I took a step back. Woah, woah! Are they crazy? Or were they even thinking? Why would they think that we'd make a deal with them?
Okay, damn. Why am I fucking thinking like a businessman here? But everything's actually making sense now.
"Are you out of your mind?" I asked, and for the second time, Damian shushed me again.
He tried to get near me but I stopped him. "Relax, I'm just gonna hand you this." He meant the ring in his hand. I accepted it.
"How can we be so sure that this is fake?"
"Because I'm handing it to you. You won't even be here if that's the real one." He went back to standing beside Ashton. "So what do you say?"
I eyed my brother. I have no idea how to respond to the offer they just put on the table.
"Really, there's not much to think about," Ashton tried to push.
My eyes got filled with resentment. "Yes, there is. We would never have the assurance of you not betraying us. We never know if we wake up one day and find out that all of this is just a fucking malarkey."
I saw Ashton let out a sigh knowing that I was pertaining to him. It was a sigh of both frustration and agony. He knows. He knows what he did and now he's trying to make up by offering us alliance? No. He couldn't just wait to earn my trust before breaking it? Stupid.
"I know that this has come to a surprise. For most of us." I got baffled. For most of them?
"This was not in the plan, Brinley. It just so happens that we want the same thing and had the same people taking it away from us," Ashton tried defending his actions. I buy it. It makes perfect sense. Even the act of betrayal.
He knew I-- my family-- was interested in that ring. From that moment I put a bid in it. He did not escort or follow me for the sake of his clever and trying hard act to make me go out with him. He chased me because of that ring. Because of business. Not me.
If he can do this, what more can he do? Maybe all of what happened was just a scheme.
"I was in a place where I was not sure who you were. Now, I'm at a place where I don't even know who you are anymore. Clueless as it could be," I said in all honesty, without break, without pause. He did not answer back. He couldn't. I was spitting facts and he couldn't deny it.
I did not surrender myself to the emotions I was currently feeling. I stayed on my feet, hands in free motion. Not clenching nor trembling.
They started to untie my brother. He did not resist nor make a move.
"Our bad when you thought we were abducting you. We just didn't want any unnecessary commotion to take place. We just wanted to talk and for the both of you to be all ears," Damian said trying to make amends.
I don't know if he really thinks that this went well.
"And Mr. McNeil, we are hoping that you consider what we talked about. For further discussions, we can meet. Of course, not like this." He ended his statement with a chuckle, trying to put emphasis on his joke.
My brother tidied up as he stood up. He shook hands with Damian. Ashton held his hand too but my brother refused. "Not after how you made my sister feel," he said and walked past Ashton.
I followed Clinton as he made his way out of the room, passing through all the hallways I just went through a while ago.
Some of dela Cuesta's men escorted us out of the hideout. As we were walking, a thought came into my mind-- Is this how business works? They tie up my brother and after some explanation, there are no hard feelings? Or is my brother up to something? Or maybe it's just how he deals with things.
Why am I even overthinking this?
I just kept my pace with my brother until we reached a car, which I do not recognize.
"Mr. dela Cuesta ordered to bring you home safely," one of the men said.
Well, they better.
My brother opened the door for me and then he followed. We sat beside each other. I am not even gonna try to push my questions on him. I'm just drained out. I don't care. I just want to rest. I shouldn't have agreed to come with my brother, but in all honesty, I kind of liked the adrenaline rushing through my veins the whole time, but not the business occurring.
"Are you okay?" He asked in an attempt to pry about what I am feeling at the moment.
I just closed my eyes, denying him the conversation he was asking for.
As I tried to drift myself off to sleep, I just couldn't. I did not open my eyes either. Instead of falling into a deep sleep, I fell deep into my thoughts.
I started going backward. From a long time ago. From the way I gave in to the way I surrendered into the arms of a man who was not willing to hold me tight. We were young but damn, we almost had it all. But I guess, it takes real courage to deserve the love that you have always been asking for and dreaming about. All that you're expecting is nothing against what's coming. In life, you don't get to ask then receive. Most of the time, you ask and be left there, not knowing when to get back the love you gave wholeheartedly. You lose it all but then, you never know if you're ever going to have it all back again. Or even just some of it.
You wake up and pray to the gods to make the pain stop so you could snap out of it and start to
pick your pieces up again.
But what you did not know was that putting yourself back together again was more difficult than just snapping out of it, because you are aware but it seems like the world would not let you use the knowledge you already have. It makes you dumb. It makes you not make use of things you already know and have.
