"You know I forget the name of this town so much I'm just gonna call it Cocaine. Because of how active and stupid some of the shit that happens here is."
"Rion… surely it's not that bad?"
"Sooo where's a good place to eat? Don't really care about this place's weird happenings. Unless you get mauled, then I'm mauling everything."
Shrugging I guided them to a restaurant owned by an old world war two couple. One Anya Oliwa-Blazkowicz and Bj Blazkowicz a rather strange but funny couple. Bj acts like a big old grizzly but to his wife he's a teddy bear. Anja is a scary medical practitioner who didn't bother working at a hospital, instead she opened a restaurant with her husband. An odd but respectable choice. Their daughters Jessie "Jes" and Zofia "Soph" Blazkowicz are frankly gangsters that solely protect the restaurant.
The restaurant is called Hardy Blazko with a rather cartoony BJ looking grumpy. Though their pet is a BEAR called Rufus Ripper Blazkowicz so there's that. How they legally own it I have no fucking clue but it's Cocaine town it's not the strangest! Speaking of Rufus the old black grizzlies head shot up hearing my footsteps, that I'm making on purpose to be normal. Seeing me, Suì-Fēng, and Pschent walking towards the doors he's laying beside the old bear sits up. Paws raised up into the air as he makes… happy bear noises? Looking to Pschent she cackles at something.
"He said "Cub welcome back, if you don't hug me I'm going to follow you inside and steal your food before giving you a kiss!" It's honestly adorable that you seem to have made the big old grandpa there like you. He smells of blood and death, of multiple Humans and beasts."
Looking at Rufus I ignored the smirk on Suì's face and walked up to the old bear. Spreading my arms I hugged the bear who hugged back trying to crush my spine playfully. After an awkward five minutes of hugging, with bear slobber in my hair. I was released with grandma Anya standing in the doorway smirking, a towel in her hands. Sighing I took the towel and dried my hair out with a smirk.
The older Human woman smiling and cooing at Rufus with a loving look towards her second big teddy bear. This family is weird but it's why me and mom like coming here before I suddenly disappeared for so long. Which she explained as going to live abroad with family for a while. So yeah I looked twenty something but Human age wise I'm eighteen. Soul wise I'm two hundred twenty-two years old, I'm practically young and spry. Pschent is a hundred ninety-eight, and Suì-Fēng is two hundred and fifty-four years old. So we're all pretty young, essentially teenager's to most souls.
"Little Zero it's been so long since I've seen you. How are you doing? Did you see your mother yet? Oh my I see you also have some lovely ladies with you! Which is your girlfriend?"
Sighing at grandma Anya I looked her dead in the eyes exasperated given this old ladies reputation.
"These are my wives I met abroad in America, the one with a shy scowl is Suì-Fēng who lived in Kyoto before moving to Arizona. The hyperactive one with a feral grin and looks ready to possibly bite me from embarrassment is Pschent. She lived in a small village called Anubis in Egypt that worshipped the God Anubis. When I and Suì met her she lived in New York with her parents Anu and Arrow, a rather lovely couple. They'll be living with us occasionally if work doesn't have them traveling around the place. After all, we're running a hitman and animal rescue service."
Grandma Anja smirked at us and giggled at my explanation, not at all bothered by the kill business thing. Instead she clapped her hands together seeing how red the two became because one had her job pointed out, one got called a rescue, but both know my personality so it's embarrassing yet endearing in a way I spun such a tale that included how we met. However, grandma's words made them audibly whine with embarrassment.
"Oh that's just adorable! It reminds me how my husband and I met! With him being a soldier rescued and brought to my hospital while being like a wounded animal determined to survive. So it's very adorable and endearing with how your situation is. You fell for a killer who seems very happy and willing to murder a whore for your safety, and animal rescuer as well. Treat those ladies right young man or I'll have to talk with you about how to treat a woman."
The three blanked before Pschent asked something logical.
"You don't mind he's married to us both? Isn't that usually frowned upon in most of the world?"
Anya gave the currently Human looking hybrid beast an affectionate smile. Her eyes looked at the trio softly as she spoke words that shocked and scared the girls slightly. Medical people can be scary and very sharp, so don't anger them; they have all the knowledge needed to cripple and kill you without much effort.
"Oh dearie it may be frowned upon by Humans but Jūki holders, Shinigami, Beasts, Quincies, Hollows, Full Bringer's, and many others can have the rare multiple lovers. My Husband although a Jūki like little Lara and Zero, is a very loyal one woman man. Zero seems content with just you two and will probably murder anyone else dragged into your marriage. After all, a Jūki called Nobunaga who lives in Mount Fuji is like that, he had two wives he loved more than anything and a jealous whore broke him. Now he has lived isolated from the world for more than six hundred years.
As Jūki's are a volatile bunch given their old lives usually revolving around war and death. So don't worry I fully accept your union if it makes Zero happy and relaxed aside from ready for constant war. So please treat him well. I know his old life and traumas as my husband shares a general deal of similarities. He's a good child but his past, if you haven't noticed, always has his muscles ready for action and his mind is probably creating and erasing multiple simulations, likely of how this conversation will end and what is likely to happen next.
So while he'll try to make you girls happy the best a damaged soldier can. You must also help him and make him not ready to jump into kill something every second of the day. Now I believe you all want some food so come come let's fill those stomachs. Especially because one of you is a pregnant Beast Noble carrying I'd say three little ones from your stomach outline."
Zero followed the old woman with the two women silently following, digesting that tangent. When they thought to ask how a Human knew this all a bloody crimson aquamarine eye appeared beside her head then vanished. The women stilled at that with Suì-Fēng whispering in dread at WHAT she really is.
"She's a Progenitor of the Jikininki or in American terms… a Wendigo…."
Hearing her Pschent blinked before questioning if this is safe given their reputations. Zero however looked at a menu nearby before asking the older woman for some things off it. Seemingly fine with the fact the old Human is actually a man eating monsters.
"Can I get a pepper jack hamburger, a grilled chicken sandwich, ten egg rolls, a chocolate cake slice, and a root beer? While I'll let you decide on what would help pregnant people as one's primarily a carnivore, the other secretly likes sweets but is shy about showing it. Also given you've seen through them already so you know what they'd need grandma, though they figured you out as well. Teasing them like that to seem fair when you could've just said it or showed your real form."
The fact their husband is taking this in stride while bantering with the old woman. Makes them realize he knew that she was a potential threat yet never mentioned that she lived in this town. Which means there are possibly more threats in this ordinary town than Shinigami criminals, Hollows, Shinigami Hollow hybrids, Jūki carriers, and a Beast resident. That he just won't mention… that is worrying to them.
Just what town did their husband post himself in? And will they need to worry about potentially the end of all life in this town? Pschent looked intensely at her husband and decided as she has no real responsibility in the Egyptian branch, she'll assess how dangerous this town is.
Because she'll rot in Hell before she lets this go and he possibly dies from unreported dangers! Speaking of Hell from what Suì-Fēng has mentioned, he's been to it to retrieve something. Which explains the rather cursed scars in parts of his body, a Warden or Overseer possibly caused them.
However, that begs the question on what did he get that warranted possibly an Overseer to attack him?