LISTEN TO 'NEVER MEANT TO BELONG' FROM THE BLEACH ANIME DURING THIS CHAPTER TO SET THE MOOD
..
a year later,
it was just any other day, it was supposed to be just any other day.. lothar never thought once he woke up that a few hours later he would crawl back to his house with a few severed fingers holding an unmoving fluffy body in his arms..
it was never supposed to be like this, he was never supposed to be the one surviving the last. he was supposed to leave benny behind, selfish as it may sound, and finally find peace.
his mind was completely blank, his eyes tearless and his face as scarred and stoic as ever. he could not let himself feel, for he knew that he would never resurface from the depth of his anguish.
he would still gaze down his arms from time to time, checking on the red light that engulfed the tiny body, and would notice it flickering ever so softly.
crawling he did not anymore, he stood up and ran with a trail of blood chasing after his tail. he ran so fast that one would not believe that his bones were broken and his ligaments torn.
he arrived at his place, no– their place. placing benny gently on the floor, he grabbed the moss and lightly tapped it on his wounded body
he kept smearing it all over the tiny wolf's body, completely denying and ignoring the fact that he could not see the red light anymore.
'it's my eyes, i'm blind and weak, that's why i can't see him. i'm injured so my powers aren't working now' he kept repeating in his head, smearing the moss. tearless and emotionlessly as he never was before.
[stop lothar, you know it's pointless]
but lothar could not hear the voice of his protector, the voice that kept him company all this time. he just mindlessly smeared more and more moss
his hands worked without his brain giving commands
however, they suddenly stopped and layed on benny's soft face
'cold'
he held him up softly in his embrace
'don't worry, i'll warm you up buddy'
and he went to a corner, sat there and rocked back in forth with cold little benny in his embrace.
..
meanwhile, in a dark, empty place– a place where only a throne made of corpses stood, was a man that looked exactly like lothar, but also had none of his expressions
"we need to burry him" he whispered softly
but no matter what he said or how he said it, lothar's mind was far from his reach, he kept focusing on reading his thoughts but he could not. they were just a chaotic mumble of words that made no sense.
he felt ashamed, he was lothar's guardian. the reason for his existence was to protect lothar's fragile mind, because some experiences in the cave were too much for the latter.
he could endure all the physical pain in the world in lothar's stead but he could not calm his mind, and he could not heal his heart.
so he just kept listening to lothar's incoherent thoughts echoing in the dark domain he calls home, hoping that the latter hasn't fallen into insanity after struggling for 11 years.
'i.... it's-.. my f-fault.. i k..killed- h-hi-'
the only thing that he could understand were these thoughts. he cursed the devil.
..
another 6 years has passed, and more of what lothar used to be had died. he stopped having coversations with locke to alleviate the boredome, in fact he stopped thinking too much about everything and just doing what he always did.
his mind might have been deteriorating but his body had not.
he kept ingesting soul cores, the more he did the better defined the smoke became. and now, not only did he see the complete outline of a being, making him guess the types of beast he's fighting but also he could see different colors. he realized that awakeners had red smoke around them, the deeper the red the more attuned they are with their soul energy. and green was for beings that are none awakeners, finally colourless is for soulless beings– so the dead.
plus the pain that followed each ingestion decreased with time until it stopped hurting all together after 5 years.
furthermore, the voice hasn't spoken to him for 7 years, except the time when it mentioned that it'll take away lothar's fourth sense during his 16th year in the cave.
now a year later, without his sight, hearing, sense of smell and touch he continued to kill even stronger beasts relying on his ability to see souls and the cursed power he gained.
'the power that took benny-
before, lothar would only go hunt for 10 hours a day max fearing that exhaustion would render him sluggish and probably cause his death. but now, he barely felt tired, hell he can hunt without slowing down for 20 consecutive hours and then sleep for the rest 4h.. he still needed to sleep obviously though, to his disappointment since sleeping means dreaming and for the past 6 years he hadn't one had a dreamless night.
also, the dreams were usually nightmares.
..
a few hours later, after having dinner lothar layed down on the cold head floor and closed his eyes.
