Morning came and I feel so down. When I woke up, my mind flashes the memories of what I saw last night.
I ignored that thoughts but it's hunting me, but whatever, I already manage my skill to pretend that it was nothing.
I already have my food on the table but I'll take that after I take a shower. Cold water touched my body, I closed my eyes let my body calm from the touch of the flowing water.
I said, I manage to pretend that it was fine and not bothering me but if you would know what's inside of my head...it will literally blow you up.
I opened my eyes, it's really hard not to shut your mind from those thoughts. I finished what am I doing because it will trigger my emotions more.
White t-shirt and a biker shorts suits my taste for now. I seated on the table and started to eat when I heard a chopper.
I looked at the big glass window. I saw a red chopper. I shook my head in disbelief seeing Noah and Kamden.
They swinged from a ladder coming from the chopper and landed peacefully on the balcony of my room.
They entered after they saluted on the guy who's piloting the chopper.
"Why do you need a chopper?" I asked them. Kamden went to the door while Noah seated in front of me.
"To get in here." Noah took off his jacket and throw it on the sofa. This is the first time that I saw him wearing a fitted black shirt that really flexed his biceps and muscular chest. He's wearing a gray trousers that really suits him but different on my eye. Well, I always saw him wearing tuxedo.
"Why? There's an entrance." I affirmed.
Kamden placed a lot of paper bag on the table that really covered my eyes, not being able to see Noah.
Kamden scoffed and peeked through the paper bags. He looks like a cockroach coming from somewhere.
"Really? After you called your securities to drag us out you will ask that?"
"Why? What happened?"
Noah frowned. "They really blocked us when we attempted to enter. It's your fault." he put the blame on me.
"If I didn't call the security, you're going to tease me every single second!" I affirmed. "Besides, if I didn't call the security. You're fired from your works." I flipped my hair.
Kamden grab a chicken wings. "Yeah, she's right. Let's just eat."
"Where's the burger?" Noah asked.
Good thing they didn't blame me anymore and cause a loud noises from pointing at me just because they're not allowed to enter this hospital.
"Eat more brat, you're getting skinny." Noah pushed the bucket of fried chicken towards me.
"I'm getting fat, Noah." I said.
I want to have a good body, not too skinny and not to fat. I need to maintain a good body because I noticed that insecurities is hitting me after I realized the rejected feelings of mine towards him...maybe he likes sexy woman, with almost perfect small face, big but sexy eyes, pointed nose and plumpy lips. I just described Nurse Kim, and yes... I'm insecure about her.
Kaios saw her before he became blind and for sure...he likes her and his feelings came back because he saw her before and he knows every inch of her and of course, sure he fall in love with her for the second time because Nurse Kim is always taking care of her.
Me? For sure, Kaios didn't think of liking because I'm just a kid on his mind who likes to bother him and be friends with him. I'm sure that liking me in a romantic way never crosses his mind because he never saw me...even just before.
"This is the first time that you said you're getting fat." Noah said. I looked at him and nodded. "It's unusual. You're not fat, Reina."
"I am!" I affirmed and pushed my plate away from me, I didn't even finished my food. I cupped my cheeks and squished it. "See this cheeks? I look like a pig! It's a pig cheeks... it's squishy that means, I'm really fat."
Kamden removed my hand from my cheeks. He pinched my cheeks like I'm a sort kind of soft marshmallow.
"You're squishy." He nodded.
"See?!" I exclaimed that made both of them startled.
"But you're not fat. You just think that you're fat but you're not." he explained immideatly.
"Then what I am?!" I affirmed and pouted.
"A lady?" he said.
I frowned.
"I'm fat... I'm too fat... I'm ugly... I'm too ugly." I said while playing my food.
Noah pulled the plate away from me that made me looked at him.
Both of his elbow is on the table with his chin resting on his hand while staring at me attentively.
"Is there something bothering you?" he asked. Kamden is busy eating while playing on his phone.
I shook my head even though I am really bothered! I'm bothered of this fucking insecurities of mine that no one will going to love me because I'm getting fat and ugly...oh wait, he is 'no one'... I'm just pertaining to him and it scares the hell of me thinking about what I said months ago that I only like him as a friend.
Noah just stared at me.
I stared back at him with a thin lipped smile.
He said and shook his head before he continue his meal knowing that no matter he questioned me my mouth wouldn't speak to expose what I truly feel.
The three of us are getting bored. After we had our meal, we just played this freaking claw machine and now, we're laying on each other's places while staring into space. We're not even talking to each other.
I took a deep breath and took a glance on the IV on my hand until I spaced out and doze on my own world.
