***Helena's thoughts***
"You have to tell him everything, Helena. There is no perfect timing, if that is what you are waiting for. If you are waiting for the time that you will be ready, that will never come."
I think mom is right. I don't know when to tell Ed. I know he deserves to know everything that happened between me since he has professed about his feelings for me a number of times already. I took a deep breath, as if by doing that I will gain courage to the difficult task that I am about to do.
I went to where they were. I know my dad's favorite place and it would just take me thirty minutes on foot to get there. This place is just magnificent. The house that we live in is not grand but the entire property is huge. It is bounded by a river in the east and dense forest on the west. This is the kind of place that I would want to own in the future.
I saw the four of them from afar. It looks like my unease was all for naught. They were perfectly fine spending time with each other. I thought dad or Reagan was going to do something to Ed. I guess I was wrong. Both Ed and Jeff looked like they also like fishing judging by how relax their postures are. I can' see their faces since they had their backs on me.
Ed looks so hot. He was wearing one of dad's clothes since Reagan's is too tight. He and dad have similar physique, while Jeff and Reagan shared the same body shape. Ed was just wearing a worn out shirt and pants. No matter what Ed wears, he just looks good in it. You just can't fake it if you were born with good looks.
"I guess you passed" I heard Jeff said.
"I guess I did" came Ed's response and I saw him snicker.
This made me really curious. What were they talking about?
"Passed what?" I asked without any warning, directly sitting on the grass beside Ed's lounge chair. The all looked at me in surprise.
"You just can't stay away from fishing can't you?" dad said teasingly. I was always with them when they went fishing except for those afternoon that I would spend with mom. Fishing may be boring for others but for me it is quite peaceful and relaxing.
"Sit here." came Ed's curt command while looking down on me. He was scowling at me because I was sitting on the grass. When I did not move, he picked me up without any warning and drop me on the chair, he then plopped on the grass and resumed his wait for the fish to take the bait.
"Nope. I'm your daughter through and through." I said smugly. My hands were itching to touch Ed's hair. It was so close to me that I just have to reach out and my hands would be enjoying their softness. I had to shake myself out of those thoughts.
"Have you caught anything?" I asked.
Reagan just showed me a bucket that is almost full of trout.
"Just a couple more, I think and were done for today. Don't want to scare them into thinking that we are here to catch 'em all." dad said.
"We'll just have to asked mom to cook it, or maybe bake it?" Reagan said.
"Bake. With asparagus as sides." I added and we just looked at each other with dreamy eyes. Both already anticipating the delicious dinner.
I heard a sigh from Jeff. I looked at him and asked him what the problem is with my eyes. He just kept quiet.
"Hey, what's wrong Jeff?" I asked loudly.
I heard Ed and Reagan snort while dad just smiled at him kindly.
"He hasn't caught any." came Reagan's snide response.
"Is this the first time that you fished?" I asked in a hushed tone so that Reagan will not have additional reason to tease him. He just nodded.
I felt pity stirring in me just looking at Jeff's forlorn face. Awww, he really wanted to catch some fish.
"Don't worry, I also can't catch one. Of all the times that I went with dad fishing, I was only able to catch two." I told him my secret in a hushed tone hoping Ed won't hear me. "I always lost my bet with Reagan as to who will catch the most fish. I would always come home in tears. And he would not stop teasing me about it. Even told some of his friends that I was a loser when it came to fishing."
Wishful thinking. That is what it was, him not hearing what I told Jeff. I can just tell by the way his shoulders moved in silent laughter that he heard everything.
"Because you were a loser. If we placed a bet today, I am sure that I will still win. You will still not be able to catch a single trout no matter how long you wait here." came Reagan's mockery.
"Jerk." I said under my breath and he just laughed which was joined in by the rest of the gang. "Wow! Are you teaming up against me?" I challenged.
"If we were, are you going home crying and telling on us?" Reagan asked.
I wasn't able to respond since Jeff caught my attention when he suddenly stood up excitedly. His pole was moving and he was trying his best to reel the fish in. I cheered him on. I was so happy for him that he was able to catch one before we leave. It would give him a pleasant memory that he could take with him wherever he goes. While Jeff was busy reeling in his catch, Ed also caught another one, his fourth from what I heard. The man is a great fisher. What else can he do?
When everything was settled, dad and Reagan started packing up. We helped them pack and cleaned up the place. It was dad's rule when we fish or anywhere in the property. He doesn't want us to leave trash behind. It would damage the beauty of the place, which I totally agree with.
"I need to talk to Ed so you guys go on ahead. Mom knows that we will be coming in late." I announced. Only Ed was taken by surprise, dad, Reagan and Jeff just all treated my request as if it was just normally for us to be left behind and talk.
I sat on the grass again when they left.
"You better sit down because this will take a while." I said. Surprised at how calm my voice sounded when my heart was pounding like I ran a marathon.
This is it! No turning back now. I just hope that he can accept me and my past.