We were both woken up the morning after by the maid, they had another dressing gown for Faina and a home remedy that helped against a hangover, no one knew exactly what was in it but no one asked either. I drank my morning cup of jasmine tea while my sister rubbed her head and choked down this concoction in one go. What did I say to you yesterday?" she asked. I thought about it but didn't find any of the topics she had mentioned yesterday appealing, so I lied: "You kept telling me about the horse you bought to make up for Bleuciel." The lie came from my lips as if it were easy, I was surprised. She smiled and then screwed up her face again: "Yes, that sounds like me when I'm drunk." I could tell she wanted to smile but couldn't quite manage it. I looked at myself in the mirror, the hickeys were still there. It was to be expected that they wouldn't go away. I pulled up the collar of my bathrobe, the last thing I needed was someone calling me on it again. I've already seen the spots, Dinora, you don't have to hide them from me," Faina confessed. Oh...", I groaned. Don't worry, Di, I won't tell anyone, I'll show you how to remove the make-up," she drank a sip of her tea. The remedy already seemed to help. Di, I don't care if you're not a virgin any more, you can tell me, I'm not a virgin any more either," she said so quickly that I didn't know what to say first. "So you're not... since when?" She took another sip and then smiled so mysteriously: "It's been about two months. Bleuciel and I just couldn't wait any longer, and since we would both go to the ends of the earth for each other, it has been unnecessary to wait until the wedding night. All this virginity, it's so overrated anyway." I just kept quiet, it's a private subject for me, I might be more uptight than Fi. As nice as it was to talk to her as intimately as I rarely do, so many things I was just making out with myself came up. "Did it actually hurt?", I dared to ask. To be honest with you, yes, but that doesn't necessarily mean anything, it can't hurt you either, it's different for every woman," she answered me honestly. I put my cup down and nodded. With that I wanted to close my Pandora's box again. When is your wedding actually going to take place? I think sometime in May, but we would prefer not to celebrate in France or England, and would prefer Italy. The Royal House of Ambra would be delighted." The Italian family was an alliance state with France, they were somehow intertwined, no further idea, I knew more about my country and France. The Italians are not exactly our friends, but we got along quite well. I still didn't like the children, they were all so self-centred and arrogant. And I didn't like the royal couple, who hadn't been on the throne for long - at first Italy was a democracy, which then reverted to a monarchy. I think I will go back to my beloved now, it was a nice time with you. We will meet again in the afternoon. There is a little tea party planned informally with the family, I suppose mother and father just want to know how you are doing now, and if you are in love yet or something. Be prepared for that," she kissed me on both cheeks. This was a habit she had picked up in France. Then she left my room.
Five minutes later there was a knock. Had she forgotten something? I yanked the door open with a flourish and my mood plummeted, it was Livius. I slammed the door shut again, to make it clear that I didn't want to see him. "Ouch," came from the other side, "Aren't you going to invite me in?" "No," I hissed. Silence. Come on Dinora, be nice to me, I've had a bad day and I didn't get my midnight dance you promised me. If you want me to fight for you, I want you to do something for me too!" That sunk in, now I'd had enough. I yanked the door open again, anger written all over my face: "Now listen to me, Livius, while I needed your help, you were having fun with Levina, you were flirting with her and what else. What am I supposed to think of that please, you love me that much huh?" I punched him in the stomach: "I was scared and you weren't there, you ignored me, that hurt me, you didn't even ask how I was afterwards or seek me out. I don't want anything more to do with you, it's over Livius." He played down his pain but it hit him, harder than I thought. He stroked my hair and paused. The hickeys, crap. His expression darkened and his eyes took on a deep blackness. He reached out with his hand and slapped my face, then shook out his hand. My eyes filled with tears and I grabbed the spot, it throbbed and burned. He had hit me seriously, now I see his true face. There was no expression on his face: "Bitch." I slammed the door behind me and ran outside to the balcony. The sun hit my face, burning my skin. I was at the parapet, for a moment I thought I could jump down, but, this I did not do. I clawed at the massive stone, I sobbed, held my hand over my mouth and sank to the ground in pain. I couldn't take it any more, now he had broken my heart completely, I had suppressed the pain it would cause me if he left me. Now I had seen his true face.