*
"What do you want?" I prodded for information. I wasn't exactly in a good place, my agitation showing itself on my face and welling up into frustration. I grip my fists tighter, holding them by my side.
"Seeing as you haven't been erased, maybe you can save us. Kaori, our name is Xelem. Could you kill the original? " (Xelem)
Everything I felt in the past few hours faded away as if some kind of drain was sucking my emotions out. All my experiences, all my pain. An odd warmth enveloped my heart, a sinister and dark one.
"Why...? "
Even if you were my enemy, it should be normal to still feel perplexed if you just outright asked me to kill you right? It made no sense whatsoever, any living thing would have a sense of self preservation... Surely, you too...
"... You... Are exceedingly soft. What the hell, even pity has its limits, really doesn't inspire confidence that you can kill the original.
Even so, I'm flattered you would empathise with us. Us who were created to be disposed. You know, like how living beings were created to instinctually reproduce? We were created to die, it's something we've come to accept. But even so we have intelligence, a secret record we keep hidden even from our creator. "(Xelem)
" In the first place, how do I even get out of this place? I can't help you if I don't escape. "
A soft smile welled up on her face, her knowing eyes pierced her gaze into mine. I couldn't tell what she was thinking at all, it was as if I had been conversing with a wall. Her expression was incomprehensible, I was trying to annoy her, but I got nothing ou of it. Not any additional information, not anything that would help me get out of here.
"In the records, it documents our discoveries. The original... Is in a perpetual cycle of cruelty. She is drained dry to produce countless A grade copies, which use even more evergy. And as soon as she has enough energy, she is forced to make another copy again. If the cycle is interrupted by even a second, a magical formation shocks her with electricity. She is also kept in sensory deprivation to prevent escape, and it doubles as torture. " (Xelem)
" And I have to kill her? "
" Yeah. She has lost everything, her friends and family. And if she tries to escape, the progenitor will try to catch her again. "(Xelem)
" What if we killed the progenitor first?"
"... It's not guaranteed that you'll be able to kill the progenitor, but it's guaranteed that you'll be prolonging her suffering. "(Xelem)
"..."
"... "(Xelem)
So I have to make a choice... Fortunately I've pieced together what I needed to do. It's fine, everything will be fine. Yeah, even for your Xelem. Clone or not...
I'll break out of my own mind, nothing will happen if I wander around in this emptiness... Even though things look dreary and awful, everything somehow looks perfect in my eyes right now. Mhmm, it'll just be like usual. Instead of trying to break out of my mind 'physically', I'll phase out of this dimension. Maybe it's more akin to teleportation? Not that there were such concrete concepts inside my own mind, in the first place this place is not a physical place even if. Cna interact with it physically.
Closing my eyes and reopening them, I was in a different plane. This time a dark yellow covered the skies as patches of dark green and lime green littered the ground. It looks like a forest in the distance, and even further away even had tall concrete buildings. It was unusual to see any building more than 5 stories high let alone 20. To put it simply, it exuded the feeling of humanity's prosperity, an ideal dream. But that wasn't my goal, even though I feel like it's extremely important I can't pursue it just yet. Whatever it was, I'm leaving it for later.
I was scared earlier... That if I went out of that space I knew to be my empty memories, I would only enter another equally empty space. It filled me with utter dread, a suffocation akin to asphyxiation caused by being at the bottom of the ocean and bearing all its inhumane pressure. I had it in my mind, I was so sure that there was nothing left for me to return to. I despaired that the last thing I possessed, my own memories, my own precious ego was getting erased.
After the talk with Xelem, I gain my resolve once more. The ability to face anything, it was wonderful isn't it? Rather than truly understanding what I needed to do to get what I want, I just wanted to do this. I just wanted to come to this space and tried to rationalise it. I keep covering things up with a mountain of excuses, but arriving here was my only path out now.
I smiled at the multiple Xelem's present, roughly 5 of them standing before me in a semi circle outline. Their hoods were off and their dark green hair fluttered gorgeously across the wine flowing through here. I grinned straight at them, sending a soft shiver down the end of their spine. I never felt so clear in my mind, it was thanks to the one Xelem that tried to trick me into a deal with her. Why bother empathising and trying to make a deal with me? They have no control. For once, they didn't have the upper hand.
I narrowed my eyes in delight as I walked closer to them, before any of them could react to the stealthy shifting of my feet, a walking method that makes them overestimate the distance between us. I touched the one in the middle and reach out both hands to get the 2 adjacent to her. After a small touch, the 3 of them became coloured in white light as they faded away like melting snow, countless white sparkles floated around where they stood before.
The one on the far left tried to run away as an expression of abject fear overtook her face. Before she could get far, I shifted my location to where she was running towards. In other words, I could materialise anywhere in my own mind. Holding out my own palm, she walked her forehead into my fingers in defeat with dead fish eyes. The one on the far right was still there, she didn't move a single bit. She was arguably the one who brought me to the rest, the one who instilled confidence when I was at my lowest. I really had to thank her, for inspiring me.
