"You won't believe how far I can go until I show it to you..."
✨1✨
The early evening wind blew across the veranda, the fresh scent of rain still lingering in the air. The rain has fallen only a few hours ago, thereby leaving behind a cool weather.
The cool wind blew past Ayah's face, causing her hijab to inflate for a few seconds and slowly deplate afterwards. She closed her eyes, sporting a peaceful smile and savouring the feel of the wind against her face, sighing instinctively.
"Wait... I'll tell you tonight I promise."
The words suddenly rang in her head making her throw open her eyes immediately. The words kept on echoing in her ears and she struggled to remember where she had heard those words from, was it her teacher? No it couldn't have been, he was too closed off to make a promise.
After few minutes, reality dawned on her when the face of the culprit flashed in her memory, drawing out an involuntary sigh from her chest. She shook her head violently in a bid to remove the memory from her head but that didn't seem to work, drawing out yet another sigh from her - this time of frustration.
"It's a year today." She muttered, talking to no one in particular.
It was late May the next year, 2011 at six pm in the evening. Yasmin and Ayah were currently seated in the veranda of the top floor in Ayah's home with only the sky and fencing of the house in their clear view.
After a long day of class and projects, both girls decided to take a quiet time up the building, just enjoying the weather left behind by the rain and nothing more.
"What's that?" Yasmin who was seated quietly beside her asked, peeking open one eyelid. She had been resting on her chair, also savouring the feel of the wind against her face with a small smile playing on her lips when her friend had talked.
"Sister Barakah, it's been a year." She repeated.
Her eyes were trained beyond the fence and her voice sounded distant. She looked towards the sky just above the fence, looking through them for answers she knew were impossible to find.
The shape of the clouds that evening though were quite fascinating. They looked down towards Ayah with an oddly comforting and sympathizing gaze - It's okay my dear, it'll come to pass - Ayah could almost hear the clouds shout.
Yasmin's mouth formed an 'O', morphing into a sympathizing one moments later and she stretched out her hand, placing it gently on Ayah's shoulder and squeezed reassuring. Ayah looked sideways at Yasmin's hand then face, in time to see her talk.
"It's okay."
She cooed, eyes squinting with pity and, was it adoration Ayah saw in them? She couldn't tell, but it shouldn't be adoration. I haven't done anything worth that - she told herself, moving her gaze back to the sky just as Yasmin's hand dropped from her shoulder.
The clouds had taken another odd shape, now looking like a mom holding her child to her chest. Ayah could imagine that was her mom holding two years old her in her arms and a smile of admiration spreading over cheeks - her mom would surely do that.
The baby cloud though, didn't seem to be happy in it's mom's hold. It looked like it was forced to sit there and was on the verge of tears. It's eyes though - only visible to Ayah - were not glassy but held an unknown emotion and untold pain in them.
Ayah immediately knew that wasn't her little self but rather Barakah - she'd always be happy to be in her mom's hold, Barakah undoubtedly wouldn't be. A giggle rippled out of her throat due to her imagination and she smiled widely - what's even wrong with me.
"Why do you do that?" Yasmin's voice said, bringing Ayah back to the present.
"Do what?" She replied, turning sideways to face Yasmin who was already looking at her. "Find the sky funny. I mean, there's nothing interesting up there." She grimaced, pointing towards the horizon for emphasis.
"Well... Maybe, to you. I do find it interesting, just read the forms." She shrugged, giving the sky a quick glance then looking back to her friend. Yasmin sighed knowingly, she and Ayah turning their gazes to the sky in synchronization.
"It's too plain." Yasmin complained, squinting her eyes in a bid to read the clouds. Ayah laughed at this, choosing not to say anything in reply.
The sky began to change into a red daze, probably because the sun wasn't out due to the rain that fell. The red colour darkened by minutes and the rest of the sky grew darker with the red also getting darker and probably going to turn dark soon.
The call to prayer was called moments later from a mosque nearby, the voice of the Muazim, very suiting to Ayah's ears. Few minutes into the call, Yahya trotted out of the house with Yuhsha holding onto his right hand, heading towards the gate.
He was putting on an ash coloured jalabiya - men wear - with a white skull cap kissing his medium-ly barbed hair. Little of the hair behind his head slowly leading to his back was left open by the cap. Yuhsha however was cladded in a similar outfit of his own exact size, hopping happily beside his father - probably singing one of the rhymes he's learned at school.
As if feeling Ayah's gaze on him, he turned around and looked up to the veranda, immediately spotting both of them. Ayah gave a small smile his way. He didn't reciprocate though, he just gave a gesture of placing his hand beside his hear, telling her to go pray.
She nodded a sigh at his retreating figure, feeling more fed up than she actually seemed to notice. The way Yahya had been over the year was too toxic for his family but he, didn't seem to notice all of that.
