Chereads / Making the Demon Lord Love Me / Chapter 91 - Chapter 8: Punish the world instead

Chapter 91 - Chapter 8: Punish the world instead

"Albaric," Ace called as they stepped out into the courtyard.

The sun was rising from the east casting a dazzling orange glow over the white palace walls. Just beyond the gardens were turning green with the coming of spring. Birds were still singing their night songs. The air was cold and sharp but refreshing.

Ace waited earnestly for Albaric to turn back. The others were already a distance away getting ready to mount the horses that had been brought out. From the moment they arrived, Ace had been waiting for his chance.

Albaric looked back with an unusually guarded smile.

"What is it?"

"Can I talk to you before we go?"

Albaric's expression became rigid. He glanced over at Rena who met his gaze. Finally, he turned back to Ace with a sad smile.

"I don't know if that's a good idea, "

"Please, "Ace entreated.

Albaric inhaled deeply, "Okay then. Let's take a walk,"

They started toward the gardens along their usual path. The roses were already starting to bud. They were coated with morning dew. After walking for a while quietly, Ace turned to Albaric seriously.

"I'm sorry, Albaric," he said gravely. "For what I did, to Rena, to you."

"When I was a boy, "Albaric looked ahead vacantly, "I used to sneak through these gardens on my way to the temple. I wasn't allowed to be there but I didn't care. My sister lived in the temple and I wanted to see her. We were twins, you know? I could always tell when she needed me even when we were apart.

One day, I was creeping through the hedge groves and I bumped into this tall metal-clad figure. He stared down at me from underneath this dark metal armour with a huge sword in his hand and said, 'Are you lost or are you here on purpose?'

I looked at this towering column of a man and of course, I lied. I told him hastily that I was lost. He swooped down and picked me. At first, I was afraid but then he said, 'everyone gets lost once in a while, but not everyone can find the way back. If the path back is too perilous you can always decide to walk forward. Some people just forget this. Then there are others. They fight so hard to return, but when they get there it's not the same as they remember.

I had no idea what he meant at the time. I just stared at him and he started to laugh. If I had known how rarely Valentus laughed, I might have treasured it more."

"Valentus?"

"He was my master, the last sword saint. I wish you could have met him, Ace,"

"What happened to him?"

"He died during the war as well."

"How did he die?"Ace asked quietly.

"He was killed by the last demon lord of the west, "Albaric returned. "Clover's father,"

"I didn't know that, "Ace said slowly.

"He'd think it was a joke that I inherited his title," Albaric chuckled, "He said I was the laziest boy he had ever met. Still, I think my lack of ambition was the reason he taught me in the first place. He said greed was the reason behind every war. Behind all sin. Greed was ultimately the greatest source of human misery."

"Albaric..."Ace hesitated.

"I don't think you're greedy Ace," he interrupted, "but the desire is a powerful thing. It makes great promises in our hearts but rarely delivers,"

"I didn't steal the necklace for the reason you think, "Ace protested. "I really did believe Michael that the human world would be destroyed! "

"And I really want to believe you but that's half the problem."

" I never wanted to hurt you or Rena!" Ace entreated.

"Maybe you didn't," Albaric conceded, "but you did. Look. Don't get me wrong. I think you have the potential to be someone truly great. You could be a hero even better than me if you wanted. However, I also think there is a possibility that you could become someone even worse than Clover or Michael. And while that possibility remains, I can't help you. This is something you have to decide yourself, "

Albaric left Ace standing rigidly still in a whirl of half-opened flowers.

Sometime later they were riding through the forest on the outskirts of the capital.

"How did It go? " Bird asked in a low voice.

Ace shook his head stiffly. Bird looked ahead once more.

"He just needs time, Ace,"Bird reassured.

"We don't have time," Ace rode ahead solemnly.

Later that evening, they set up camp for the night. The stars shun brightly blanketing the night sky as far as the eye could see. Albaric and Rena were at one side in a lively conversation with bird. Albaric had that effect, Ace thought wistfully. He knew how to make someone smile...

Ace's eyes were set so dead ahead, he didn't notice someone sitting beside him.

"It's good to be back, no?"

Ace glanced over at Clover then back to the fire.

"So you're talking to me again?" He asked flatly.

"No," Clover replied mockingly, " I'm talking to the fire and you're interrupting our conversation."

"You're not angry anymore?" Ace asked wearily.

" On the contrary, I've never been angrier at you. But I'm proposing a temporary truce," Clover said quietly, "because you seem really sad,"

Ace gave a weak smile, "Do you think I'm a good person, Clover?"

