Sometimes, an apology means a lot
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12
"Do we really have to celebrate here?"
I know it's already too late for me to say that as we are already in front of the club that Lea chose for us.
"Of course Alice!! We've sealed the deal with the Sia and Co. How can we not celebrate?"
Lea was so hyper the whole day. It was morning when she suddenly barged in our room, saying that the representative who we were supposed to have a meeting called her and announced that Miguel Sia had already signed the contract. There will be few amendments but we've sealed the deal.
She also said that tomorrow is our last day here in NYC. We just can't leave the city without celebrating.
"Let's go girls!" Clara said in her most excited tone and went inside the bar, not minding us. I've been here before and we actually frequent here as this is one of the high-end club in the city.
Lea had been here before when she had an internship in her college days. This certain club is a den for celebrities and wealthy people.
It's not really a shocking matter to me that Lea was able to arrange a reservation for us even though she called earlier today. She's a very influential person and yet a really humble one.
I must say that it has this Cavalier's vibe. However, it's much more spacious and elegant than Cavalier's. It doesn't really look like a club to me. It looks like a party place but you know, for elite people.
Lea told the receptionist her name and the woman guided us inside.
She showed us our table on the second floor. It's not crowded on this floor unlike the floor underneath us.
We have this huge L-shaped gray couch and a huge cream wall on both sides that serve as the divider from the tables beside us.
There were drinks and food already served on the table. The lady said we can ring them up using the button underneath the table, in case we have another set of orders.
"Girl this is so huge for us," Lea said while scanning the couch. If I'm not mistaken, I think it can fit at least five petite women on just one side of the couch. "I should've invited other people too," she said and sat at the middle part of the couch.
She was wearing this skin tight skin-colored dress paired with a nude pumps.
Chesca sat beside her and started opening the bottle of Perignon. She's wearing a red dress and paired it with a black heels.
Clara and I sat beside Lea. Clara was wearing a body con, it's a bit an eyesore as it's neon colored; take note it's neon green.
"You should've worn the black dress," I told her.
"I like this one." She said and proudly modeled the dress in front of us.
It's not really bad. I'm just not really a fan of colors that really pops out. Clara liked wearing neon colored clothes. I think she has other dresses that exactly look the same but in other neon colors.
Clara is tall and slim. She is almost the same build as I am, but taller. She has this hourglass shaped body. Which makes body con dresses suits her well. Not to mention that she's morena, that's why the neon dress that she's wearing, definitely looks good on her.
"You should've worn the black dress instead," Clara then said while eyeing the dress I'm wearing.
My brows furrowed, "Why? It looks good on me."
I can't help but to survey my own body. I'm wearing this purple tie dye long sleeves dress. It has wrinkles on the side part to have more detail on it.
"Yeah, it does." She said, as if I forced her to say that.
She wanted me to wear the black gutter dress that has fur on the hemline and neckline. It does look good but I feel like I'll get cold the whole night. So I opted for the tie dye dress. It's actually very short and fitted dress.
We really have things that we don't like about each other. Yet, it didn't really matter to us at the end of the day.
"Should we invite other people?" Lea suddenly spoke.
"Who are you going to invite then?" Chesca asked while already drinking.
"Miguel," I looked at her, in shock. Are they close?
"You mean Miguel Sia? The one we had a meeting with?" I said, almost sounding shocked.
She nodded which made me curious even more.
"Ohh! Go on! I'm actually close with Miguel," Clara said and giggled.
"That's not a fun giggle," I told her with my squinted eyes.
"It is. He's really fun to hang out with." She said and started laughing on her own.
Chesca and I, looked at each other with our eyes a bit narrowed. We're probably thinking the same thing.
"What kind of hang out?" Chesca suddenly intrigues her with a slight smirk on her lips.
Clara bit her lip, stopping herself from giggling more.
"We'll uh-- he was the one, uh-- I told you guys that I dated in London for two weeks."
I knew it. Clara knew a lot of people. She likes to travel alone. She sometimes invited me but I couldn't come with her for some reasons.
"Okay okay! I'll invite him!" Excited Lea and laugh.
