I hastily pulled the adamantite bones out of the ancient crypt and stuffed them into my storage. It wasn't a complete set. But, finding bones made of the stuff hadn't been expected anyway. Behind me, the sounds of destruction were loud, raucous and bloody. Reginax had switched back to dragon form, and the demons were wigging out BIG time. We had tried the peaceful, bargaining approach, but the local demon lord hadn't been interested. Well, not in bargaining, anyway. In jumping the dragon's female form, yes. Reginax had weighed the problem in her head for less than a second, before knocking the lord's head from his shoulders in a bloody squish. Then, all hell broke loose and we were running. Finding the ancient tomb in their caverns, and her smelling the bones was all luck. Or chance. Whatever. Then I was busting open another demon tomb and scooping the dirt out and into a sack, which, when full, I jammed into storage again.
More running. Well, me running. Reginax ga-lumping along behind me, blocking the demons path and occasionally pausing to fry a couple hundred. Amazing. You would have thought they'd learned NOT to stand in front of her maw, when she opened her mouth, but, they just stood there with a frozen, stupid look on their faces as she roasted them alive. Apparently, in this world, lower level demons weren't terribly bright…
Finally back at the mouth of the valley, I mentally signaled the wizard.
*Gargs! Time for Evac!!*
On cue, a swirling portal appeared. I turned to hurry the dragon along and saw she was industriously blocking the valley entrance with boulders and heat welding them together. Shit. The demons weren't coming out of there any time soon. Hope they were homebodys.
"Reg, come on! Portal's open!" I shouted. The dragon turned, nodded and rumbled towards me, regaining human form on the run. Then, we were through and back in the Wizard's lair.
"Excellent! A MOST excellent run!" the little man cackled, as I opened my storage and started unloading product.
"Yeah. If we had banks to rob, or something of that nature, we'd be rich. No one's gonna stop THAT tank…"
The tall, black armor clad woman shrugs and smiled nonchalantly.
"I am good at what I do."
"Will this be enough to make me a new body?" Glenn asked, floating nearby and watching the odd and mostly disgusting assortment of items being laid out upon Gargamel's work bench.
"Oh yes. No question. These are even far higher quality ingredients than the formula called for. This new body of yours will be indestructible and immortal. You may even outlive the dragon!" the wizard chuckled, examining the metallic bones and demonic grave dirt.
"What about my blood?" the dragon queen asked, 'How much will you need?"
"The recipe calls for 4 pints. We'll take 6 just to be safe. You'll be fine. In your dragon form we could probably take several gallons from you…"
She nodded. Glenn, standing nearby, watched in fascination as the wizard prepped equipment and materials to create him an indestructible, immortal body. He looked at me and nodded his head toward the outside. I casually walked to the door and exited the cave-like home of the odd little man. The ghost was right behind me.
"John. Are you sure about this?" he asked hesitantly.
I laughed.
"Shouldn't I be asking YOU that question?"
"I mean, what if something goes wrong? What if I go insane? What if I become evil?"
"Why would you? Stop thinking up nonsensical problems. Even IF such a thing happened, do you REALLY think Reg wouldn't cure it? Or that screwy little Wizard? The only question YOU should be asking yourself, is; Are you prepared for eternity with the woman you love?"
The Hero looked nervous.
"I have been alone SO long. It feels so RIGHT to be by her side again. I am worried. Something will go wrong. Something will separate us again. Something I cannot return from."
"Not gonna happen. Be happy. Enjoy your lives.' I smiled and raised a hand to clasp his shoulder. Totally forgetting he was immaterial, I lost my balance when my hand passed right through him and I tripped over my own feet and hit the ground.
"Oh. Sorry John. Let me give you a hand there…oh."
"NOT funny, Glenn…"
***************************************************************************************************
Reginax had told me to pay attention while I was out walking. I would be having a visitor, and not to fear. I would have asked further, but, just wasn't in the mood to care. The area around Gargamel's lair was swampy, overgrown. It was a forest run amok. I was a mortal man. Well, for the most part. Being transported and revived bodily from another world might make me something other than strictly human. But, I didn't really care. I was alive. That was enough. The trees were green. The sky was blue. The sun was yellow. It might not be earth, but, it certainly didn't seem like too bad a place to be.
"Oi. Human. Hold up there a bit." A voice bellowed from above me. I kinda jumped and spun around to see whom was addressing me. To find a red dragon descending from the sky. Another dragon. Was I attracting them or something?!?! Reginax was Queen of the Black Dragon Flight. She had mentioned there were other Flights (families). And now, I was meeting a red one.
The massive creature settled onto the ground before me and folded its wings.
