Zulfa smiled sweetly when she saw dirty plates and glasses whose contents were not left on the table, the food that was served to Farel had already run out.
After a long hope, Farel finally ate her homemade food. Although the level of difficulty is very high to cook this one menu --because she also has to pay attention to the level of doneness--, she will do various ways to make the man continue to eat the food.
However, before the happiness stopped again, Zulfa's eyes saw a lump of purple paper in the trash. She seemed familiar with the paper, which had crumpled to a crumpled and shapeless shape.
Ah yes, that's the letter she wrote to Farel on purpose. And yes, the man threw it away without thinking about Zulfa's feelings at all. She wanted to feel a happiness that was even longer than the 'homemade food her husband devoured'. Not just a moment of happiness, perch and then go away. She didn't want to feel that way.
"Farel?" Zulfa tried to call the figure who was now lying on the bed. That upright body with a dignified posture was probably trying to enter a dream.
Zulfa knew that Farel hadn't slept, as evidenced by the reflection of the cellphone light which was visible even though the man had his back to her. One thing she knew, Farel tried to ignore it. Have cell phones always been an attraction for everyone on this earth?
No answer.
"Do you like my cooking?" asked Zulfa who was still not satisfied with Farel who was silent without an answer.
No more answers. Zulfa saw the man was busy typing and replying to someone's message. There's no need to guess who it is, it's clear that it was the girl who came first to Farel's heart. Pity. She had lost so far, but still tried more and held on...
"Shall I cook another steak tomorrow, for you?" Zulfa asked, she was still asking the same thing. Yes, this is indeed her duty as a wife, a wife who struggles alone.
Farel's loud breath was heard, Zulfa's body stiffened as the man turned and glared at her as if he wanted to kill her immediately.
"You'd better not have to cook. It doesn't taste very good," said Farel tang of course saying everything with the spice of lies. He just doesn't want to because Zulfa will get used to serving him food, it could turn him away from Rani. No, it won't. He had promised himself to take care of his heart until the time he could make the woman who was a wife quit his life suddenly.
Zulfa raised an eyebrow as a sign of not understanding, even though the contents of the plate and glass were empty. What if Farel didn't eat it? "But the steak I made on your plate has run out, there's nothing left. Does it taste bad?" She asked who did not believe what Farel said.
After all, reality pulled her into the realistic space, that the food she had served earlier had run out.
"I threw it away," said Farel with a cold face. He spoke in an unconcerned tone about 'throwing' the food Zulfa served him, even though he threw it in his rumbling stomach earlier and had probably now entered the digestive system.
Zulfa raised an eyebrow, hearing those words made her defenses begin to weaken. "Are you serious? My food, where do you throw it?" She asked hoarsely. Don't cry, don't cry. The wound in her heart can still be covered with the side of happiness that is in her life.
Zulfa's eyes followed Farel's finger. The man pointed to the trash can specially made for wet food, such as leftovers that Farel had not eaten. Getting used to it, the man easily throws away the food that even there are still many out there in need.
Zulfa believes, however, that she hasn't done her best in cooking either. Naturally, Farel doesn't like it because it's the first time she's cooked this kind of food. Maybe the level of doneness of the meat according to the man's taste was different from her cooking, she didn't understand.
Zulfa just followed the recipe on social media and then experimented on her own without anyone else's intervention. Hoping to get a satisfactory response, on the contrary, she again received negative comments.
"Sorry, my cooking doesn't taste good," Zulfa whispered while lowering her head slightly. Whether she failed as a wife because she couldn't cook her husband's favorite food, or Farel failed to appreciate all her efforts, she desperately did things she'd never done before just for a husband who always refused her presence.
Farel nodded his head, he immediately sighed. "When you wake up, you don't have to cook anymore. Waste of money," he said curtly. He had said many times that Zulfa's cooking was not to his liking, but unfortunately, she was so unpredictable!