She started typing on her phone. Clara and I started to drink too, following Chesca's ahead drinking.
"Let's take a groufie," Chesca said and took out her phone.
She extended her arm and started taking pictures with us. My phone beeped with a notification from Instagram, she tagged with her IG story and post.
She congratulated us with the IG post with her comment, Congratulations on your new business venture. Let's party na!
We just finished the bottle of Perignon when Miguel came. Lea went to him and welcomed him.
"Am I the only guy here?" He said and laughed.
"No! I actually invited his brother," Lea said and suddenly pointed at me.
"My brother is in the city?" My eyes widened and my mouth opened.
For goodness sake! I didn't know that.
Lea laughed at my reaction. Who wouldn't laugh anyway? I'm the sister and yet, I didn't know my own brother's whereabouts.
"Clara," Miguel said. Clara stood up and kissed his cheek. Miguel laughed when she did that.
"Oh by the way, Miguel this is Chesca and you already know Alice," Lea said.
Chesca extended her arm to accept Miguel's eyes.
"Are you a Chinese descent?" He asked.
"Yeah. I'm Chesca Sy," Miguel's eyes narrowed but the side of his lips rose.
As if their eyes were talking to each other.
"Aviel,"
I stopped thinking when I heard Lea. I turned around and saw my brother walking towards us. Lea welcomed him and my brother whispered something. Lea nodded and said something too.
"Hey," I stood up and went to my brother.
I kissed his cheek after I got in front of him. My eyes widened when I saw Ian behind him.
"You don't mind that I brought your blind date, right?" My brother whispered to me when I was about to pull away.
Fuck! How did my brother know about the date?
"Let's party!"
I couldn't respond as my brother already dragged me to our table, pulling my wrist.
He sat beside Clara and I sat beside him. Miguel sat beside Chesca while Lea was ordering another batch of bottles.
I felt awkward when Ian sat beside me.
"OMYGOSH! Did you invite Ian, Alice?" Chesca asked when she noticed Ian beside me.
"No, I was the one who invited him." My brother said and eyed me for a moment before he looked at Chesca and then to Lea. "I hope you don't mind," to which Lea shooks her head.
Ian took a glass and poured whiskey on it.
"How did the two of you know each other?" Clara asked.
Omy! I should thank Clara later for asking that. I've been questioning myself about that too.
"We have a business together," my brother announced.
I turned around and, "Was he the one you had a business meeting with?" I whispered.
He looked shocked when I suddenly asked him that. He must've not expected me to talk to him now that my brother is around.
"Yes," He simply said.
"Why didn't you tell me?" I sounded furious but more like betrayed.
"You didn't ask," he answered in a calm tone.
I scoffed when his answer sunk in. We've had time together and yet he didn't bother to mention it. I mean, I don't need to ask right? A simple sentence would be fine anyway.
"Are you mad?" He suddenly asked. I blinked twice before I calmed myself.
I think my expression looks like I'm mad.
"No." I said and maintained a straight face. I turned around and poured myself with vodka.
I just... I'm not mad. I mean, can't he just mention it without me asking?
Is it now allowed?
"Slow down," my brother said after he caught me pouring my fifth glass.
"I can handle myself," I said and poured another one in my glass. My brother looks confused with my sudden behavior.
I just can't help it! Why am I acting like this? Why does it infuriate me? Alice, it's not his obligation to tell you the things you didn't ask for.
But can't he just do it voluntarily?
I'm losing myself.
"Stop," my brother took the bottle of vodka from my hand. It's almost empty and I was the only one drinking it. "What the hell is your problem?"
His voice sounds stern yet insisting. That's when I notice his worried face.
"Is it because I brought him here?" My brother whispered to my ear.
"No," I admit.
"Then why the hell are you drinking a bottle of vodka alone?" He sounded really confused.
"I don't know. I can't even explain it to myself," I told him the truth.
The thing with my brother is that he knows me too well. He knows whenever I'm telling the truth and he knows when I'm lying. He almost knows everything about me but of course, he wouldn't understand my feelings even though he knows a lot about me.