"Ye are John Saint George, yes?" it asked, closing one eye and squinting at me with the other.
"Yes. I am. And you are?"
"Ach. I am Angelax. Queen of the Red Dragon Flight. Pleased to meet ye."
Another female dragon. Weren't there any male dragons in this world??
"Nice to meet you, Ang." Ugh. Why did it have to be THAT name? My interactions with females of that name NEVER went well. "How may I be of assistance to you?"
"Reginax said you were travelling together with she, and her mate. Said you were instrumental in raising her mate back to life. I found that interesting."
I sat down on the grass, and scooted my butt up against a tree. This apparently was going to be a longer conversation.
"It was only my idea on how to bring him back. Nothing more than a wild stab in the dark, that turned into reality thanks to the Wizard. I don't think I had a very big part in it other than coming up with the basic concept."
"She said you allowed her mate to possess you, so she could… be with him."
I hung my head. Damnit. Dragons had no sense of propriety/modesty.
"… yes. That is true."
"Yet, when she offered to thank you, you politely refused."
"…yes. Again true. If you're going to ask me to explain the morality of my heart, it's going to be a very long and probably boring conversation for you."
The red dragon cocked her head and squinted at me some more.
"Stand ye up and come here for a moment, John Saint George."
I didn't even pause, but did as I was bade. I looked up at her figure. Not quite as big as Reginax, but close.
"Yes?"
"Hold ye still…" so saying, she opened her gaping maw and lowered her head down to me. Suddenly, I was surrounded by teeth more massive than a megalodons, and wrapped up in a tongue bigger than the largest boa constrictor. Her breath was…not unpleasant. And she was mumbling and humming to herself, as she thoroughly...tasted me? It never occurred to me to struggle. And she wasn't making any attempt to eat me. I mean, it would have at least taken some effort to bite through the armor I was wearing, which was made of Reginax' recycled scales.
As quickly as it happened, Angelax withdrew, and I fell down on my ass blinking rapidly. I was covered in dragon saliva. Strangely, it didn't bother me. I actually felt kind of… excited?!?
I coughed and tried to speak. Failed. Tried again and managed…
"W…what…was that…about?!?"
The red dragon looked down on me, an amused expression on her face. I could only tell amusement on a reptilian face, by the time I had spent with Reginax.
"I've haven taken human form in MANY years…. So I wanted to probe yer eeny, weeny brain, before I did, so I could assume a female form you found most pleasing. Give me a moment here…"
Oh no. Not her. Please, for the love of GOD, don't tell me you picked her out of my brain…
The swirling, morphing thing happened, and another 7 foot tall woman stood before me, clad in red armor, coiffed with a long wavy mane of fiery red hair. Her figure, was also… herculean in proportions.
"Well? How did I do? What do ye think, little man?" an Irish accent.
The woman I had loved my entire mortal life on earth. The one who would love ANYONE but me. Her face adorned a comic book warrior Amazonian body.
"Uh…" twitching. Trying not to jump and run. Brain spinning as I tried to think up a non-insulting, not pathetic response. "That particular face… is…well… rather disconcerting to see again." I rose unsteadily to my feet and moved back to my tree, sliding back to the ground against it, and looking bleakly at the female dragon.
She raised an eyebrow.
"Hrm. This face figured very prominently in your head."
"Yeah…I…well, that face was the love of my life. Unrequited, unfortunately."
"oh." FINALLY, the dragon looked uncomfortable. She shuffled armored feet on the ground and moved to sit beside me, against the tree.
"Reginax says you are the 2nd most magnificent male she has ever encountered. I think probably she placed you 2nd, so as not to diminish the man she loves. But, you seem to be at least his equal."
I chuckled. "She has an overinflated opinion of me, because I helped her out a couple times. I do what I do, because I believe in doing right, for the sake of it."
"Indeed. We dragons find that an admirable trait in males. Did Reginax ever explain our mating practices to you?" The redhead asked, slouching over against me.
"…nnno. No, can't say as she did…"
"Male dragons are imbeciles. Little better than unintelligent animals, really.' They canna transform, and they tend to be violent first and think about their actions little to not at all."
"Hrm. Sounds mostly human to me…"
The red dragon/woman let out a barking laugh.
"Nay. They are vile. Which is why the females do not breed with them. Would ye breed with a rabid animal? No. Well, we do not either. But, thankfully, we can transform. So our options are not limited to our own species. But there are still drawbacks. We are immortal, for all intents and purposes. If we do choose to spend our lives with someone, they invariably die well before we would. You humans are gone literally in the blink of an eye to us. Which is why Reginax is so indebted to you and favors you so highly. Not only did you give her back her true love, but, you made him immortal. Even though you yourself desired her, you put her needs before yours. Truly, you are a male, the like of which has not been seen by us in MANY an age."
