More than a crush!

I goes by the name Lynette. Am a good person, cheerful and kind of shy or nerd but I guess that's what makes me Me. I have small cycle friends but that's okay too. WHY? because am not good in making friends because my first impression people had on me is not always comforting and am used to it. Currently am in an university persuing a degree but i am not hundred percent sure if that is what I like or am studying for the sake of studying. Who knows, what the future might actually hold for me. I want to have many friends as possible but the idea of licking their asses and pretend to be someone am not that's the hard part for me, I guess that's why am still here with the same type of friends over and over again. One of friends I have is Claire, the sex type with the softest voice which make people's heart skip a bit and turn their attention to her. while Me here am totally different from her. I guess that's okay. of course it's not. Who doesn't want attention once in a while especially from a crush? I don't know if this is a crush thing or a temporary thing of one or two weeks because I never had really crush until now, so guess it will pass too. will it though? I never told Claire about the guy yet and I don't even think I will, not now, maybe until I sort my feelings first. But, what if I keep this form her and then I see these two people talk? God.... am so doomed, am not good at opening up. I act tough but infact am not at all, bottling things inside is never good, oooh trust me on that. Claire snapped me out of my thoughts "hey, what are thinking so hard about?" I replied vaguely "oooh it's nothing". By the way, Claire said in a cheerful tone and it's never a good sign. I sighed as I waited to hear about new crush or "crushes". I didn't want to act wierd on her to crush her or something so I played a good friend role. She stated "No fucking way you can't believe who I just chatted with right now". I asked casually "who"? "it's Gabriel" she replied with a broad grin plastered in her face. And I just remained there, looking at her bewildered just like a fool i was at the moment.