That's what my brother told me. He may have tried to understand me but at the end of the day, he will never understand my feelings. He was not the one who was feeling it and hence, the only thing he could do is to stay beside me.
He told me that when Henri died. Come to think of it, my brother was never really a vocal person. He always showed his love for the people around him through actions but when Henri died, he started verbalizing his love for me as his sister.
Clara and him were always there from day one, since Henri died. I mean, they have always been there ever since but you know, they attended more to my needs.
My mind stopped thinking when I felt the cold bottle of vodka on my hand. My brother placed it there and didn't say a word.
It's not that I need his permission but I felt like he permitted me to drink until the very last drop.
I was about to pour the remaining on my glass when Ian suddenly stopped my hand from doing so.
I looked at him looking confused. "What!"
"Why are you drinking that much?" His tone sounded concern and yet curious. His eyes bore on me as I continued pouring the remaining on my glass.
"Because I have my brother here to get me home," I said. He looks more confused than he was.
"Can you stop drinking after that bottle?" His eyes were pierced to mine. I can see his emotions right through it.
Were his emotions genuine?
"Why?" He was about to speak but I chose to continue, "Why do you care Ian?"
I think he was taken aback when I asked him that. His side cheek bulged with his tongue pushing it. As if he was stopping himself from saying something.
"Oh wait, do you even care?"
It must be the vodka that was speaking for me. I could never ask him that straight without the influence of alcohol. I could never.
"Do you think I don't care about you?" He said while gritting his teeth. It was a whisper that was carefully said. Afraid that everyone would hear him.
I suddenly couldn't answer him. As if the alcohol left my body and I am all remained with my soul.
"I care about you Alice," His eyes were just straight into my soul, it's as if he was talking to my soul and not me. "because if I didn't, I wouldn't have asked you twice to remove that ring on your finger."
I eyed the ring on my finger. He's right, it's still there.
There's this guilt again inside my heart. I've never wanted to feel guilty towards Ian. I know he has been showing his feelings for me but I think it was too... fast for my phase.
Even though he keeps telling me that he's not rushing things with me, I just can't seem to follow him through.
I couldn't celebrate the whole night. I would sometimes laughed with them but I would end up clinging on to my own thoughts.
"Chug! Chug! Chug!"
Clara kept telling while my brother was chugging the bottle of bourbon whiskey. It's my brother's favorite drink. There's no way he could finish the whole bottle!
"Oh my gosh Clara! What are you doing to my brother?" I was so hysterical after my brother finished the bottle of bourbon.
"Girl! Your brother is so fucking competitive!" She said that as if that was the answer I was waiting for.
"You both need to stop!" I told them. I feel like I'm sober now and I should stop them from drinking.
"Oh! I've finished the bourbon! I should be your crush by this time," My brother said, teasing the hell out of Clara.
I can't help and hit him on the back. "Aw, what the hell--" he couldn't finish his sentence when he saw me raging. "It was Clara's idea,"
His face looks red and I can even see his neck and upper chest on fire as it his shirt is unbuttoned. His hair looks disheveled as if someone pulled his hair.
"You look so messed," I seriously said.
"Stop that Alice. I still need to chug this bottle," Clara.
My eyes widened when I saw the unopened bottle of brandy. What the hell!
"No!" It was too late. Clara was chugging the brandy and my brother looks so amused at Clara.
Lea and Chesca were recording the whole scene with their phone. Miguel was watching too. Uhm, Ian behind me is watching too.
"Can she finish that?" He suddenly whispered on my ear. I could feel his hot breath, linering in my ear down a bit to my neck.
I just nodded, afraid he would sense nervousness in my voice.
I watched my brother watching Clara chugging the bottle. In no time, Clara turns the bottle up-side-down in the air, showing it's already empty.
I face palmed when they congratulated each other.
I felt defeated watching my best friend and my brother laughing like crazy people.
I sighed heavily with the thought of my brother and best friend competing over alcohol. My shoulder dropped as I leaned back to rest.
I was startled when I felt a hard thing behind me, it wasn't the couch! It was Ian! I forgot that he was too close.