I guess, after all, I still dwell on the past. Especially on the things that I couldn't do anything about but question why and how do I get out of this hell of a place. It still haunts me every day. Much more than I could and would admit.
What he did seemed to be out of nowhere, but it was the plan all along. It just took him longer to actually get to me. To actually put the plan into action.
He fell for me, and that made him hesitate. But it didn't matter because he went through with it. He fooled not only me but the whole organization.
"I'm sorry." His eyes backed up his statement. I could see how I respond would matter so much to him. "I have to."
No, you don't.
I stood there watching him beg for my understanding, but all I could do was enrage in regrets.
"I don't know why I ever trusted you."
He closed his eyes for a moment. "I love you. You have to believe me on this one. Among all things, this one's the realest."
"Stop talking and just go." He tried to hold my hands but I moved it away. "You want the truth?" I said as tears rolled down my cheeks. The tears that I have been holding in for so long now. "I was the only one that was real."
After him trying to say sorry to me before getting on with his plan, I went away for a while. He proceeded to destroy the connection between our families.
It was devastating because he did not only break my trust, but also everyone on my side.
That event shattered me, and so I told myself never to trust people who don't deserve it. And I will know who deserves it, and for now, it definitely is not Ashton.
'That bastard', I thought.
Why does it seem like everything just circles around back to him?
Ah, I know.
Because how dare he try to get my trust and break it too soon? What he did was nostalgic and that made me angrier. It affected me in ways that I did not expect. That it actually still hurts.
"Brinley," my brother called, and it's when I realized that he's been calling me multiple times now. That I paced out but not with my eyes closed. I must've opened my eyes in the middle of my musings. Damn, I'm not even sure.
I ignored what my brother has to say. He just sighed and stopped prodding me.
As he stepped outside, we realized that we were only two blocks from the subway. I don't if we were taking it or he's getting us fetched up from here, either way, I'm good. I just don't want to talk.
Minutes of waiting and my brother started asking me if what's wrong. You know what's wrong, I thought.
"Brinley, talk to me." I crossed my arms, sending the signal that I don't want to. "You have to tell me what's going on," he said, trying the act of consolation. I cleared my throat which made him think that I'd answer him, but I did not let a single word out of my mouth. "Brinley, I know you didn't want to get involved. You did not have a choice because it was non-negotiable for you to come with me--"
"You think?" I interrupted. "Don't worry, I had fun. If it were not for the business there, it would have been great," I said in the most not condescending way I could possibly say it in.
There was a momentum of rushing thoughts in him, I can feel it. He's thinking about something. Concluding.
"You're affected," he blabbed out. Internal sweat started to stream down my forehead, if that's even a thing, but I tried to act ordinary. Unaffected.
"Of course, I am! You totally know how I feel about--"
"Not about the business," he said as he felt that he has it all figured out. My face turned all confused. The total opposite of what I was thinking. Of course, I know what he meant. Who he meant. "You're upset because you think that dela Cuesta double-crossed you. You think you were totally screwing him, but he got you." I knew what he meant but I was still caught off-guard. If there's one person I couldn't do a big lying to, it's Clinton.
"He did not get me." Just going there. I got surprised by what I just thought. It is just now when I realized how I really felt about this whole hooking up with Ashton thing. No, I don't trust him, not yet, not now. But I was totally charmed by him. He played his cards pretty well, but what got him to fold was that I was not all-in. He's giving in, I know it.
Clinton did not break eye contact with me. He put his arms around me and said, "Just be careful, okay?" I just nodded. "If anything goes wrong, you know I got you. Always." How could an impassive businessman be this affectionate? I took a deep breath. I am grateful to have someone who's there and will always be there for me.
"I'm sorry," I said as I felt guilty about how I acted out a while ago. He hugged his arm tighter around me.
I rested my head on his shoulder and after a while, a car stopped in front of us. The chauffeur.
Finally. I am so ready to go home.
Ashton Vans' POV
I was left there, stunned. I could not say anything as she was accusing me of a lot of things. Which is just partially true! I did not betray her. At least not that bad. She does not have to get that butthurt, but what cripples inside of me is that I actually understand her. I don't know but I have this feeling that she is being so reasonable about how she responded, that of course, I did not expect. It was evident in her eyes how pissed she is, and to be honest, I found it spine-chilling... and hot.
Damn, that girl.
I shook my head, not because of disapproval, but because I just had to keep myself composed.
