We found a table with two wrought iron chairs in the atrium and sat down. Just having Wam here gave me some relief to my anxiety, but I still felt so overwhelmed by Kedron's condition. Even with everything on my mind, the colors of the vegetation within the atrium were impossible to ignore. Throughout my childhood, Mom had always adored flowering plants.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw movement and turned to look at Wam. As he took a drink of his vending machine coffee, a Monarch butterfly came to rest on the top of his head. I continued to watch the butterfly as it moved its wings gracefully, back and forth. Wam looked up at me from his coffee, turned his head slightly to the side and said, "what is it?"
I pointed my cell phone in his direction, snapped a picture, and then turned the camera so he could see the picture. The butterfly chose that moment to leave Wam's head and flew over to a beautiful butterfly bush not far from our table. It wasn't until that point I saw other types of butterflies flitting and fluttering amongst the plants, trees, and bushes.
Wam smiled at me, "I was wondering what had caused the look of amazement on your face. Now I understand. Is it still there?"
When I shook my head, he ran his hand over the top of his head. I took that moment to take a drink of my second coffee of the day, compliments of Wam and the ICU vending machine. Wam studied me, "Are you able to stay with Kedron to give him strength, or do you have somewhere to be this week?"
"Honestly, it wouldn't matter if I had plans or not. I don't think I could bring myself to return home and leave him here. I know if the roles were reversed, Kedron would be there for me too."
Wam reached over and took my empty hand in his. "The bond you have with your brother is truly remarkable. I don't blame you a bit for wanting to be here." He reached into his pants pocket with his other hand and pulled out a key fob. He placed it in the hand he held, let go, and explained, "as long as you stay in my cabin, I want you to use this car as if it were your own."
I immediately began to shake my head and set the key fob on the table so fast you'd have thought it was a hot coal. "No Wam, I can't."
"you can't what Kynlee? Drive?" He asked.
"I can drive, but I cannot accept this from you. You've done more than enough already." I couldn't help but feel guilty. I knew Wam was being nice. Taking advantage of his kindness would make my life easier, but it just wasn't how I was raised.
"How many times do I have to explain? You'll need the car to care for the house, as well as to get to and from the hospital. The car just sits there, unused right now. It's actually better for the car to be driven every so often. Think of it as doing me a favor if it makes you feel better."
I couldn't help but sigh in response to his flawed logic. "I'm not gonna win am I?" I couldn't help but smile slightly as I asked.
Wam smiled in return as he answered, "probably not. One thing you can trust though, is that I will always have your best interest at heart. Like I told you, if my authoritative attitude is too much, just tell me."
I simply nod and take another sip of my sad attempt at caffeinated goodness, but caffeine that I needed badly all the same. "I have to be honest here Wam."
He picks up his own cup and takes a long drink as he continues to study me. Wam nods while he leans back in his wrought iron chair, settling in to listen to what I had to say.
I took a deep calming breath to attempt to ease my tight chest, before continuing, "I am very worried about Kedron. I understand his condition is serious, and I'm terrified I may lose him to this damn pneumonia. I don't have the energy to argue with you and need to focus on his recovery right now."
I sat back in my chair, looking away from Wam and at the bush with the beautiful butterflies flitting to and fro. "I want you to know Dr. Wam Teton, no one other than our parents has ever stepped up for us, or for me." I could feel my eyes burning and my chest becoming tight again, so took a cleansing breath before continuing. I refused to let Wam think I was nothing more than an immature cry baby. The only thing worse would be if he thought I was trying to take advantage of his generosity. A young, emotional, gold digger was about as bad as it got in my book. "Like I said before, I appreciate what you are doing for me, but I'm just not used to it. What little time I've spent with you, I've gotten the impression that you are not only intelligent and successful, but trustworthy. Great qualities in a doctor and a part-time roommate. I want to reassure you Wam that I am not trying to take advantage of you. I will do everything in my power to pay you back every cent." I looked up as I finished talking and met his eyes so he could see that I was sincere.
"Kynlee, if I thought you were a gold digger or just after me for my body, I would have never offered."
I had looked down at my coffee cup but when he said the part about being "just after me for my body," my eyes shot back up to his and suddenly my face felt hot. I just stared at him with my eyebrows raised, my eyes wide, and likely my face the color of a tomato.