"OMYGOSH! I'm sorry," I immediately said and straightened my body but he stopped me from doing that when he placed his hand on my waist, pulling me back to him. He was almost hugging me from the back.
I stiffened when my back leaned on his hard chest.
"You can always lean on me,"he whispered in my ears. I felt a different sensation all over my body. As if I was electrified.
I couldn't move, especially when his chin rested on my shoulder blades.
"It feels nice to have you in my arms Alice," I really gulped when he mentioned my name. I turned my head a bit to see his face but I think that-- that was a huge mistake.
His face was so close as he was also looking at me as he rest his chin on my shoulder. I couldn't breath properly because with one unnecessary move I feel like our face would touch.
It was the first time I was able to look at his face up close.
His eyes have this shade of brown. It was mesmerizing that you'll be stunned when you had eye contact with him.
His lashes were long and his brows is perfectly thick. His nose isn't small but I couldn't say that it's nig, probably bigger than mine but it's pointy and straight. The way his lips twitch, shows the bit thickness of it, especially his lower lip.
"You look so beautiful amore," I blinked twice before I decided to straighten my body.
My heart was beating so fast. I'm afraid he would hear it and tease me around.
I tried to sit properly but his hand didn't left my waist even though his chin already left my shoulder blades. I tried to act cool and pour my glass some bourbon and drank it straight, to ease the dryness of my throat.
But despite my effort to calm and divert my attention, the nervousness still lingers in my chest as his hand is comfortably resting on my wait, not letting me go. I don't think he has plans on getting rid of his touches, so I don't think I can rest tonight without feeling nervous.
"Slow down, you have the whole night to drink." He whispered again. He must have noticed my phase getting faster.
I tried to slow down a bit.
He leaned forward and placed his right arm on his knee. He rested his chin on his hand and stared at me.
"Ian, don't melt my sister." my brother suddenly said.
I turned a bit to see Ian. His eyes were just on me, watching my every move.
"Let the lovebirds be. Chug this!" They started chugging again and again.
They are still sober despite chugging a whole bottle and I guess, by the time we finish, they would be all crawling back on their bed.
"Why don't you join us Ian? Chug too!" Clara said, provoking the competitiveness of Ian.
My brows furrowed. "Sure," my eyes immediately laid on Ian as he removes his hand on my waist and held the unopened bottle of bourbon.
I'm sure my brother ordered a lot of bourbon.
"Don't," I whispered.
I think he didn't hear me and open the bottle. He started chugging while Chesca and Lea started recording him as well. The others were cheering and counting!
My brother, Miguel, and Clara started shouting their random support words for Ian to finish the whole bottle of bourbon.
He stopped a bit when he got half-empty and continued again. He didn't stop until the last drop. He looks so proud turning the bottle up-side-down.
"Did I pass?" He said and laughed hard with them. Clara thumbs up and my brother just laughed. Ian laughed along the way too.
I stopped drinking to watch them. Lea also stopped drinking to baby sit the others.
Ian placed his hand again on my waist. He was just silently watching my brother playing rock-paper- scissors and the loser gets to drink tequila. Chesca and Miguel were also playing. Lea was the moderator.
Here I am again, feeling nervous. I just... let him do that to me.
"I wanna join," Ian suddenly said.
I turned around to see him. His cheeks were too red and his eyes looked sleepy.
"But you're drunk," I whispered, just enough for him to hear.
"I'm not," he said and pouted his lips.
He rested his chin on my shoulder. "Can I?"
Is he really asking me now that he has already joined the chugging contest? I didn't bother to stop him and just let him do whatever he wants. I don't want to give him a chance on knowing that I'm nervous around him.
"I wanna go home," he suddenly whispered again. That tickles my ear.
I looked at y writ watched and saw that it's already midnight. The party seems to be just starting as people weren't looking drunk.
I eyed Ian for a moment before I turned to Lea. "We'll go first," I simply said.
"Ha? You're leaving," she look shocked.
"What? Who's leaving? No." my brother said and looked at me.
"Let them leave. They must be drunk," Clara said and giggled. She even winked at me.
