"At the request of the gossip ho community at Exeter Academy, I am to ask you the following questions…"
"Alright, shoot."
"Question one: what brand of cigarettes does Ms. Lohan smoke?"
A chuckle. "She loves an L&M red."
"Question two- and it absolutely pains me to ask this one- Fitzwilliam Darcy, why are you so sexy?"
"Genetics. Possibly some witchcraft."
"Last one- did you have any idea how utterly disappointing it would be for your loving, little sister- your only sister, to find out you've got a new girlfriend from Ryan Seacrest? I mean really, Fitzie. Seacrest?"
Smiling, Fitzwilliam shifted the phone from one ear to the other. "Since when do you watch E! News?"
"Don't avoid the question," was the teasing reply. "Not only were you on E! but the Ivy? I seem to remember you saying something to the effect of 'only if I'm hungry for attention'."
"Caroline suggested it."
"Oh, well that makes sense now."
That got a laugh.
"So, Mr. Darcy give me the scoop about this new lady of yours. She seemed super cute on TV but then again the paps only got the two of you from the side. What's her name? Where'd you meet? Is she opposed to highly curious and overprotective sisters?" Georgiana lowered her voice an octave, and asked without an ounce of seriousness, "She ever killed a man?"
From the moment she was born, Fitzwilliam was smitten with his baby sister. He remembered meeting Georgie for the first time quite clearly; gently coaxed into holding the wriggling pink thing his parents dubbed 'Georgiana', Fitzwilliam took one look at her scrunched up face and big brown eyes and knew right then and there he would protect her with his life.
Georgie took one look at Fitzwilliam and spat up.
From that day forward the pair were closer than close, an eleven year gap be damned, and despite polar opposite personalities. Georgiana was fearless and a bit quirky- as a toddler she was prone to leaping off of any high object at any given moment, and there was an extended faze where her bathing suit and rainboots were the only articles of clothing she would consent to wearing. She'd somehow managed to bypass the crippling Darcy social anxiety end of the genepool, and spent all of her time in utero soaking up the Darcy wit. Georgie was outgoing where Fitzwilliam was guarded and shy. She loved school (and black jellybeans) to an almost insane degree, and was thoroughly convinced she would end up a mad scientist or a concert pianist, or very possibly both.
Fitzwilliam could feel himself sinking low into his chair at the barrage of questions about Lizzie. He'd dreaded this moment the second the first flash bulb blinded him when they stepped out of the restaurant- the one where he would have to lie to his sister. The one person in the world he never lied to.
"Her name's Lizzie- we met through Charles…"
Georgie laughed. "Oh, so Lizzie's got a hot friend-"
"Hot sister." Fitzwilliam grinned. "He spilled Starbucks on her."
"Aww," Georgie said with a sigh. "Wait, wasn't that the plot of his last movie?"
"Love at first sight again."
"What about you?" she asked.
"What about me?"
"I mean, I will build a temple to worship the likeness of anyone you date not named 'Caroline', but you know- you and Lizzie? Is it serious? Is it first sight?"
It was an absolute hot mess and he was insane about her eyes. "I'm bringing her to your recital if that answers that question."
"It doesn't, but I'll take it."
**
The cover image for the week's issue of US was of a stone faced Fitzwilliam Darcy with an arm wrapped around Lizzie's waist ushering her towards a waiting car on the side entrance of the Ivy. Page nineteen of People was a whole host of angles of the two of them from that night (with pages twenty-one and two dedicated to Jane and Charlie), and the front page of Perez was taken up by Caroline- white MS Paint squiggles drawn on the see-through bits of her Stella top.
"You work here?"
Letting out a dejected sigh, Lizzie shifted uncomfortably on her feet and tried to regain her customer service smile. She was on hour two of an eight hour shift and this table was easily the twentieth to have a copy of that goddamn US Weekly.
Her 'good service' mask was rapidly slipping. "I do!" she chirped, slightly overdoing it. "Can I start you guys off with some appetizers today?"
"Spinach dip…"
"That's an excellent choice! I love the spinach dip here." She tried to reply friendly but it came out sounding as if she were being held at gunpoint.
"And you're dating the Darcy broadcasting guy?"
"...I thought he was with Lindsay Lohan…?"
"...what? he was never with LiLo…"
"He's a close friend," Lizzie said tightly. "Now we've got spinach dip, can I get you anything else? The wing sampler is amazing and is on special today…"
"...yes he was with LiLo! I just saw those pictures- he was lighting her cigarette!"
"Fuck, I'm so fucking tired of this fucking place and these fucking people." The laments were loud as Lizzie barged into the kitchen with her latest order (she'd sold that wing sampler but it came at the cost of her autograph on that magazine.)
Used to Lizzie's mouth (and in total silent agreement with her sentiments), the kitchen staff continued as normal, but Charlotte trying her best to appear professional, let out an uncomfortable laugh and gestured towards the young man at her side. "And there she is! Lizzie this is Danny, our new trainee. Danny, this is Lizzie- she'll show you the ropes and tell you how great it is to work here! Right, Lizzie?"
Flashing a smile at her that was so devilishly handsome it should have been criminal, Danny the trainee extended his hand. "Danny Wickham," he said. "Should I be afraid?"
Lizzie shook it. "If you don't read US Weekly then you've got absolutely nothing to fear." She smiled. "Welcome to Chili's."