..
he opened his eyes again and was met by complete darkness, but unlike the cold darkness that filled his sight everyday of his life, this one was familiar and quite comfortable
he walked a few meters, his footsteps made no noise. to any onlooker, it looked like the man was trudging aimlessly but after a few minutes a huge throne appeared;
one made of thousands upon thousands of decapitated heads stuck in horrifying expressions– expressions they had before they died– which showed how brutally they were killed.
as if it is absolutely natural, not minding the creepy throne, the man walked up to it and sat comfortably
he leaned his head on his hand, arm resting on the armset of the throne and looked down at the vast void
" come" he said calmly then hundreds upon hundreds of black shadows arose from the black ground. they each looked like beasts of some kind and in front of them all bowed the strongest; a huge serpent monster or as humans would call him a basilisk
"how have you been, my liege?" the basilik asked respectfully
the man tsked in annoyance " i told you not to call me that"
he straightened his back and looked down at the 300+ beasts' souls that he devoured
he nodded in satisfaction.
'he still doesn't suspect anything, i don't think he would've let me ingest so much of the soul cores if he knew i'm growing an army to kill him. even that bastard can't kill us all'
" for fucks sake, stop bowing"
he never asked the beats to treat him like their king. in fact, he was quite surprised for such treatment.
they all rose at the same time after hearing their liege's order which pissed lothar even more. what he didn't know was that they couldn't help but obey him.
from the second they let out their last breath by the hands of their king and opened their eyes to this empty darkness, they have realized one thing;
they were, putting it simply, utterly and extremely terrified of him.
" sadly all of you lost your memories before coming to this cave, so we still don't know what type of creature he is. and to top it of only 5 of you have enough intelligence to be of any help" he sighed
when he finished talking the wendigo stepped forwards and bowed deeply before standing back up " my liege, i think it is time to stop wasting time and attack"
at that moment silence so defeaning fell down the endless void
" are you crazy?! sweety, don't listen to him! that thing is as stupid as it's ugly. it is far too soon" a beautiful siren stepped up, flipping back her long lushious golden hair
" how dare you call the lord 'sweety'?!" the basilisk replied in unhidden rage
" you guys are being a bit too noisy.." a shy banshee whispered as she fidgeted with her hands
the basilik turned towards her and glared " are you saying that what this fish said was okay?"
the banshee jumped in fright at the basilisk's tone and ran away towards lothar's throne then hid behind it. she kept peeking her head from behind it making her look almost cute.
" who are you calling a fish?! i'm not an ugly mermaid! i'm a gorgeous siren! and a princess at that! you know if you had genitals like any other human male i wouldv-"
" THAT'S ENOUGH" lothar's voice reverberated throughout the vast void, shaking it to its foundation. some weaker beasts lost their balance and fell to the ground in fear
just the amount of aura behind his voice shook the space that seemed unending and unshackable.
the 4 generals realized their blunder and immediately walked back in their respective places forming a line in front of the throne.
they bowed their heads not daring to look at the monster in the eye
" we're sorry, my liege" they said in unison
lothar's breathing was heavy, his citrine eyes blazing in anger and hands gripping the armset as if it was his enemy
ever since benny died, his temper has been uncontrollable.
he looked at the only useful beasts he gathered and breathed in
[you need them for the plan, you can't do anything rash yet lothar. calm down]
after hearing locke's calm voice and sound logic, he relaxed back on the throne as if nothing happened, the air calmed down and the generals all thanked their lucky stars for surviving
" whatever.. i don't care what you do here as long as you don't bother me. now unto what you said" he turned towards the wendigo
" i think it is early too, i don't think i'm strong enough to take him on. plus, i still have things i need to learn from my master"
they all nodded and agreed, the wendigo sighed and accepted too
" before i go back, where is he?" lothar asked
they all looked at each other with uncertainty, except for the basilisk who immediately stepped up
" he is sleeping, my liege" he said confidently
lothar nodded and got up, he went down the platform and stood in front of the 4 creatures
" take care until i see you again" he said as dark shadows started to swallow him
"oh, i almost forgot..
will you already tell me your names?" he asked nonchalantly before disappearing.
the generals were startled by what he said, their expressions almost funny, but only the banshee looked unfazed
'Bad' she thought before turning her back and going back to hide behind her king's throne
although each had different thoughts inside their heads, the rest 3 all shared an underlying confusion
'he wants us to have names?'
lothar didn't know now, but that simple question had many meanings behind it