Sitting and listening to the people talk behind your back, is unseemly. The ones present here are all unworthy of you wei. You were once praised by them, but now they're the same who demean you. Are the praises of a young man just mere words that these people use to satisfy their egos?
Don't your feelings, your heart, your soul mean anything to these men? Wasn't it your blood too that was shed the other day? So why are these people talking ill about you? Who are they? Why am I forced to hear them talk about you this way?
What you did that night, I know. Whether it was right or wrong, this heart is too biased and is in no position to judge you.
All I know is that, it hurts. After that night, I shut myself Wei. I dont remember anything after that night. I am merely existing. Can I come and visit you? I want to. Could I stay with you? Will you allow me?
That thought makes me raise my eyes towards my brother who looks as disturbed as I feel. Could I leave my brother behind? No l can't, can I? He's there because of me. If not for me, I am sure my brother would have truly left everything behind and roamed the realm like a nomad.
So here I am, choosing him over you. Will you be alright, Wei?
They say I, the great Hanguang-Jun is a person who is away from the worldly affairs. But all my affairs start and end with you. If you're not here, nothing else matters. Love.
Should I even care what they speak? For I know it's all unwarranted. Would anyone care if I leave? If not for the promise made to my uncle, I wouldn't even be here. I'd be with WuJi or I would be back at Library Pavilion writing, researching and creating new scores to calm your mind. Wei, I wish I could be like you, not caring the least to what people think.
This banquet makes no sense. When they're gathered here to speak ill about you, it's best for me not to listen to their sadistic thoughts.
But then, my heart wants, what it wants and I hear someone speak up for you.
My eyes seek the speaker.
Mian Mian.
"Young Master Wei Wuxian, is not as bad as you think he is" she retaliates.
It's her. The one from Muaxi Mountain. She's the one for whom Wei has been scarred forever. She's on our side.
"He's a good man. He always helps the one in need. Not a man of jest words" he voice is bold yet respectful. See Wei, there are people who belive in you.
But unfortunately, her words are subdued by the frivolous people sitting here. They question her character as that is the best they can do. And she a fearless cultivator, removes the crest of the Lan Lingjin Sect and walks out with her head held high.
I need to talk to her.
The hall is filled with fury and chaos. Unable to believe that someone could be bold enough to take such a step. Not carring for the like minded inside, I step out to talk to her. Watching her about to descend the stairs, I call for her and she turns. Her eyes widen when they see me and I bow down with reverence.
"Lady Mian"
"Hanguang-Jun" the surprise in her voice is evident.
"Thank You" my voice is deep with gratitude and that's all I need to say. Understanding dawn's in her eyes and she smiles. She remembers our encounter back at the Muaxi Mountain and that I was being thankful for her support towards Wei.
"Hanguang-Jun, there is no need for you to thank me" she pauses "if I am here today, it is because of Young Master Wei, if not for him, I" she shakes her head from a memory that we both are aware about "I know Young Master Wei is fearless. We all know that. He stands by the weak and for justice. I just wish they would understand him just like us". My eyes seeks her's as I am surprised by the word 'us!
Knowing that someone else understands him, is quiet the solace I require. My Wei is not a bad man at all.
My salutation to her is filled with respect and her's is indeed with heavy respect too. We part ways and I wish her all the happiness that she deserves.
Turning away from her retreating back, my steps halt when I see my brother and Jin Guang Yao looking at me. Nodding I walk away. Unable to pretend that I care too much for these unwanted precedents, I mount my sword and fly away back to Jingshi.
"You're back" a soft voice greets me and I turn to see Lady Zhi Ruo walking by the Gusu garden towards me.
"Hm"
"I heard about Young Master Wei Wuxian" standing in front of me, her gaze pierces through mine and the daunting feelings are mirrored in her eyes "even if I ask you, are you alright? You're never going to give me an answer, so I won't bother asking, but I want you to know, we all care for you. Atleast some of us genuinely do". Sighing deeply, she stands beside me as the silence between us is a bliss. A little while later, I just tell her one thing that I needed someone to understand "He's not bad" and her reply is as simple as it could be "I know".
"How?" I ask, maybe I shouldn't have. I wasn't ready to hear her answer or maybe I was.
"It's quite simple, knowing you. If you trust him immensely, he wouldn't be a bad person" she turns to me and smiles and without another word she leaves.
No. He's not a bad person at all.
The next day, I am in the library pavillion, when brother enters with a knock "Wangji?" Watching me study the score in silence, he continues "Jiang Cheng has made a declaration. He has impeached Young Master Wei Wuxian from Jiang Sect. From now on, Jiang Sect will have nothing to do with Young Master Wei. The battle that ensued between them, Sect Leader Jiang Cheng has been injured".
"Wei?" Is the only name on my lips and I hear my brother's concern "We do not know" he shakes his head "the war is looming on all of us, Wangji" my brother cautions me.
"Why are you telling me all this?" I ask and the depth of sadness that reflects in his eyes pains me.
"Why are you telling me all this?" I ask and the depth of sadness that reflects in his eyes pains me.
"Cause between the war of the Clans, I am afraid, if anyone is going to suffer the most, that would be you, Wangji" with that he leaves and my heart is ripped into pieces cause I know he speaks the truth and only the truth.
Irony is, that every single word of his is have been engraved into my heart. Cause when the time comes, I won't be scarred. I would be burnt.
That night, sleep eludes me. I don't dream. I have a nightmare.
A small child, with toothy smile and raven hair partly covering his child like face. Young me is in search of him and when I find him, I run to hug him. But as we embrace, instead of warmth it is replaced by a cold body in my arms. The raven hair all sprawled around and gone is that smile that stole my heart. In place of that smile, is bloodied lips, cuts and bruises. Scars beyond recognition and in place of that young face, is the face of my Wei. Lying in my arms. Listless. Calm. Cold. Blue.
And only one name I scream. Wei Ying!!! Come back!!!
Let me take a deep breath. I need one. Lan Zhan, are you alright?