He was still brooding over his lost business deals and tarnished image among his friends over the year. As a businessman, his reputation was definitely one of the most important things to Yahya, probably more important than his family at some point. Barakah however, didn't do him much good in that aspect. Her elope had led to lots of questionings which eventually led to things being said and reputations being destroyed.
He could always feel the stares and whispers that went after him whenever he walked past his employees, he could even hear some of them.
"I heard his daughter left home? It's such a pity."
"He must be so lost and devastated right now."
"I always knew he couldn't handle his family peacefully, he's too harsh for anyone's good. His daughter was probably fed up of all the nagging."
"I wonder how he's coping."
"Serves him right, at least he'll keep mute for sometime. He talks too much."
He could hear the hushed whispers as they seemed to be the only thing going on in his surroundings. He could see the faces and hear the voices and how they'd suddenly stop talking whenever they noticed his presence. It pained him to see the reputation he spent years building shatter before his very own eyes... within seconds. It pained him how fast people were willing to dispose lifetime friendships for their reputations, making him wish he had a choice too.
"We've got to go pray." Yasmin reminded, bringing Ayah out of her day dream - probably evening dream. "Yeah sure..." She trailed off, sounding distant once again.
The sky, as Ayah had now taken note, were almost fully dark and it was getting hard to see where they were. Ayah stood up from the chair, wincing slightly when her weight was fully rested on her leg, probably from sitting too long.
She took out her phone from the front pocket of the skinny jeans she was putting on, turning on its flash which momentarily turns her blind. Slowly adjusting to the light, she glanced over to Yasmin who had also stood up and picked up her chair, moving into the house with Yasmin trailing closely behind.
She closed the door to the veranda behind her, pulling out all of the four locks and making sure the door was secure before venturing down the stairs.
Yahya had always told them stories of thieves jumping into houses in the middle of the night through openings like the veranda if the door wasn't properly locked, and had succeeded in instilling the habit in them. Even if Ayah now knew it wasn't possible as far as her memory could go, to jump that high into the second floor, she still made sure to lock the door at night more out of habit than fear.
They both dropped the plastic chairs in their hold under the stair walls, one inside the other before climbing back up, headed to Ayah's room. Ayah turned off her torch the moment her hands were free, stuffing her phone back into her pocket just by the time they were rounding the corner to her room.
The space upstairs was basically a second parlour, a set of chairs placed neatly around, spaced away from each other enough to give quite the right space to pass through. A centre table stood right were all the chairs faced; Two one-seaters, a two-seater and a three-seater. The chairs were a plain brown fur-like colour, having golden stripes along the designs that might get you thinking it's real fur.
A television was placed gingerly by a side in the parlour, a glass shelf situated underneath it containing a DVD and the likes. An opening was around a corner of the parlour, leading to the all the rooms. Ayah's on one side, her mom's and dad's facing each other and an extra room used for laundry.
They both sauntered into the room, Ayah walking into the bathroom first while Yasmin sat in the bed, patiently waiting her turn.
"More than five minutes and I swear I'm barging in!" She yelled, chuckling at the end. She knew her threat was enough to make Ayah move faster in doing her business as she's carried out her threat before.
She could hear the sound of water rushing and Ayah faceplanting on the sink, causing her laughter to continue as an uproar. Ayah gave a loud hiss, loud enough for Yasmin to hear but still doesn't slow down.
Having calmed down and all traces of the early laugh fest gone, Yasmin studied her friend's room. Making a fake face of disapproval at the obviously neat room. She made a mental note to press on Ayah's nerves about how neat - dirty - the room wasn't.
The lailac painted room was a medium sized one with two wardrobes rested against the wall that sat opposite the entrance to the room. Beside it was a bed, big enough to sport two teenagers and maybe an additional one. It took about a quarter of the space in the room, occupying one corner and spreading against two walls; the one the wardrobe was at, and the free one.
On the wall the bed wasn't resting on, sat a dressing mirror. it sat atop a drawer that had a draw-in chair situated before it. Scattered in the table, were the duo's make up kit. A concealer, lipstick, powders, perfumes and the likes could be spotted on the table.
In the centre of the room however, was a study table. Books were scattered atop it, ranging from wasted papers to newly bought books. An abacus was seated on the table - mainly because Salamah loved having it there. It had two draw-in chairs beside it, making whoever sat on either side of it to have a clear side view of the door.
Yasmin moved to sit on the study chair, inwardly counting the time left before she would barge into the bathroom. She looked around the room from where she was newly sat, noticing Ayah's drawer that she'd never really paid any attention to. Feeling the need to be adventurous at that time of the day, she moved towards it.
It was seated at the foot of the bed, on it was an alarm clock, Ayah's wristwatch and the earrings she had worn to school earlier. It had two drawers afront, both handles still intact.
She opened the first one to a nearly empty drawer, only an old battered wristband was in it. Closing it in a disappointed state, she pulled open the second one, hoping to find in it, an interesting view.
The view though, was quite boring too but not as boring as you'd expect. A note was in it. Tempted to pick out the note and read it without Ayah's consent, she shook the thought of her head.