What the hell is she thinking?
I gathered my stuff carefully as Ian was still resting on my shoulder.
"Let's get you back to the hotel," I whispered. His eyes were already closed but he nodded. "Lea sorry. I'll leave them to you," I kissed her cheek before I turned to my brother. "Get Clara back to the hotel or else..."
He just nodded and kissed my cheek. "Chesca, Miguel, we'll go ahead." Chesca also kissed my cheek before I turned around to see the sleeping Ian.
"Hey," He opened his eyes and slowly stood up. "Let's go?" He asked. I just nodded and he started walking but on his third step, he stumbled.
I had to follow him quickly to catch him.
"Hold on to me," I said and wrapped his arms on my shoulder as I wrapped my arm on his waist to support him.
"I will.." he tilted his head on me and said, "I will hold on to you,"
I didn't know what he was saying but I flicked his forehead which made him laugh.
We went out of the club and went straight to the parking lot. "Where the hell is your car?"
He looks asleep. "Ian!"
He almost jump as he was startled with my sudden yell. "It's must be there somewhere. Let me get my key,"
He tried to look for his keys in his pocket but he was so sloppy.
I groaned as I felt frustrated. That stopped him from looking for his keys and looked at me. "Are you mad at me?" His lips pursed.
"No. Where's your key?"
He started looking again. But due to his drunkness, he couldn't even properly slid his hand inside his pocket. I sighed and went closer to him and remove his hand. I tried to carefully slid my hand inside his pocket to get his car keys. "Careful," he said and smirked. "You might touch something else," He said and chuckled.
He pouted his lips when he saw me not receiving his jokes as I glared at him. When I got the key, I immediately looked for his car.
We walked towards his car and tried to get him in "Get in,"
I was about to walk to the other side of the car when he stopped me, pulling me back to him. I even bumped my forehead on his chin. "I'm sorry," He suddenly said.
"What are you sorry for?" I asked. I just had to. I feel like he's not apologizing for something trivial. I can feel that there's something more in his apology.
"Was I too fast?" His eyes were half closed but they were still looking at me. He was gonna say something but he closed his mouth and entered the car. I was left dumbfounded.
He didn't even wait for my response. Was my facial expression answered his question?
I bit my lower lip and closed the door.
When I got inside the car, he was already asleep. I drove back to the hotel silently, not really bothering him.
When we got in the lobby of the hotel, I had to wake him up.
"We're already here," he just nodded and went out of the car. I followed him and gave his keys to the valet.
"Aren't you going to wait for me?" I said a little loud. He stopped and waited for me for a second.
When I got near him, he immediately turned around and walked again; not really waiting for me.
We went inside the elevator quietly. I don't know why, but there's this heavy atmosphere around us.
We were silent when we got inside his hotel room. But to be honest, my heart was loud and my mind keeps asking why I was there? Why did I even enter his room.
I was caught off guard when he turned around and asked, "Why are you still here?"
I was so confused the whole time. I didn't know what to say. I feel like I was in a maze where there were random doors to get out of it.
"Uhm-- I'll leave now," I stepped back feeling unsure.
Right? Why am I even here in his room? I shouldn't...
"Alice" he suddenly called. "I'm sorry," I was about to say something but opted to listen. "I'm sorry for bothering you a lot. Uh-- I guess you wouldn't have to worry about that anymore."
My brows furrowed. What? I don't really understand anything he just said.
I feel stupid as I try to look for the proper words to say. I don't know if it was the alcohol in my system or is it the alcohol in him but his gaze were different, very different.
His eyes... look tired.
"I won't bother you anymore." He said carefully. "You're free to go now,"
I was lost for words. I had a lot to say but I just couldn't.
I wanted to ask if he was for real. I wanted to ask if he meant it. But I didn't.
How could he just say that? Was I too slow or he just got tired of me? Did he lose hope because I'm still wearing the ring? What?
I wanted to say something but I don't think it would matter to him. He decided already.
I nodded and turned around
I left his hotel room without saying anything and I didn't look back. I just... I just didn't.