even run?"
"But you were there," she grinned, and his expression softened.
"I was there but can't you be more careful? Is it not enough you stopped talking altogether around others to hide your voice, should you give up your life leering at that guy?" a shadow formed under his eyes, and his eyes lost their luster as he got angry.
"And I told you that you cannot enter the battlefield if-"
"Tubby!" she felt her heart beating fast and her palms sweated as he touched her nerve. He had supported her unconditionally; he even joined the academy for her and helped protect her secret. But when it comes to Luke, he...
"You cannot lose who you are for~"
"Tubby! Enough!"
She didn't want to continue that conversation and she could sense the disturbance around her rising. The ground around her shook and the air around her started to get heavy.
She woke up.
Blinking her eyes, she looked around. The room was dim and a big hand was wrapped around her waist. A thick duvet was covering her shoulders and she was warm; a little too warm.
In that dim light, she saw the one they said was the Brute, lying beside her, facing her.
[He doesn't act like a Brute with me though... It's because he thinks that I am Felixa... By the way, what is his name? How should I call him?]
Her fingers itched to touch his cheek that was bright even in that dim light. Looking at him, she felt the familiar feeling... the thumping of her heart.
She turned to the other side not wanting to think about him. He cannot be hers anyway. It is better not to develop any feelings for him. Just maintaining a good relationship with him would be enough.
She saw the translucent bird she saw before still lingering beside her. Not wanting to look at the hostile bird, she closed her eyes.
[I was a woman who hid that I am a woman to train to become a Knight. I fought in battles and it seemed like I did it all for Luke..? Was he the King? Then why did I betray him? Was it because he refused me? What happened to Tubby?]
[And if I am here in what seems to be the future, then is Luke here too? And Tubby?]
Her mind got confused by all the thoughts.
[I wish Tubby is here with me like before...]
She doesn't remember much from her past but from what she remembered and the feelings she experienced around Tubby, she could say for sure that he was very protective of her and was her best friend.
Being in this unfamiliar place with uncertainties and dangers around her, her heart yearned for the one person who was there for her all the time.
Her confusing thoughts clouded her mind like dark gloomy clouds that rest atop a mountain hiding the sun. There was no wind around and everything looked gloomy and still.
The flowers started to wilt without the sun and their gentle fragrance waned; so did the splendor of their petals.
Standing at the foot of the mountain that cast dark shadows curtailing the life of everything around her, she looked above.
[Where is hope?]
Closing her eyes, she took in deep breaths to shirk off that gloomy scenario in her mind. She wanted to go back to the place where there was bright sunlight, fragrant flowers, and the scenery of the ears of wheat dancing to the tune of the breeze.
[I used to be happy there...]
For the second time after she woke up here, she felt the urge to cry.
This time was out of loneliness.
The feeling of loneliness is like the little termites that could bore holes in strong oak trees making them hollow and weak to their core after all. It could break even those with stronger minds.
And she... was vulnerable as a brittle branch waving in the strong wind, having no place to call home.
She too had feelings, after all.
She almost winced as she felt the big, warm hands reaching for her waist. Without pulling her closer to him, he scooted closer.
His warm lips pressed on her cheek. "Sleep," he whispered in her ear as his warm chest pressed on her back.
She pretended she didn't hear it although her shivering eyelids would have revealed the truth.
She thought he might laugh or mock her but there was only silence.
And in that silence, she fell asleep once more. And this time, she had a deep, dreamless sleep.