"But that's my job, Farel!" Zulfa exclaimed in a voice that started to tremble. Let alone crying, just shouting a few sentences to Farel made her sadness even more peaked. But if she is not reprimanded, the wound in her heart will hurt more than this.
"What other obligations? You forgot that our marriage was only forced without my consent?!" Farel who may also never be able to relax with the topic of conversation regarding their marriage finally became emotional. Somehow, that high note came out of his mouth in a manly baritone.
Zulfa sighed, she was patient. Don't cry, don't cry. She braced herself and looked into Farel's eyes that were so intimidating. "I will always be your wife, no matter what." She said with a smile. Making peace with the situation is what he likes the most, she is very grateful because the pain always leads her to stay patient and get back up.
"I don't want you," said Farel with a cold tone that pierced Zulfa's heart.
Unwanted by husband? What kind of disaster must be stopped for being too cruel in Zulfa's life?
"But this is fate, Farel!" Zulfa answered with an exclamation that once again escaped her mouth. Does he have to be patient to feel strong in the face of all this? If you want to be angry with Farel, the man's emotions will subside a few minutes later, and after that, he will return to being gentle.
Zulfa's heart is made of solid steel?
"Destiny? My destiny is only with Rani. And you are a mistake in my life. So stop wishing." said Farel who was tired of the conversation that had been discussed since they had this marriage relationship. He just wanted happiness, not complicated matters like this.
Selfish? Of course, humans need to be selfish to reach the point of happiness according to their desires. If not, that's how suddenly arranged marriages are, even impromptu marriages. And unfortunately, once again, there should be no refusal to cancel.
Sick. That's how Zulfa feels right now. Farel had destroyed her hopes many times, but it did not make her waver. There are always a lot of patient and sorry words in her dictionary. Even this pain seemed to have become a habit. But of course, it hurts like this. Farel repeatedly said very hurtful things.
If Zulfa is a mistake, let it be corrected by her. This woman struggles to understand Farel's every wish from A-Z onwards, is that still the reason for men to reject Zulfa with her label as a mistake?
"Rani is not a good girl, Farel," Zulfa whispered. She didn't mean to insult or mock Rani, but which girl would dress openly and obediently if invited to a club? Not to mention if the girl takes her place as Farel's wife, will Rani be able to stay at home without any desire to travel there?
Farel looked at Zulfa with a cynical look, which of course pierced the girl's heart. "Then? You think you're the best here?" he asked with a sharper expression than before. In addition to the sensitive topic of marriage, bringing up Rani's name in their problems is also the most annoying conversation to hear.
"That's not what I mean, Farel. I'm not saying that I'm better than Rani." Zulfa said while shaking her head as if telling Farel that the man misunderstood what came out of her mouth.
Farel squeaked. "You sleep in the guest room for the night, I'm sick of seeing your face," he said he made up his mind.
With a forced smile, Zulfa took the dirty plates and glasses on the desk, then looked at Farel's face before leaving the room. What else could she want but surrender and accept everything Farel had ordered her to do? Once again Zulfa always applies not to refute every word of her husband.
"You need to know, a good girl will never let her lover get drunk. Moreover, the girl showed her body shape to others, for free. Is that girl good enough for you? Please think about your words, Farel. I'm just warning," she said in that long sentence, indicating that her mature nature was always present guiding her emotions to stay muffled even though it was difficult.
After successfully speaking like that, Zulfa turned to the right with tears running down her cheeks. She quickly walked out of the room and closed the door again. She cried silently as she felt the tightness in her chest cavity.
She is not a strong girl.
No, no. Her body may be strong, but her heart is very fragile. Is that the definition of a woman?
While still in his room, Farel pondered all Zulfa's words that he thought were true. Ah but he still loves Rani and no matter what happens, he will still love her. He positioned himself in the comfort of the bed, then closed his eyes.
Hope, his dreams are beautiful, more beautiful than his love story which suddenly turns complicated. He just wanted a break, from the storyline that pulled him slowly into the black hole.
...
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