Isabelle
I took a deep breath and let it out as I waited for her to come into the room. I'm not sure exactly what to expect from this interaction. The fact I'm even sitting here right now is still a surprise to me, but I did it. I'm here to face my demons and to get some answers.
"Thank you for your patience Miss Avildsen." Dr. Thomas, an older man, smiled as he led the way into the room.
There was a woman following behind him, my mother. I had seen pictures of her before, back when I thought she was just a heart broken soul. I haven't dared to look at them since finding out she's the one who cost me my father.
"Lyla, this is your daughter that you've requested to see." Dr. Thomas informed her as she sat down in front of me.
Her face held some wrinkles and her light brown hair was up in a bun. Her cheek bones were still just as prominent as mine were. They're about the only feature I got from her, everything else I got from my father.
"Hello." She forced a smile, I could tell she was trying to be welcoming towards me but there was something in her eyes that felt off.
"Hi." I responded, not sure what else to say.
"I'm so glad you came Isabelle." She continued on. "It feels like it's been a lifetime since I've seen you."
"That it has." I nodded, agreeing with her.
"Dr. Thomas says that things are looking good for me." Her forced smile grew a little wider. "If I can keep it up then maybe I'll be able to get out of here."
I continued to keep my tone pleasant with her. "That's good."
Her smile faded away. "Dr. Thomas says you have some questions for me. I'm more than happy to give you the answers that you seek."
I took in another deep breath as I prepared to get right into my questions. I informed the doctor beforehand that I had some things I needed to get clarification on. He stated that she was aware of everything she's done in the past and is cognitive enough to give me the answers I desire.
"Why did you do what you did?" My voice cracked as the words left my lips. "I heard the truth, I heard you were planning to leave dad and that's why he ended up dead."
She glanced down for a moment, as if she were thinking of how to answer. She then proceeded to look up at me. "There's one thing I've learned from being here, my past is my past but I can only learn from it. I cheated on your father because I didn't want the marriage in the first place. When he left I saw my opportunity to live the life I wanted, it wasn't my fault he couldn't handle it."
I was slightly taken aback by how cold she was about him. From what I had heard they had been so in love with each other. Part of me was still holding on to the hope of that being true after finding out the real cause of my father's death, but here she is making it clear herself that wasn't the case.
"So why marry him?" I continue to push further. "If you didn't want the marriage then why did you go through with it?"
"Because I was pregnant with you." Her eyes looked into mine. "There was no other option at the time. If I wanted to be taken care of, then I had to get married to him. The time apart made me realize I could do things on my own, it wasn't my fault he couldn't handle that I wanted a divorce."
I was silent for a moment, trying to fight back the mix of emotions that her words were making me feel. Part of me felt angry, she practically robbed a man from his life so she could be taken care of. The other part of me felt sorry for my father, I may not have memories of him but he didn't deserve this.
"Okay. What about me then?" My words were slightly shaky as I prepared for her response. "Why did you try to get rid of me?"
She glanced down again as she gathered her thoughts. When her eyes met mine I could see nothing but coldness within them. "Because I never wanted you. You were a result of unprotected sex one time, I didn't want to throw my life away for a child."
I didn't even hold back the look of disgust that took over my face. "Then why reach out now? Why ask me to come here?"
"Because I'm trying to be better." She responded, the coldness in her eyes remained. "The first step was facing my mistakes."
I stood up from the chair I was seated in. "I may be your mistake but coming here was mine. I've heard all I needed to, please never contact me again."
Before her or Dr. Thomas could say anything else I stormed out of the room. As the door shut behind me I could feel the emotions I was holding back coming in full force. Tears had begun to fill my eyes as I exited out of the institution.
I felt like falling to the floor right there, to let it all out as my reality sunk in. I probably would have to if I hadn't seen those icy blue eyes waiting for me down at the bottom of the stairs.
I practically flung myself into Sterling's arms. He wrapped me up tightly, holding me against him. As I looked up at him I expected to see him unhappy that I had kept this from him, but instead those blue orbs were only filled with concern.
"She never wanted me." I rasped between my sobs. "She called me a mistake. None of it was real, everything I had heard about them had been a lie."
He took his thumb and wiped the tears from my cheeks. "She may not have wanted you, but whether she likes it or not you're here. She's missed out on the most amazing person I've ever met and that's a damn shame if you ask me. Even if she feels any remorse at all, she doesn't deserve to get to know you."
I didn't say anything, instead I buried my face against his chest. I could hear the sound of his heartbeat and I focused on it. I could feel myself calming down as I listened to the thumping over and over.
"I'm not going to ask why you didn't tell me." He finally spoke, grabbing my attention. "I refuse to let you be alone tonight. I want you to come home with me, you can vent to me or continue to cry on me if you need to. Regardless, I'm going to be here for you no matter what."
I nodded in response. "Okay."
I wasn't going to protest with him on it, I didn't have the strength mentally or emotionally to put up a fight. Not that I wanted to anyway. Sterling had been my safe place growing up and if he still wanted to be it now, I wasn't going to refuse.