It's breaching of privacy, she trusts me enough for that, she thought, mentally convincing herself to not do it. What if it's a love letter? You love reading love letters! an inner voice spoke, nearly breaking her firm resolve.
"Not happening." She popped audibly, hoping that would be enough to shut her inner self.
"What's not happening?"
Ayah who had just stepped out of the bathroom, met Yasmin shaking her head profusely and popping a 'Not happening'. it made her curious and eager to know what was making her friend soliloquize.
"Nothing." Yasmin shrugged, picking up the letter and inspected it, whilst still controlling the urge to read it and also hoping it'd catch Ayah's attention, prompting her to give her the go-ahead.
"What's that?" Ayah furrowed her eyebrows, moving towards Yasmin and cleaning the water off her face with the hem of her shirt. "I thought you'd know." She shrugged, still inspecting the letter.
Ayah sat down beside Yasmin, collecting the note from her and equally inspecting. "Is it a love letter?" Yasmin beamed, her eyes glinting with untold excitement. "Love what!? Of course not, why would it be?" Ayah chuckled softly, amusement clear in her eyes.
"How could you even think that?" She giggled.
"Well that's what I thought it was." Yasmin defended, her grin dropping slightly. "We could read it..." She trailed off, planting an idea inside Ayah's head.
"I don't know... It could be Salamah's?" She shrugged, dropping the letter on the table. "Oh come on! You are her sister, she can't be too angry." Yasmin whined, she didn't know why, but she felt so attached to the contents of the letter, whatever it might be.
"I don't know..." Ayah replied, sounding very unsure.
"Let's check it okay, it might even belong to you." Yasmin encouraged, she wasn't backing down anytime soon.
"Whatever, let's pray first." She sighed getting up from the bed. "We are so reading that note!" Yasmin exclaimed, jumping out of the bed and headed towards the wardrobes, drawing out a prayer mat from on top Ayah's.
She spread it on the floor, facing a direction known to be where they'd face whenever they wanted to offer a prayer. She hurriedly sprinted into the toilet right afterwards, leaving Ayah to wait for her on the mat.
Ayah wore her own hijab, settling down on the mat to wait for Yasmin while getting lost in her own thoughts.
Though the letter didn't seem too private, else Salamah would have kept it somewhere more confidential than a drawer beside the bed. She knew the letter might even be hers, but the aura around the letter just screamed 'dangerous' as collected and blank as it seemed. There was just something off about it, like it contained bad luck of some sort.
Yasmin appeared out of the bathroom few seconds later, sending Ayah to her feet. She also wore her own hijab and stood beside Ayah, ready to commence their prayer. They spent the next five minutes in prayer, both praying for what they needed most, including a bright future.
"Let's go read it now."
Yasmin was the first to break the silence after they finished praying, she was barely able to keep her thoughts off the letter while she prayed. "Sure." Ayah rolled her eyes, trusting her friend to be heavily invested in the letter they were about to read.
Ayah pulled off her hijab the moment her legs were planted on the floor, folding it in place right after. Yasmin followed suit, hurriedly taking a sit on the bed, already in position for the reading.
"Dramatic." Ayah smiled when she noticed Yasmin's action. "Call me whatever." Yasmin giggled, not taking the slightest offence to Ayah's words. Ayah sat beside her friend, picking up the letter from the table and opened it slowly.
Right above the letter was a label 'ᴛᴏ ᴀʏᴀʜ' written in a bold handwriting Ayah could easily recognize as Barakah's own. "I told you it might be yours." Yasmin said in a knowing voice, nudging Ayah playfully by the side.
That wasn't much of Ayah's concern though, the letter was what left her speechless. She scanned the letter right to the very end and it was written unmistakably in her sister's handwriting.
"Who's writing is this though?" Yasmin asked, getting the hint that Ayah wasn't going to reply to her previous tease. "Tch! It's sister Barakah's." She scoffed, a grimace already present on her face. "What!?" Yasmin exclaimed confusedly, scanning through the letter also.
"What's it doing here then, and it's addressed to you." She said, the surprise slowly wearing out of her voice. She earned nothing but a simple shrug from Ayah, who was also still getting over the surprise. "That's why we have to read it." Yasmin nodded, happy that she had even suggested they read the letter in the first place.
Without another word, both their eyes dived into the letter, reading it as slow as they could. Dread filled Ayah's stomach at the thought of what the content might be, but continued reading nonetheless.
"Dear Ayah, [The letter began] By the time you are reading this, I must have been long gone. I don't know how long it'll take you to find this, but hopefully before your hatred for me has passed it's turning point. I know I promised to tell you tonight but I couldn't find it in me to watch your face while you digest the information, hence the reason for the letter. I really can't face you, knowing what I've done and probably the toll it might take in your life. Just please don't hate me no matter what.
It all started when...
AN: Finally!
I'm really happy with the turn up in the previous chapter, thanks guys!