Wendy felt numb as people bustled around her, the world around her seemed to move at a completely different pace from her. She felt out of place, how was she supposed to carry on with her life at this moment when nothing felt right, she looked to her giggling and beautiful sisters, they had asked her time and again this early morning if something was wrong and she had managed to quiet their concerns with promises that it was simply nerves and a restless night of sleep. She hadn't decided if she would tell them, her knuckles turned white around the flowers that had been given to her, she wasn't even sure if she would tell the man who was about to be her husband the truth. Wendy knew she wouldn't or more simply that she couldn't, she could not tell him that a match already so decidedly below his own station was even worse off than he knew.
"That's quite enough self-pitying, Wendy" Bianca's voice forced her from her dazed stare as she turned to look at her "What's done is done and there is no backing out now, you will walk in and marry the Duke and nothing will be done to stop that from taking place. For once in your life you will be good for something." Her words were punctuated by the painful grip on Wendy's upper arm, her nails digging deeply into Wendy's skin.
Wendy couldn't help but stare silently at the woman she had always thought to be her mother, she had never wondered why she didn't look like her, but she had often cried in confusion at the lack of love her mother so obviously had for her. She used to strive and work for the perfection that was asked of her until she realized it was unobtainable to her. "Do you love me?" The words were out of her mouth before she could even think to stop them, Bianca turning her head sharply to look at her "Do you love me, mother? despite all that we have been through, the ways I know I have disappointed you, the shame I'm sure you've felt of me, I know in my heart I will love you if you gave me even the smallest sign that it would be welcomed." Wendy couldn't help the tears that welled in her eyes. She guessed some feelings didn't die as much as you tried to bury them.
Bianca looked for what seemed like forever at the young woman, the same blue eyes as her mother staring at her. She remembered then the first time she had seen her, crying in the arms of her mother, a foolish maid who thought to steal her husband out from under her, she had reached for the babe, she had looked so much like her husband there was no denying her parentage, the maid cried as she begged for her child back. Her husband had made it clear he would keep the bastard, even if it was just to spite Bianca, but she would be damned if she would be humiliated that way. She had worked too hard to climb the social ladder, had given up too much to go from the daughter of a tradesmen to the Countess she was, and she knew what she had to do, she had been in hiding from society as soon as she learned of the pregnancy, she would re-emerge with the child, claiming it as her own to appease her husband's wants, and the babes mother would be sent away, she cared little what happened to her, as long as she never saw her again.
"You have been nothing but an unfortunate situation in my life since the moment you were born, Wendy" her voice sounded as cold as if she was stating a simple fact "And I have never felt an ounce of love for you, nor could I ever be prevailed upon to do so."
She turned sharply and left the room as Wendy's father came into the room and stood next to her. Wendy would never seek it again then, the love she wished she could have felt from her. Even if she wasn't from her own womb, Bianca had been the only mother she had ever known and her heart broke with the last bit of hope that she would one day love her being dashed to pieces.
"Let's get this over with" Her father appeared bored as he held his arm out for her to take and as she placed her trembling hand on top of his sleeve, the doors to the church were pulled open. Inside the church there were not many people, definitely not as many as she expected there to be and relief flooded her momentarily. She didn't know how she was supposed to marry a total stranger in front of so many eyes, indeed only a few of her father's longstanding and quickly dwindling business partners, Bianca, and her sisters sat on the bride's side of the church. When her eyes drifted over to the other side she was met with mainly strangers, though she did see Lord and Lady Baxter standing at near the front, Grace smiling as she held a lace handkerchief to her welling grey eyes.
Wendy failed to see why her sisters and the Duke's sister were so pleased with this union, could they not tell that she would fail in every way imaginable and lead the Duke into a life where he felt only resentment for having helped her and unhappiness in his own marriage. She felt her lips twist as she dropped her gaze to the floor, this "fate" Penelope spoke of that controlled the course of our lives had a horrid sense of humor, and it seemed to care little of whose life it ruined at the expense of its joke.
She forced her dry throat to swallow as the shining black Wellington boots of the man whose life had been ruined by this joke came into her vision, she knew she would have to look up at him now, have to face him, she wished there was some way she could have solved this for him, a way in which he didn't have to be tied in marriage to her for the rest of his life.
When their eyes finally met Wendy felt as if she couldn't breathe again, it had only been but a few weeks since she'd last seen him but she had dimmed his appearance in her mind, for he was surely the most handsome man she'd ever laid eyes on. He stood tall and proud, knowing of his worth, and yet his inhumanely silver, grey eyes told of his humanity, of his willingness to be humbled when the occasion called for it. All accounts she had heard of him, or that she had charged Sarah with finding out about him, was that he was a kind Master and Landlord, He was smart in his finances and never one to be tied up in scandal of mistresses or gambling.
"Who gives this bride away?" The clergyman's old voice rang out in the church.
"I do" Her father said simply as he dropped her arm and left her side, she faltered for a moment before she walked forward feeling like her feet were being weighed down until suddenly she was standing side by side with the Duke as they faced the clergyman.
The words roamed around Wendy, never settling in her brain as she made promises of commitment and assumed the Duke did the same, as they turned to each other he grabbed her left hand, his warm fingers wrapping lightly around her wrist and settling on the beating pulse as he slipped a ring onto her finger, the cold metal providing the shock that forced her mind back to the present, Wendy looked down, she saw a beautiful ring, a deep red oval ruby sat in the middle of small diamonds surrounding it, all sitting on a silver band. She numbly slipped a silver band unto his ring finger, a much smaller red stone nestled in the middle of the thick band.
"By the power vested in me by the church and our almighty Father, I now pronounce you Man and Wife." The old voice finalized at the end of the ceremony and the small congregation moved to clap in celebration. Wendy stalled, was she to kiss him now? Did they shake hands and part ways? This was no love match, no match brought about by fondness, it was closer to a business arrangement than it was any matter of the heart.
Rhys could not stop himself, seeing her walk into the church he was stunned by her beauty. Her freckles almost hidden by the lovely blush staining her cheeks, her eyes shined a radiant blue and though he could see the worry in them he found he could think of nothing but her beauty, her rich, brown hair pinned up curls escaping that framed her face, her curves filled the soft, white fabrics of the dress and his hands twitched with the urge to settle on her waist. She was more beautiful than any woman he had ever beheld in his life and his heart pounded against his chest as he drew her body to his and indulged in the feeling of her full, sweet lips against his.
The softness of her body dipped into the hardness of his own and a groan of longing bubbled up his throat, he would never force himself on her, wife or not, she would have to come to him willingly for the marriage to be consummated. He pulled back after only a tormentingly brief moment of their lips being joined and tucked her hand into his elbow as he walked her back down the aisle and into the carriage bound for his estate.