Kace's phone goes off again, and he jumps at the chance to get it out. He reads the message, smiles, and responds as if his life depends on it. I know who it is- Lucien or whatever the fuck his name is- but I've never heard of him. Not once has Kace even mentioned him, but now he wants to go meet with him? Trying to ignore it, I take one hand off the wheel to turn up the radio and my driving speed increase instantly.
Kace looks at me oddly. "Is this your favorite song?"
I listen then, not really certain what's even playing, and I realize that this is a horrible song; one of the worst. "Yes."
He doesn't question me but instead goes back to his phone. I can help but to feel irritated. Kace is the only person I've dated that can ignore me and pretend that I'm not there. I'm probably just selfish.
"What does this guy want from you?" I ask, trying to get his attention.
"I'm not sure yet," Kace answers. "It's why I wanted to come so badly. Lucien is- Oh, take a left up here."
I sigh, but do as I'm told, and turn into a very unused road. In my whole life, I have never been to this side of county, and it felt… off. There was too much space between the houses, and the spaces were covered in trees and forests. If someone came out in front of my truck, I wouldn't be surprised.
As I drove farther, Kace started to get more excited, and I knew we were close. There were no more turns to be made, so Kace didn't give me anymore directions, but when the house came into view, I almost passed it. "No, it's that one," Kace said quickly, and I turned into the driveway hesitantly.
The house was old and very simple. It was two stories high but it didn't look like it was expensive, but more run down instead. The paint on the house was a light blue color, but some of it was stained with green or black from the trees or whatever else that could have happened to it. The garage door was open when we got door, and inside was a man covered in car oil. When he saw us, he whipped his hands with a towel lying in the open hood of his car, and came towards us. But this movement was unnecessary; Kace had already made his way out of my truck.
"Lucien!" he yelled as he ran towards him, and Lucien stopped and smiled before Kace suddenly tackled him. Lucien held his ground but swayed under the weight before hugging Kace closely to him. I just sat in the tuck, surprised. There was no way Kace could have done that with me.
When Kace looked back towards me and smiled, I hesitantly got out of the truck and walked over to them. As I got closer, I looked Lucien over. He was about as tall as me, but skinnier, in way that made you think he didn't eat much. Underneath all of the oil that smudged his forehead and face, one could say that he was pretty. His features were strong in his arms and his shoulders, but the rest of him was delectate- he had a baby-face.
"You must be Nix," he said to me as I got closer and smiled, "Kace's boyfriend, right?"
I looked over at Kace, surprised, but he avoided me and looked at the ground instead. "Is he in there?" he asked Lucien.
"Yeah, go on," he answered, grinning. "He's waiting for you."
With that, Kace took off into the house through the garage, and I was left with a stranger. "Who's in there?" I asked.
"Matthew," he replied and started walking to the door himself. "Come on, I'll get you something to drink."
I followed behind him slowly into his house, and was surprised when I found it clean and neat. The walls and furniture looked odd and worn like it came with the house, but everything was so order and neat, I almost didn't notice. Even from the inside, the air was hot and earthy like outside, but mix with the smell of cigarettes the bubbled up my craving for one.
Lucien led me into a small kitchen and gestured for me to sit down at the table. I noticed as I sat down that there were only two chairs, and that, like everything else, it was very clean. Behind me, Lucien was at the sink, and I could hear the sound of water as I waited. When he reappeared, he had a glass of water in one hand, and a wet towel in the other. Setting the glass down in front of me, he sat himself in the other chair and began wiping off the oil from his face.
"Car project?" I guessed. It didn't look like he went much of anywhere.
Lucien shrugged. "Gives me something to do, and time to think," he answered while trying to get some of the oil out of his blonde hair. "I'm guessing Kace didn't tell you much?"
"He told me nothing," I answered with obvious irritation in my voice, but Lucien just kept smiling.
"I'm surprised he even agreed to let you come. Even more so that you're dating," he said calmly. "I'm guessing he at least told you about his past- what happened to him." It wasn't really a question, so he knew. How much had Kace told him about me?
"It's more like I figured it out, and he had no choice but to tell me," I said, and this made him smile more.
Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a box of cigarettes and offered me one. I didn't take it, but instead took out of my own and used his lighter, my body urging for it. We both took an intake and released our smoke at the same time, creating a fog around our heads.
"I was there," Lucien said, after a moment. "So was Mathew."
I was stunned into silence, not sure what I should say. It was the first time that I saw him without a smile, and now the shadows fell on his face in grim angles. He didn't look like it before, but it was now obvious. There was reason to how he acted and how he looked; even to why he lived way out here where almost no one could find him. Like Kace, he was still kidnapped.