Wam began to laugh, "relax Kynlee. I'm simply making a point. I do not believe you have ulterior motives, and I know without a doubt you are not trying to take advantage of me or my help. I'm sorry. I was trying to shock you to get your attention, but I had no idea you would be so embarrassed. Please forgive me." Wam had a sheepish look on his face, but I thought I maybe saw a bit of mischief yet in his eyes. If I didn't know better, I'd think he was flirting with me. That was impossible though. He's a world renowned doctor, about ten years my senior, appeared to be set with money, and seemed to catch the eye of every female in whatever room he happened to be in. There is no way he would be interested in someone young, inexperienced, without a college education, and without any sexual experience. It was no secret he had Dr. Adams's attention every time he walked in the room. No way could I compete with a blond bombshell who was a physician, was likely well off in the financial department, and was extremely intelligent. No doubt she was closer to his age and had more sexual experience than I'd probably ever have.
I overheard a couple of the nurses talking the other evening at the Nurse's station, which happens to be near Kedron's bedroom. They were discussing which doctors and nurses were known for having active sex lives and how they hopped from one bed to the other depending on who was willing and available. To my surprise, they had talked about Dr. Teton being a real catch but that they were unaware of him spending time with any of those doctors or nurses. They did say they'd seen Dr. Adams coming onto him, but he always responded professionally and turned her down.
"Can I ask you a question?"
Wam replied, "I think you just did," and he began to laugh.
I tilted my head to the side and gave him my best, 'really?' expression.
"You can ask me anything Kynlee. What do you want to know?" Wam took the last drink of his now tepid coffee and studied me again as he waited for my question.
"Okay... I was wondering why you're not married?" I blushed as I finished the question. I just couldn't help that he had that effect on me.
"Who told you I wasn't married? I am married..."
"Oh gosh, I'm so sorry. You don't wear a ring, never mentioned a wife when you talked about sharing a house, and.." but I didn't get to finish because Wam cut off my rambling.
"I am married.... to my job," Wam smiled again at my embarrassment.
"Oh," I said. Unable to say anymore.
"When I finished medical school and then my residency, my goal was to learn as much as I could and become the best neurologist possible. Of course there is additional experience needed to become a specialist, so I've basically spent every extra moment I've had since I graduated high school, going to college, learning to become a doctor, then becoming a neurosurgeon. Didn't leave much time to devote to dating, let alone marriage or a family." Wam gave a sad smile this time, like he just now realized everything he had given up to become the doctor he was.
"I would imagine you were busy. I'm sure you've given up a lot to become one of the best neurosurgeons in the world. I for one am thankful for your sacrifices. Without your expertise and kind heart, I'm not sure where I'd be now.... so thank you Dr. Teton." I gave him a teasing smile as his mouth drew into a firm line. I could see he was about to chastise me for calling him Dr. Teton again until I started to laugh.
"Why Ms. Knutson, are you teasing me? That smile looks good on you."
That was not the response I was expecting, but I'd take it.
"As much as I hate it, I have to head back to Red Wing tonight. I would like to take you to the store to get some clothes, then drop you at the house so you can bring the car back. Sound like a plan?" He raised his eyebrows in anticipation of my answer.
I started to tell him it wasn't necessary, but judging by his expression, I knew I wasn't going to win and nodded. I did need clothes, and the money from the grant had not come through yet. If it made him happy, I'd let Wam do this one last thing for me before I put my foot down. "How soon do you want to go?" I asked, suddenly feeling nervous about being alone again with Wam outside the hospital.
"Why don't we go check on Kedron, from there, we will make a quick trip to the store, the cabin, and then you will have the car and can return as soon as you are up to it."
I stood, threw my now empty coffee cup and Wam's in the garbage, and pushed my chair in. "That sounds like a plan my man." It then hit me what I had said, and a hand flew up to cover my mouth. Apparently I was becoming too comfortable with Wam. Last time we were alone I kissed him on the cheek. Now I called him 'my man'? I needed to keep my guard up so I didn't continue to embarrass myself. "I'm so sorry. That was inappropriate. Please forgive me."
"Kynlee, it's good to see you let your guard down a bit. It's fine. I couldn't be lucky enough to belong to a girl like you. Shall we?" Wam waved his arm toward the entrance, motioning for me to go first.