Joshua looked at me dangerously. Obviously, I had hit the nail on the head by reminding him about Dr. Elizabeth, and I couldn't care less about what he thought about it.
"Bethy and I are just friends now",he said and I cringed at the use of his nickname for her. I knew it was silly of me to react that way, but I couldn't help it.
He might have noticed my cringing as he chuckled and said,"Are you jealous Issy?"
I was got offguard at that and shook my head furiously and quickly said,"Jealous? Why should I be jealous about you getting back together with your ex? It doesn't affect me in any way".
Maybe it was the way I said or how I quickly came to my defence, but he didn't seem to be convinced, and only replied,"Mmhmm".
I was now so irritated at myself for letting my emotions take control over me and helplessly asked him,"Do you want to have some tea? Coffee?"
"I'd rather have this interesting discussion we are having now Issy",he said and I wished I could be at the park, dipping my feet into the pond and enjoying the bliss.
But here I was, discussing about exes and defending myself about not being jealous on seeing him with his ex.
Sure, we had shared some of our most intimate secrets with each other, and I felt drawn to him somehow, but why would he need to come to my house to tell me that he wasn't dating his ex? And why was I defending myself about not being jealous of Elizabeth when clearly, I was.
"Blame it on my pregnancy hormones for messing up everything",I thought to myself.
"Issy, I don't know if you've noticed or not, but I'm actually not good with words", he said when he saw that I wasn't saying anything.
"I've only shared about my family stuff to Elizabeth and you. Elizabeth,because we've dated each other for almost six years,but you..",he paused for sometime, and I held my breath.
'What about me?',I thought.
"With you, I felt comfortable enough to spill it even though I had known you for just a few days.",he said and looked at me with an expression I couldn't quite make out.
"I like you Issy",he said after a long pause and I literally felt my jaws drop open. He chuckled at my reaction and looked at me as if expecting me to say something other than looking at him with a startled expression.
I didn't even know what to answer as I liked him as well, but the whole exes thing was still troubling me, and I didn't want to rush in to something that I wasn't completely sure of.
"Joshua, I..",I started to explain, but he stopped me in between, probably sensing my hesitation and he said, "Issy, I like you and that won't change even if you don't confess your feelings. I feel like you feel the same way towards me, but I know right now, you have a lot of unresolved issues to deal with. I assure you, Elizabeth and I are over and we are just friends who work together".
"Umm,, thanks for understanding my predicament. After the whole thing with Roy, I do have some trust issues",I said and gave him a rueful smile.
"You're right, I do like you as well, and I didn't mean to, but I felt jealous at how perfect you two looked together",I said to him honestly.
He chuckled at my confession and gave me a lopsided grin, and I shrugged while telling him, "What,its just the plain truth. There you were, with the perfect human Barbie, chatting away happily and looking so perfect like you were made for each other, and how plain I am and so very pregnant, and all my trust issues and.."
Before I could complete my sentence, his lips were on mine, silencing any word that could come out of it.
The world around me went blank as his lips brushed mine, softly and delicately and just long enough for me to inhale a hint of his after shave,tingling my nose and giving me an odd sensation I had never felt with Roy.
With Roy, there was never a foreplay, and he had never kissed me like Joshua was kissing me now, which I couldn't deny, that I was liking it.
When Roy's thoughts surfaced in my mind, realization hit me as I was comparing his kiss to Roy's and it wasn't fair. He noticed my sudden change and stepped back.
I hadn't even realized when he had stood up and come to my side and kissed me, but now, he was letting go of me, because of my stupid emotions yet again.
"Issy, I'm not sorry for kissing you", he said shamelessly and I giggled.
What? Since when did I start giggling?,I scolded myself and just as I was going to tell him that I didn't mind it either, I heard a set of giggles coming from Gabby and Aurora, as they were watching the show Joshua and I was giving.
"You two carry on with what you were doing earlier and Joshua, by the looks of it, Issy didn't mind it either",Gabby said, adding to my embarrassment and Aurora took her away to the room.
I sighed helplessly and Joshua only laughed out at their antics, which only frustrated me even more.
'What was I doing? Didn't I just resolve to not be attached with anyone from the opposite gender? What was I doing kissing Joshua and complicating things!', I thought to myself and fumed.
"Issy, we'll talk about this thing between us ok?",he said, gesturing between us and probably meaning about the sensual kiss that we had shared just moments ago.
"Okay",I managed to say, not finding words to say . He gave out a chuckle and placed a kiss on my forehead and left before I could gather my senses on what actually happened.
Dr. Joshua Williams had kissed me and I couldn't keep my mind off that kiss. If only the comparisons between Roy and Joshua had not entered my mind, I don't know how long the kiss would have lasted.
If I continued like this, I would end up getting my heart broken again, but was I already too late to get off the Joshua boat now?