Her skill imparts a fragment of her ego into her enemy to corrupt her enemy's mind. She absorbed the egoes of her dead clones right before they died, meaning she was able to absorb egoes and get stronger as she does so, as her skill might enhance her body based on ego amount. So not only can she impart, she can take someone's personality. And at the end of all of that, what she imparted onto my own body was merely 5 small fragments. I was immediately send to that black space right after as a result, locked up in my own memories.
But it wasn't hard to break out considering it was my own mind, it was something I held power and authority over. Her method was to slowly instill more fragments until they engulfed and blocked out the cries of the enemy. In other words, the inbetween state of fusion. It prevents her from absorbing the egoes of random strangers to power herself up, as they may rebel against her. Only, now I was rebelling her in a 1 v 5 manner.
"I want to remember you. Before I consume."
I was the stronger ego, so I digested them instead rather than the other way round. It seems like the deletion of my memories and senses was essentially a deletion of the original's, Kaori's ego. In other words, my mind had already been tempered with, so it gained a slight bit of resistance. Above that, the erasure also caused my ego to be empty. Meaning it can fit way more of the enemy fragments than a normal person can.
Despite saying I was going to head down my own path and forge my own personality, I ended up absorbing the enemy's egoes instead. With their memories and information, it would make it far easier to track down their hidden bases and raid them all. On the downside, I may exhibit attributes of the enemy as subconscious habits. Can't do anything about that, all in the name achieving superiority.
"I've already told you our name." (Xelem?)
"... I said what I said. A name, a unique title that sets you apart from all the rest."
"..." (Xelem?)
She looks down at her opened palms, as she didn't mind dying she wasn't in any particular rush. Perhaps it was myself who was uncharacteristically rushing right now. Despite me being the executioner, and her being the executionee. So? Did you do it like I did? Egoes can only grow through 2 ways, artificially like myself or naturally like her.
Expectatedly, small drops of fragile tears began to drop on the grass beneath us as her knees collapsed. Her shoulders began shaking without any restrain, as if there was an earthquake that only I couldn't feel.
"... Damn... You're so mean!?! Did you enjoy this?!!" (Xelem?)
"... Would that make you feel better? To know that you developing individuality from the other clones at the last moment, a miraculous fruit served as someone else's entertainment? "
"... No... Please don't..." (Xelem?)
I'll give her this last mercy. It was a painful tinge at the corner of my heart, but it was either her or me. I won't yield my own body to an enemy, so obviously I'll defeat her. So I smiled. I laughed. I laughed until tears welled up at the edges of my eyelashes while holding in my guts. I heartily expelled the joy in my soul. I completely smashed apart the atmosphere. It felt like I was gagging on my breath as my own tears spilled out over my cheeks.
"You... I can clearly see that... Even if you pretend, the pity and pain is evident in your eyes let alone your tears." (Xelem?)
"Then please give yourself a name. I want to remember you."
I wiped away the tears that came out while 'laughing'. My heart throbbed as I stood closer to her. There was no point to her being hostile now, I was clearly the stronger ego of this body. And I had even consumed the other 4 and grew stronger. Nevermind 5, it felt like I could absorb 10 of them at once. If she touched me now, she would simply disappear as her body turns into light before getting absorbed into my body.
"I... I'm Xilia ren. I... I don't want to die..." (Xilia)
"Goodbye Xilia."
***
I lifted my eyelids in a struggle against fatigue, the gap clogged with tears rendered my vision exceedingly blurry. To the point I needed movement to tell me what I saw was a living thing. 2 figures, one in a pale green dress and one in a white coat.
"Nghhh..."
I struggled to lift my body up, but everything below my shoulders were immobilised. The 2 figures came closer to me as my point of view began to rise in height. Eventually squinting away the tears a few times, I saw 2 familiar faces that instantly lit my expression up. No longer grimacing with frustration, a crescent moon smile adorned itself over my face.
"Barius... Neli... I'm back!"
"...!! Did you regain your memories? " (Barius)
"... If you're talking about before I went to Central, no. I'm sorry."
Despite her crestfallen face, an odd hue of passion welled up in her eyes as she stared at my dishevelled and weakened self. Was she feeling guilty right now? Honestly, I didn't need it. What I needed was not her sadness for me, but good news, a jubilant mood. The kind of information that would make one jump up for joy. So I wouldn't bring the mood down, at least I hope I won't.
"..... No, it wasn't your fault. Let's go, my subordinate just got back to me. I sent them away many days ago when you first met me, and they finally arrived with the information we needed." (Barius)
Instantly shifting gears, she turned around as she sauntered towards the exit. A brief feeling of weightlessness overtook me as Neli lifted up my body. As what had happened was merely happening in my mind, my body's fatigue should be able to recover in a day or so.