I shrugged, "Thank you."
"Since ye are of the mind not to co-habitate with a male harem (WHICH many females do. Nothing wrong with it tho, ifin it's not yer thing), Reginax spoke with myself about ye. I am a bit of an odd-ball myself, amongst female dragons. Monogamous, I mean." She stretched casually. Don't look. Don't look. It was difficult to ignore.
"I don't keep a stable. And if I don't get along with someone, I don't stay long. Ne'er had any children to date. Can't really say I long for em. But, bein alone ain't s'nice either iffin ya know what I'm sayin."
"So…" I asked hesitantly "Reginax asked you to come to me as a Blind Date?"
Angelax cocked her head to the side and frowned.
"I dinna get the reference…"
I explained. It took a bit. Never thought translating a term would be so difficult.
*laughing*
"Blind Date. An amusing term for it…"
I smiled ruefully.
"Well, iffin that is what ye wish to call it, sure n well it is. Although the connotation there is more a social one, I am thinking, then a sexual one. Make no mistake, Saint George. I have decided I am attracted to you. So, my end game is to bed ye. " The look on her face was… hungry? Predatory. Definitely sexy.
"…I…am flattered, Miss. Could we get to know each other a bit better? For me, a lot of the love in a relationship comes from learning about the other person. " I said quietly, meeting her gaze.
"ACH! My fault… when I probed yer mind before turning human, I dinna SHARE. Well, let's just fix that right now, shall we?" And so saying, she reached over and drew me in for a kiss. And just like that I was inside her mind and saw her life. Thousands of years worth. Older by far than Reginax. The oldest dragon, and the oldest living being, in fact. And the most powerful. And the wisest. Well, so said the others of her kind. Reginax KNEW I would appeal to her. She hadn't taken a mate in eons. TENS of thousands of years. Through her eyes I watched civilizations rise and fall. I watched wars. I watched young dragons be born. Grown up. Grow old. And end their own lives of their own accord. Except for her. She remained. And watched over. I watched her lovers, few though they had been, grow old and pass. I felt small. My sadness and sorrows seems infinitesimal, in comparison to a life so long.
Everything was dark. I think I must have fainted. Cruddy pansy thing for a 50 year old man to do, at being kissed by a beautiful woman. Even if she WAS a dragon.
*********************************************************************************************
"What exactly did you DO, to him?" Gargamel asked calmly, checking the unconscious man's pulse. "Heartbeat rapid. Thready. Seems like massive shock."
"I…I shared my life-memory with him. Usually, only a few hundred year of it, is all they are able t'read. The mortal mind can't seem t'handle more than that. He… he read ALL of it!"
Reginax sat forward and stared at John Saint George. "ALL?"
"Yes. To my beginning. Not even another dragon has done that. And it was …instantaneous. Wha'ever he is, he is NOT a mortal. Does he hae magics? Has he not used any special powers around ye?" Angelax asked, holding the unconscious mans hand and gently squeezing.
"No. He seemed distinctly…ordinary in that way. He can talk to wolves… they vested their power into him. But, no super strength. No special battle prowess or anything like it. Just a genuinely GOOD man."
The little wizard cackled and moved to John's beside.
"Stand back ladies. This will wake him up. But you're going to want to cover your noses. It really reeks!"
So saying, he shoved a small bottle under the man's nose and quickly uncorked it.
**************************************************************************************
I awoke to a smell….well, like a skunk had crawled up another skunk's ass, and died. It was heinous. I wanted to vomit.
Sitting up, I glared around the dark chamber. Gargamel. Reginax. And….a very concerned redhead, holding my hand. I smiled at her. Everything seems to fade into the background, but her face.
"Sorry about that. Wasn't expecting it."
"Neither was I!! What are ye, John Saint George? I am the eldest living thing on this world. No one has ever shared my entire life's story. Not once in all these eons. Yer brain should be a melted pile o 'puddin in yer skull!"
I shrugged and smiled.
"I am me. That's all I know. Well, that and how great YOU are. That I know now VERY well." I squeezed her hand in mine. Her face turned bright red.
"Oi now. No embarrassing me."
"Your fault. You showed me." I grinned.
Behind Angelax, the little wizard was nodding sagely. He turned to the black dragon and spoke quietly. "Your matchmaking skills seem to be stellar. Hook me up!"
Reginax snorted.
"I am a dragon queen. Not a miracle worker."
I burst out laughing.