Last night, I didn't intend to make Rura angry. After she kicked me out of her room, I walked a little down the hall and waited, just to hear...nothing. I thought she'd maybe cry, or break things and throw a fit. Maybe even take some time to wander around the mansion. Instead, I heard the muffled thump of her thumping on the bed.
Then this morning. She awoke earlier than I anticipated and just...left. She didn't speak a word to anybody, didn't ask me if she could go anywhere, didn't take a guard, and just left.
My fist comes down hard on my desk remembering. How dare she not even greet me? Where is her respect? Manners? Does she have no care in the world about trying to please me? Doesn't she know I could make her life hell if I wanted too?
If you ever even tried I'd shift and ram us into the nearest tree while Rura and her wolf beats the shit out of us.
Ace's painted picture gives me pause and makes me laugh a little. I don't imagine her trying to tear us apart like she'd probably like to do right now, but I imagine Ace making an entire fool out of the both of us and Rura and her wolf playfully running up behind us to bat at us with her paws. I imagine a situation where we're both happy and can argue but still get along.
How will we ever get to that point though? Rura's words keep replaying in my mind. Worthless? A whore? A slave? That's how she thinks I view her? She thinks my respect for her is that low?
Well if this had happened to you, would you think any differently than our Mate?
"Listen here asshole. I get it, you're angry, you don't like me right now. You disagree with my decision. But can you brighten the fuck up?" I say to Ace. He's been a Debby Downer for far too long and it's starting to grate on my nerves.
Ace snarls in my mind. Angry? I'm furious! He roars.
You're throwing a temper tantrum like a child because she won't show you any respect, but what respect have you earned? At least your Mate acknowledges you in some way! Mine won't give me the time of day to try to explain, let alone look at me! I'd rather face my Mates' fury than her silence. You made these idiotic mistakes, not me, and yet I'm the one being punished. I have to suffer. Because. Of. You.
And with that Ace cuts me off, stopping me from replying. Once again he gives me pause. I'm used to being respected automatically because of who I am. Because of the power that I hold. I do feel some type of way that Rura doesn't seem to respect me, but it's like Ace said, what did I do to gain her respect?
I'm so focused on myself that I barely acknowledge the pain my wolf is feeling. I'm so focused on myself that I refuse to try and play nice with my Mate.
I meant what I said about getting married to Rura. I don't want to wait. We'll be married the day after her 18th birthday, which means we'll be married in two weeks.
Rura is going to have to attend some meetings with me soon and meet some of our people. Packs from all over the world will be coming to attend our wedding, so I must get her used to our people as soon as possible and make them understand that she is to be their Queen, their ruler, and treated with the utmost respect or face my wrath.
I can only hope that I start to build a relationship with Rura in the meantime and try to keep my temper under control. It's hard being a ruler as it is, and it's hard being an Alpha. Alpha's are already territorial and quick tempered, so try being the natural born Alpha King.
I scrub my hands over my face, trying to expel my stress on my exhale. When Rura gets back, I need to speak with her. I need to stop letting my worries and fears get in the way and I need to open up to her.
I have to tell her why I need her so much. Not just because of the council, not just because of the deadline. Not just for the throne and the people, but for me. I need her. Me. The man and the wolf. Without her we'll fade away into nothing but rage and madness. Without her our people have no hope. Because without her, there will be no more King, and these lands will fall to ruin.