I never expected that insecurities have that worst effect on me. Suddenly I'm happy when I'm always with him but when I think that I'm just the one who is happy every time we're together and he's only happy when he's with Nurse Kim literally hunts me like...how am I supposed to make him happy when there's someone who's doing that already?
I just think that...When we're together, is he always thinking of Nurse Kim? Assuming that I was her so that he can be attentive and interested every time I'm talking?
I just thought that... I'm the one who's always finding a way to see his smile but when it comes to Nurse Kim it came out naturally even though she's not doing anything?
Yes, I became insecure of Nurse Kim. Maybe it's natural that I can feel insecurities because she's beautiful, she's smart, kind (to him), and she's his ex, she knows him a lot and he knows her a lot too, while me? I'm just nothing... I'm just a girl he knows and called a 'kiddo' because I always bother him and nothing anymore...and for me, I guess it's really natural to feel this since I fall for him.
Maybe, I need to distance myself from coming to his room to prevent myself from a heart break even though I don't really know what kind of heart break I'll have.
"Promise rings are cute." Kamden spoke. I looked at them. They're already sitting with coffee on their hands.
"Go buy yourself and wear it and promise to yourself you will not be a dumbass flirty motherfucker." Noah replied and sipped on his blue cup with a craft of dragon.
Kamden raised a brow with his thumb and index holding the his cup in a fancy way.
"Go buy yourself too and promise yourself not to be stupid numb motherfucker who's a silent flirt." He fired back.
A smirk plastered on my lips. This is a good time to pay back all those tease they thrown on me.
"Ooh, flirt? so you two are flirting each other huh?" I wiggled my eyebrows.
Noah suddenly sipped on his cup and took a quick glance on me.
Kamden on the other hand twitched his lips and even rolled his eyes.
"Not really." he respond where I almost laugh. It's unexpected.
"So, you almost huh?" I asked and smirked.
Kamden sipped on his coffee and didn't talk.
I giggled.
"What a couple. You're cute when you're together." I said and both of them acted as if they're disgusted but I saw all the daggers coming from Noah's eyes to Kamden.
"You better be disgusted, brat." Kamden said.
Noah chuckled sarcastically.
My lips thinned not being able to speak when the door opened.
"Oh, let's go out."
Kamden picked all of his things and stood up. He went to Noah and dragged him.
"Sup." They greeted.
"Yah! Yah!" I'm about to stop them when the guy on the door just entered without even greeting the two after hearing them.
"Yah! Noah! Kamden!" I called annoyingly.
After everything we've been through they're going to leave me like this?
Well, I said I don't want to go to his room because I don't want to see him but he just appeared on the door looking like a goblin.
"We're off to work. We need to go." Noah just shut the door. This butler of mine didn't even took a glance on me. I want his help! I'm getting awkward that I didn't even know where it came from.
He entered while dragging his dextrose.
He manage to go here without help. He's fine being alone.
"Why are you here?" I asked him.
"Why are you questioning me?" he asked me back.
I sulked.
Kaios just walked naturally and went to my bed taking a comfortable place to lay down and spread his arms.
"It's already 7. It's your schedule for dinner." I said to him. He tilt his face where am I. "Probably, your Nurse is finding you to feed you again."
I didn't meant to be sarcastic but I just did with a matching rolling eyeballs.
"She's not there." he said.
My eyes automatically rolled again.
She's not there, then what? He will come to my room to ease his boredom because his love of his life is still not there? What am I? A kind of thing to ease some boredom?
"Why are you so quiet?" he asked.
"Nothi--"
The door opened all of the sudden. Nurse Kim appeared.
"Kai, I'm finding you everywhere and it turns out you're here again." she said.
"Shut the door properly before you leave." I said to him. When Nurse Kim is here, I can really feel how my palms are burning and I don't even know why am I feeling that thing..but I guess, I'm too annoyed with her.
"I'm staying here." Kaios spoke.
I took a glimpse on her and saw her expression changed to irritation.
"No you can't stay here. You're going back."
"No."
"Just go, I need to rest. I don't want anyone." I said to him.
He tilt his head on my direction. His eyebrows are even furrowed as if he's confused on how I act right now.
"Please." i said.
"Fine." he forfeited. "Let's go to the rooftop later." he whispered.
I didn't speak... It's tiring to see them.
Kaios stood up and went to Nurse Kim. I couldn't bare to see any more further and lay on my bed and cover myself with a blanket.
I sighed and forced myself to sleep.
I don't want to be with him if I'm hurting because of what I keep thinking about them.