" I told you before..." Clover started.

"You don't believe in good or bad," Ace interceded, "I know, but objectively speaking. Are the things I do very wicked? You must have met many people during your life. Do I seem like a good person amongst those you have met?"

" You're young," Clover replied drily, "it's a time to make mistakes and to decide who you want to be. Even if I could draw up a scale of the things I've seen or the people I've met in order of goodness to wickedness, no one stays the same. Everyone can change. In ten years, you'll look back and it will all seem so far removed from how you feel right now."

"What if I look back and the sum of everything I've done can only be said to be bad? Will I be wicked then?"

"Do you do the things you do out of wickedness?" Clover leant on one hand watching him with a blank expression.

"No. At least I don't think so, but does anybody? I'm sure the evilest people in the world still have a reason for the things they do."

"And in this world, who decides what is evil? Does society or do you ?"

"I do."Ace cast a wayward glance at Clover.

"Then your heart will be the judge. If you do things that your heart can't forgive, you'll face a worse punishment than anyone else could ever give you. If you don't want to be wicked, you have to live your life according to the caprices of your heart."

"And if the world doesn't let me do that?"

"Then punish the world instead."

Ace's jaw clenched but he remained staring ahead into the fire.

"What about everyone else?" He said his voice barely a whisper.

" What about them?" Clover's eyes narrowed, "Whose ever will is stronger, will be the victor. That's all this world is. Winners and losers."

"How can you say that after what I did to you?"

"Because you can't win without the prospect of losing. Everyone has to take some losses at some point. But you ought to know, even though you're winning, for the time being, I'll get what I want in the end. I do so hate to lose,"

Ace stared at Clover soberly," Is everything a game you?"

"Don't hate the player, hate the game."

"I don't want to play anymore." Ace swallowed uneasily. "I don't mean to do the things I do. I don't mean to hurt you or anyone else. I would take it all back if I could," He felt a lump rising in his throat.

"It's much too late for that," Clover commented drily," I tried to warn you. I suggest instead of crying that you try to make peace with it. It's true, they won't forgive you. They won't pity you. So all you have is your conviction. Own it and be true to yourself,"

" I'm not sure I can," Ace gulped, " I feel...afraid. I'm scared this darkness inside will just swallow me up one day. It's only gotten worse. I can feel it creeping under my skin."

"I thought this would happen eventually," Clover sighed, " stubbornness can only get you so far."

"What should I do, Clover?" Ace exhaled a shaky breath, "You said I'm not dark but that's all I feel. Somewhere out in the wasteland something just broke inside and no matter what I try, I can't seem to fix it. You know everything. Tell me how to fix it,"

"If I knew that..." Clover's voice trailed, " Maybe we wouldn't be here,"

Ace was quiet for a while. He blinked back tears staring into the fire.

"Once we get the box back, maybe you should just open it before it's too late. Who knows what I'll do next time,"

" If you feel this badly about it, why don't you just stop?"

"It's too late," Ace said in a small voice.

"No, we will get the box back," Clover said sharply, "Then, all you'll have to do is open it for me and this will all be over,"

A strange smile came over Ace's face, "I don't think so, "

" What do you mean?" Clover turned to him gravely, "Ace?"

" I do believe you, Clover. Whatever it is you're not telling me, I don't think you would go to all this trouble if it wasn't something terrible. If the demon world isn't destroyed something horrible is going to happen, right?" Ace said with a trembling smile.

"If you know then why won't you give it to me?"Clover's brow furrowed.

"I know it's wicked and I'm so afraid. But you see, the thing is Clover... I think I'd rather watch the whole world burn than give you that necklace. That's the truth," Ace broke into a hollow laugh.

"I hope you don't mean that," Clover said flatly.

"Oh but I do. Even while I'm still regretting the things I've already done, I'm already thinking about something much worse." He expelled the words wildly." My heart doesn't speak to me like it should. My mind is what tells me to act. I do as it compels me with predetermined mechanisms for right and wrong, but then inside I hear this little voice whispering ' why should i'? And every time I push it down and I try to be good, it comes back with a vengeance. SCREAMING in my ears, 'just do what you want!' And I so want to... that's why I feel afraid. Yes. Very afraid,"

Clover inhaled deeply. They pressed Ace's face to their chest. He was still trembling as Clover put their arms around him. Neither spoke for several minutes.

"What have I done to you? " Clover uttered under their breath.