December 16.
I told Jon we had to go away for a while. At first, he was hesitant about the idea, but later he agreed in a rather passive way. We started by exiting the crack in the back, there was no one, no one saw us. Maybe they will come looking for us, maybe not. In any case, I want to spare myself the sermons, the clarity that could throw at me. This is a desperate gesture, and I am aware of it, but I believe that all is not lost, and if you think this, it means that you are lost regardless.
As we progressed the effect of the zone faded more and more. Colors began to pop up and the light in the sky became a strange shade, indefinable in words.
We stopped a couple of times, to rest and to eat something. Let's try to take it easy on the supplies, as they are limited and I'm not sure I'll find more soon.
Behind our village there is a very dense and vast forest. So extensive that it doesn't seem to end. Occasionally we encounter some old-world rubble trapped in the vegetation. Everything is stopped in time, and at the same time it flows in an intrinsic way. Children grow up, people age, and die, bodies decay and blood flows. But the rest seems suspended in limbo.
December 18.
Since my wife is gone, Jon hasn't said a word. Nevertheless, when we were in the village, I saw him more active and talkative on other aspects. Now he does nothing but investigate the void. He doesn't even look me in the eye anymore, it seems to be talking to a mannequin. Before he just nodded every time I asked him questions, now not even that. Every now and then he has coughing fits, quite strong. Yesterday he was seized. From time to time, I take off his shirt to check if other writings have appeared on his body. He was always a weak kid, but now ...
We have been walking for a long time. We are still in the forest, but the light has changed. Almost nothing is seen. I brought some oil lamps that I had bought some time ago from the traveling merchant who had visited the village. Fortunately, a kind of luminescent mushroom grows in this area, and from time to time some animals pass by emitting a white light. They look harmless, but I don't come close anyway.
December 19.
I saw one of those creatures. It was inside an abandoned house that we found, half engulfed by vegetation. I went in to check if anyone was there, and if we could rest there for a while. The house had ancient features; it was entirely made of wood. The furniture, the kitchen, was intact, but there was nothing so useful, at least so I thought.
Browsing around I noticed a crack behind the bookcase. Air was leaking. Pushing the bookcase, I discovered a hiding place. Inside was a filthy bed, talismans hanging everywhere, an open book, and several rations of canned food.
I was afraid the owner might come back, so I collected as many supplies as I could.
At one point I stop, blocked by a noise coming from the floor above. The noise made one think of something blowing on a rusty metal wheel. This was getting closer; I could hear it coming down the creaking stairs. Jon and I hid under the bed. I shut his mouth even though he is mute, I did it without thinking about it.
The creature somehow noticed the uncovered opening behind the bookcase, stopped abruptly. The sound was close, I could hear it on my neck. Out of the corner of my eye, I could make out the creature. It looked like a twisted caricature of a human being. She wore something white, had a mask with a strange grin, and was surrounded by symbols.
After five minutes the creature had gone upstairs, and I took the opportunity to escape. I have been running for some time.
If that thing had gotten into the crack, I don't know how I would have done it, I don't know if I would have been able to defend myself, and above all to defend Jon.
Of course, I would. I would have done it, even with my bare hands, even if I were dying. I must protect him, that's the only thing I have left. If I were to lose him, if I were to lose you, I ...
December 21.
I had a nightmare where I was killing Jon. There was a mirror. I looked like one of those things.
I woke up and immediately checked Jon. He was leaning with his back on the backpack. His eyes were open, and he was looking into the darkness beyond the tall trees.
From the promontory where we camped, I noticed a beam of light.
I followed the light. It was not easy at all, and the constant restlessness of being attacked didn't help. However, I managed to get to a point. It was the Nameless City, also called the Spiral City. I had heard of it.
I decide to enter. To be admitted I first had to look through a kind of telescope connected to the ground with a tube. I think they do this to check if I'm human.
Suddenly the huge hatch opened, and I was admitted, not before being hit by the two entrance guards.
The Spiral City extends underground. It is made up of tunnels, some narrow, others very wide, by real underground squares, by approximate hierarchies and merchants at will. It is one of the crossroads of the market and culture. It gets bigger and bigger with each passing day, and it's all lit up, full of electric light.
I consider myself lucky to have found such a place. I decide to spend the night here. I barter a few cans of canned food and manage to scrape together enough cash for a bed.
I really hope not ...
December 22.
I spent all day looking for an exorcist. From what I know, no one believes in the power of spiritual reparation anymore. Nobody believes in anything anymore. In this city this thing is ingrained as a terminal illness.
I've tried so many times, wasted so much oxygen, my mouth is as dry as a desert dune. Here people only think about waking up earlier than others to sell better than others. I don't conceive it.
I heard people disappear here. They get sucked away by other people like them, they just don't realize it. They disappear, in a bubble of nothing. They collide with each other and sink into the spiral.
I tried to go to the bottom, where the tunnels become wider, so much so that I have more and more the impression of being in another world. The monotonous light radiates everything, always, or almost. In this place, in fact, humans have resumed living in a more cyclical way, to regain the sense of darkness and light.
There, the darkness becomes more frequent. The natural darkness of the sky is replaced by a nauseating black wall. Houses become sickly; people move slower. At one point there was a cliff, in which only the void stood beyond it. The end of the universe, of that universe.
Suddenly I hear a call from behind. It was a man, with a completely white mask. At first glance he looked like one of those creatures.
I heard you are looking for an exorcist.
He told me. I said yes. I told him about what had happened to me.
You won't find anything here ... This city lost its soul a long time ago, and it makes all those who stay there for too long lose it.
The man had taken me to his apartment. It was a single room, half bare, with hanging amulets, scattered documents, and strange writing on the walls. I could smell incense. He made me sit down. He didn't take off his mask even in his house.
I know where you can find it ...
The man said as he made a drink.
But you don't know it. For this, the only way to establish knowledge in you is through knowledge itself!
The man handed me the chalice. The liquid was green, it glowed. A strong smell.
Drink, and you will find the exorcist who can save your son ... Wait, I hear him scream, I can hear him. Oh! These walls! These walls are nothing more than a pile of corpses in the middle of the dust ...
Without thinking too much, I drank that juice. Later ...
Later ... in my eyes, only darkness ... I saw no truth, only darkness. I fell into that cliff, in the end beyond the road. The end after the universe. I dreamed nothing, and I forgot who I was and why ...
December 22.
I woke up, the man was gone. I was in the middle of the dirty road of the last layers. Moving made my bones and nerves ache. It was like that for half an hour. The only thing I could think of was Jon; I had left him alone for who knows how long.
What did I drink? I do not know any truth.
I stand up. I gain sensitivity, and I notice that my panties are down. My lower back burns me. I have nothing left in my pockets.
Getting back up was one of the hardest things I ever had to face.
During the descent I did not notice how far I had gone, I was just thinking of finding someone to help me. At that moment, it was me against thousands of stairs. Along with the pains that afflict my body.
Jon is fine. I had to deal with everything but now it is ok. I tried to talk to him ... His catatonic state seems to have worsened. He doesn't look me in the eye, He just looks one point. I took it but the food hardly seems to enter his mouth.
It's time to get out of this hell. This is hell. Even the outside world, with all its adversities, is more pleasant than this hole of a city ...
December 23.
The city without a name is an appropriate term. City without a soul is even better.
I feel the wind on my cheeks, and I am happier. The noises of the underground disappear with every step.
I had a dream where I was killing Jon. There was a mirror. It was just me.