"Hey, don't worry about it. That anger won't last," Damian from my side said pertaining to what just happened between me and Brinley. "You'll still get her. You wouldn't want to lose a bet, would you?" I laughed. Maybe, yes. I'll get her. I'm coming for her.
I made space between us and Damian and told him that I should get going. He let me go so I proceeded to go into my car. As I started the engine, I halted at the thought of her. Just for a moment, and then I let the thought go.
And so that I thought.
What am I doing obsessing over her? Just obsessing over her. I want her, and aside from all of this, I need her. She keeps me back on my feet. She keeps me steady. She actually kept me going.
Because of her, I started believing that things can be meaningful. That I can be meaningful.
*Flashback*
"Do you know why I wanted us to go here?" She asked as we sat on the ground. "Like together."
I hummed. "Actually, no." I tilted my head trying to decipher her thoughts by looking at her. "Why?"
"Well, it's nothing much of an explanation but it just clicked. I had a thought to bring you here and everything in me just agreed." She murmured a laugh. "Some things do not have to have reasons in order to be meaningful. Sometimes being there is explanation enough. Having your presence just says a lot."
I grinned cockily. "My presence?"
She shook her head in amusement. "I'm talking generally." She took my hand. "Tell you what, I say a lot of things, but I mean everything."
I breathed the sensation of what was coming. I have no idea what it is but I have the little sense that it'll be huge. That it will somehow put back some pieces into the puzzle.
"But this, I don't mean: It sucks hanging out with you."
*End of Flashback*
To think that that conversation happened on that overview mountain feels amazing. As I was trying to figure it out, I realized that she let me in in one of her sanctuaries. She was starting to give and tell me something. At least something.
It was something.
What am I doing?
I rushed on accelerating on the road as I picked up my phone and called someone. One of our men who I ordered to drop Brinley and Clinton to safety. I asked for the drop info.
I drove as fast as I can in hopes that I can catch up to her since I do not have her address, and did not get when I had the power to.
Fuck. How could I mess this up? How could I break her trust when I haven't even earned it in the first place? Stupid.
As I reached the coordinates I had on my hand, I immediately found her and his brother stepping foot inside a car. Probably on their way home, so I did not let myself in the open and followed them.
I stopped my car a few meters away from where they got off and called for Brinley. I got both of hers and his brother's attention. His brother eyed him, both in worry and distrust. That I can read from his eyes. It was so visible even I know it myself. Clinton had him and so she ignored me. Not even a look back.
"Brinley, just a minute!" I shouted in despair. "I really really need to talk to you."
Clinton sighed, exasperated. He said something which I read is that "Talk to him so you could shut him up." I chortled inside my head.
Clinton started to make his long way inside their house. Brinley started walking towards me. As she was only a meter away from me, I did not waste any more time.
"I fucked up and I know, but I just had to do what I had to at that moment. It wasn't like I planned it way before we met. It's just that it was the best option we had at the time."
She remained standing there, not enabling me to see right through her. " What? To have our hands tied? Oh, yes. It's just business. I understand. I do." Though one thing I can say, I am sensing the sarcasm in that statement.
"It's nothing personal because if it was, I wouldn't have done it to you. I meant what I said, Brinley. I want to go out with you and I am not just messing around. Loosely translated to: I want you." As I was saying those, I saw how pretty her eyes became. I felt hope filling the man that I am.
I know she understands. She does now, but she's having a hard time accepting it. With this girl, it sure does takes a lot of your time to know what she's actually thinking and feeling. She's not easy to read but she acknowledges her emotions, more than anything else, to herself, and that makes her out of the ordinary.
"It's difficult for you to trust but if you just--" I couldn't continue as she did not give me the chance. She advanced, held my cheeks and the next thing is that I felt her lips on mine. Softer than before. Fiercer than it could ever be.
After a while, she took a step back.
"Don't you ever lecture me about trust," she said and I know, that she meant.
But I couldn't care less. What just happened is gonna be the highlight of my day.
Or so I thought.
Moments between us, I heard engines revving coming for us. I think I saw approximately three vehicles before I grabbed her arm as I was sure that I smelled danger coming from those cars. She smelled the same scent too. The vehicles stopped as we were about to run away, but it was too late as I felt my eyesight circling. I couldn't focus. If I was looking at a target, I would've been seeing three bullseyes. My muscles loosened. My grip on her arms slipped away even though I refused to let go. Before I know it, darkness enveloped my surroundings and I couldn't do anything but succumb to the depth of nothingness.