"We don't talk about it much, but this is good for us; good for Kace and Mathew. They need this time, so I must thank you for bringing him," he said carefully, then added with a smile, "And I must also thank you for taking care of him. I didn't even think he could have a boyfriend. You must be very patient."
I nodded, but inside I felt guilty. He was wrong, I wasn't patient and there was nothing to thank me for. There was no difference between me and every other guy out there. Or maybe there was; I was probably worse.
Suddenly, Kace jogged through a hallway that I had not yet been through with a smile on his face, and he walked over to me. "Mathew wants to meet you," he said, more excited than I've ever seen him before.
I looked over at Lucien to see surprise on his face. "This is a first," he said, taking in another breath from his cigarette. "You better go."
It wasn't a question then, but I wanted to go anyways. Something told me I needed to. I put out my cigarette in an ash tray on the table and followed Kace down the hallway. Like the rest of the house, it was neat and clean too, but here the walls were covered in photos of smiling people that I didn't know, and artwork from an unknown artist. All of it was so overwhelming happy that I began to feel sad.
Kace opens a door at the end of the hallway and I'm suddenly hit with the air from outside. Inside, the first thing I notice is there's a huge window on one side of the room and its wide open. The wind blows in the small room slow, but with enough strength to make indictable wind chimes sound. Its only when my eyes get adjusted to the strong light of the sun setting that I notice that small boy on the bed.
He stares at me, carefully and afraid. His eyes are a piercing green that look me over and unbury every secret I've ever had, and all I'm able to do is to stare back.
The boy is obviously weak. His body is frail looking and his skin looks pale. He has dark circles under his eyes like I used to see in Kace, but worse, and when he looks at Kace and smiles, it doesn't reach his eyes.
"Mathew, this is Nix," Kace says to him, taking a chair beside is bed and sitting in it. I nod for a greeting, but Mathew doesn't return it; instead he pulls his covers higher up on his chest. When Kace beckons me to sit beside him, I'm hesitant.
When I sit, I take a moment to look around the rest of the room. The walls are plain, but they covered in more artwork like ones in the hallway; all pieces of the outside world. Bottle caps, signs, leaves, anything and everything all glued together in a way that it doesn't seem as random as it sounds. I wonder for a moment if Mathew made them, but then I dismiss it. He probably never gets out of bed.
Beside me on the nightstand is the only picture in the room. In it, is a boy that looks like Mathew, but younger and happier, surrounded by what looks to bed his parents. I pick it up to take a look but I'm quickly caught.
"Don't touch that," Mathew says in a voice that's neither demanding nor upset, only pleading. I quickly put the picture down and put my hands underneath my legs to keep myself from messing with anything else. He turns to Kace, "I thought he would be more normal looking."
It doesn't take long for Kace to laugh and left out of joke that I don't quite understand. "I think you have to be normal yourself before you meet anyone like that," Kace answers and smiles up at me, reassuringly. "He's nice enough once you get to know him."
They then go into a conversation that I'm not included in, but I don't mind. If anything, I'm happy that I don't have to say anything. Being around Mathew feels like being around a triggered bomb. Kace does his best to make me talk though, asking me to tell Mathew about my job or what schools like. I figure out then that Mathew is only a year or so older than me.
After a while, there's a knock on the door and Lucien walks in. "Kace, you better get home or your parents will worry," he says and Kace smiles sadly.
"I'll come and visit you again soon, okay?" Kace says to Mathew, standing up. I follow his lead and do the same as they say their goodbyes, and Lucien walks around them to shut the window. The room then is suddenly dark, and everything seems much grimmer than before, but it's only now that Mathew really smiles.
Before we get out the door, Kace and Lucien embrace tightly, but it doesn't bother me now that I know how important these people are to him. "It was nice meeting you," Lucien says to me, and I say the same back, honestly meaning it.
The ride home is much more silent then on the way there, but a different kind of silence. Kace's excitement is gone, but it's replaced with some kind of happiness that I don't understand completely, and I realize something that doesn't make sense to me. "Why doesn't Mathew live with his parents?" I ask him.
"They didn't know what to do with him," Kace answers honestly. "He's a lot like me, but worse. I guess after a while they just stopped seeing how hurt he was, and only saw how broken his is."
The thought of it makes me sad for him, but Kace still smiles. "He's a lot like us you know," he adds. "Lucien and Mathew, they almost have the same thing we do. They depend on each other because they have nothing left."