After that text, I simply moved on. Well, not so simply. It was fucking hard. My dreams were haunted by memories of Easton. I swear I'd see someone who looked like him every time I left my house.
I was also borderline homeless.
The Birth Vessel skipped out on us shortly after Easton ghosted me. Seemed like my life was a series of one bad event after the other.
I tried, desperately, to stay for my little sister and brother but my relationship with my father was subpar, at best. And, with my mom gone, our arguments were out of control. I would tell him I didn't want to be there, that I would rather be with the woman who birthed me. He would respond with some nonsense and then call me a 'slut', 'bitch', or both.
Yeah, my father really loved me.
I think I stuck around for 6 months before it became too much for me. I truly tried to stay and suck it up for my siblings, but I never said I was the strong one of us 3. I know my little sister forgives me now, I don't really talk to my brother anymore.
For weeks, I hopped from couch to couch, bed to bed, never really having a home. I'm sure you're thinking that after those weeks, I met PJ and we fell madly in lust and got married. But, no, I didn't meet him for at least a year and a half after that. I was barely 19, attempting to juggle my first job and my first boyfriend…who was not PJ…
After those miserable weeks, I found a place to live…not on my own, of course, but with a family that pretty much made me one of them on sight.
I was content, working nearly every day and spending my rare time with my very toxic boyfriend. His name? Let's call him, Alex. No last name. Better for everyone's sake if he never finds out that I wrote about him. He's a little, uh, scary.
He was really into murder. Which would be fine, since serial killers and crime shows can be rather interesting. But he took it to the extreme. He had it all planned out. How he would go around killing people like Dexter. He planned to live in his rusty van and travel the world, slicing and dicing bad people. At first, he wanted to take me with him. Be the couple who murders together. I played along because I really liked how much he freaked my family out, especially my dad.
One day, however, things got a little out of control. He pulled a knife on the family I was staying with and threatened them. I had to choose: between the people who took me in and the guy who I made myself think I loved (Sensing a theme here?).
Luckily, about a week later, I didn't have to choose. He did it for me. Found some dude in New York to take care of his kinky needs….
Did I mention he was a bi drag queen? No? Well…. I didn't discriminate with who I dated.
Dating that lunatic left a lot of room in my heart for PJ to squirm his way in. He seemed nice and friendly, the opposite of my ex. So, I let him in. That was a mistake. But y'all know that already.
My mind was still a jumble of confused thoughts about a week after my intense interaction with Easton. I tried to move forward and forget about him all over again. I really did.
But my dreams were even more vivid than before and I couldn't shake them.
So, I threw myself into work. I'd pick up shifts for my overnight job and if those weren't available, I'd spend all night in front of my webcam. My regulars were becoming more and more hooked on my sudden sexual energy.
One guy asked me to bend over and shove my thumb in my ass while telling him how much I liked it.
"Yes, Daddy." I cooed. "Feels so good! Wish it were your thumb in me. Mmmm, you should see how wet I am." I pushed my ass and cooch into the camera, which got me a butt load of tips and emojis.
Then, that pesky little reminder of my past joined the chat room.
I held back my glare, still in character.
But he never said anything. He just sat there, staring at me, I'm sure, from behind his computer.
Another command popped on the screen and I shifted from my pose to lay on my back and fondle my tits. "Mm, they're so soft and warm, Daddy." I informed the guy who had made the request.
He sent me a smiley.
Easton still didn't write anything. He sent me a few hearts and $500, though. With the money coming in, I wondered for a moment if I should comment. But I kept my mouth shut.
Then, it all went silent. My camera went black, and my chat session was powered down. I stopped what I was doing and peered at my computer. It wasn't broken or hacked. The web page was up but the chat was down. No reasons, no messages. There was no reason.
A knock sounded on my door and I gulped. Zeke was asleep and I didn't want him to wake up, so I wrapped myself in my robe and quickly went to the door.
Unlocking both the door and the security lock, I opened it slightly, ready to pounce on whoever was there.
But I didn't need to jump anyone. Instead, tears welled in my eyes and I just walked away, letting the person close the door behind them.
"Maxie, I want to explain." he started.
I shook my head. "What is there to say, Easton?" I turned slowly, letting him see me in my weak state. "You chose her. I guess that night was what you needed for you to decide. Glad to know my skills lacked that much."
"That is not true at all, Maxie…and you know it." He came forward and I moved back, wrapping my arms around my waist.
I looked at Zeke on the bed and back at Easton, who followed my eyes. "First, be quiet. If he wakes up, it'll be hell for us both. And second," I sighed. "what is the truth, Easton? Why her?"
He dragged his hand through his hair, a move that made me salivate but I would never tell him that. "The truth? I loved you more than I could handle as a college student. I wanted to take you away with me and never look back. But I knew that I needed to finish school so that I could give you what you deserved."
"What happened?" I whispered, looking at my toes. They needed a coat of paint so badly. But I was too broke to do anything about that. The money I was making was being used toward bills and trying to get the hell out of this place. I needed to save money for a year's worth of rent in a nicer neighborhood.
"My dad got sick." He peered into my eyes, overwhelming with the fact that he could still see into my soul. "I had to take over the business while finishing school and he made it clear to me how important it was that I make the right decisions."
"Elizabeth?"
He nodded. "She was one of them, yes. My mother wasn't happy with that choice. She's the only one who knows about you. Every day, she tells me that I need to find you." A slight smile warms his face.
"So, you found me. What now? Gonna keep me on the side? What about her? What about my son?"
He walks toward me again and I don't move this time. "I don't know, Max. All I know is that I need you right now. Everything else will fall into place."
I let him hold me as I cry into his chest. The familiarity of him something I never thought I would feel again.
He kisses the top of my head. "It just has to." He whispers.