My phone was already telling me it was 12 am in the morning but I couldn't sleep yet. I didn't want to leave all of this work alone. Part of me wanted to just sleep after this smoke, but I know that it wouldn't leave me alone. These novels usually take a while for me to edit because there's nothing that actually interests me. Most of the time people just follow the same formula without actually understanding what makes them great.
See how the klutzy archetype can be expanded with different styles of executions just being wasted by being called a trope. Or how the shy quiet one will always just be a shy one because she's shy. So much wasted potential on characters that infinitely deserve to be fleshed out but instead are seen as objects of humiliation for the main character.
Weirdly enough the one character that I do relate with in this trash series would be the self aware girl that the protagonist is pursuing. She knows that if she goes with him then she'll lose part of herself. It beautifully shows that all loves have thorns, no matter how perfect it is on paper.
Sadly she's the most unliked girl in the series because she's the only one that refuses to follow the protagonists shenanigans. Instead, all of Morris' viewers want to see more of the raunchy scenes that make your heart warm for a split second only for it to fall comedically flat on its face. In the end, the real girl is ignored because she's too realistic.
I puffed another out to the window of my room, there was no way that I was going to be ignored for being realistic. I want to be the one that steals the show and be the best girl of the show. Just like the girl in the story, I'll be someone that'll ignore everyone who'll pursue me, even if it means abandoning the notion of falling in love.
Looking around my small room, there were just too many scattered pieces of paper everywhere. Too many things that were left undone because I just didn't have the time. Or maybe the proper phrase would be because I was scared of what would happen if I showed it to the world. I'm scared of being rejected. I'm scared that if I did my best and poured my heart into it, it would still be rejected. That's why I prefer editing. Hurting the hearts of others would be easier for me than someone actually hurting me.
Music sheets that I promised myself I'd memorize, works in progress that haven't been updated in forever, and art pieces that haven't even reached the halfway sketches. I really am some kind of monster that never finishes anything.
The door made a knocking sound, as I looked at it the door opened up. A boy came into my room that appeared around the same age as me. Though his face looked a bit embarrassed as he entered in, this wasn't his first time in here. He held his nose as the smell of smoke filled him up.
This was Josh, he was the son of the family I was staying with. He had some kind of strange flat hair that the anime protagonist would be modeled after. However, unlike most protagonists Josh was blonde instead of dark. He was about a couple of years younger than me but already taller than me.
Josh: Mako, dinner is ready.
Mako: Thanks, you can leave now.
Josh: Mom and Dad aren't here tonight…
Mako: Oh.
Josh: Could we do it again?
Mako: You sure won't cry this time? Last time we did it, you were clearly trying your best. Sadly, it's just not good enough for me.
Josh: Please! I only want you!
Mako: Only me? Don't you have other people to do it with you?
Josh: They're not as good as you! I want you!
Mako: Geez, you're such a noisy kid. Let me just change into something comfortable then. I'll wait by your room just like last time.
Josh: Thanks! You're the best!
This was our little secret. Each time his parents weren't home, I'd sneak into his room. This started happening after I discovered his past time. Though it was more of an accident. After slipping out of my school uniform then into my pajamas, I headed right to his room. I brought my things like tissues with me too because I knew it was going to get messy.
As I opened up the door, he had too many dirty clothes around the place making it stink. I forget that this kid forgets to clean up after himself. Josh looked at me hungered. This time he was ready compared to previous times. He shoved everything at me nervously. Quite excited unlike last time. I took the laptop from him and sighed.
Josh was a visual novel maker! A degenerate that wants to make money! Though compared to Morris, Josh prefers to write about fantasy stuff. It's certainly something that I could wrap my time around if it weren't for the fact that the stuff he writes is just surface level!
Josh: Here it is! I've made sure that I made it clearer than the last time!
He pressed up next to me with his laptop like some kind of excited dog, I recoiled away from him because of how close he was getting. Though I did welcome that kind of enthusiasm. It's a lot better than those who write a bunch of shit just for the sake of people liking it. Some low tier shit. However, Josh's work just isn't that good.
Mako: Don't fucking cry next time. Geez, you made it seem like it was going to be the end of the world last time.
Josh: That's because you say a lot of mean things! It just hurts a lot whenever you straight up tell it to my face with facts too! You just don't like sugar coating things do you.
Mako: Irrelevant information. I hope that you have my money?
Josh: Yes! Of course! I've already transferred the money to your bank account so it should be there right now. So tell me what you think! I'm pretty sure you're going to love this one!
Mako: I'll be the judge of that. And don't say that creepy shit. I'm already swamped with work right now but I can't say no to money.
Josh: Take your time!
Reading through these starting pages had already gotten my attention but in a bad way. What makes fantasy the powerful genre is its ability to take the strange and make it interesting. Putting it into perspective, no one in real life would actually want to live in the middle ages or medieval times with magic. No internet to help grind stats, no proper medicine to mend deadly wounds, and magic is only for the extremely talented or lucky. Those are just the base concerns but there's definitely more that like monsters and such. Yet the genre managed to convince the world that living in a world like that would be fun.
However, the fantasy genre could also be easily torn down to clichés and obvious plot flaws that people can see. That doesn't even begin to consider the power scaling issue in modern stories! Being able to execute fantasy is truly something someone has to strive or be drowned in a torrent of similar generic stories. It's hard to stand on your own in the fantasy market.
Mako: It's fucking sucks.
Josh: What!? You barely even read it!
Mako: Yeah, you already made me bored. It's a good thing that I'm talking straight to your face too. If I was your actual editor, I'd be extremely annoyed that I have to read every single page and passage of this garbage!
Josh: Hey… It's not that bad. I put a lot of work into it too...
Mako: But it is that bad. The story is generic, it follows a simple quest that wants to be expanded. It's almost like you don't have a fucking clue yet to what you want to do in the story. So you're just clouding the reader by saying the character has to do this vague questline like save a monarch or slay the demon king.
Josh: But you haven't even finished reading! It gets better later on I promise!
Mako: Y'know what I fucking hate! Is when authors like you use that excuse of it getting better in the series. How are you supposed to be able to find loyal readers if your hook to catch them is too weak. If they read this, they'll just think it's a generic piece of rubbish. There's nothing actually to be invested about!
Josh: But I'm sure they'll be rewarded if they'll stay!
Mako: How could you be certain? How are you sure that they'll be rewarded? You won't! Be fucking realistic, Josh. It's better to just have a better idea from the start and give the reader something to look forward to than just letting the motions be. That way it makes the story become a lot more solid.
Josh: There's more isn't there?
Mako: Also I don't like how your characters are bland from the start! What are these characters even supposed to be? They feel absolutely useless to the story! You could write them out and it'll be the same story. They're just praise machines!
Josh: Oh the girl healer is supposed to be smart, assertive, and always supporting the main male lead. I want her to be well likable for the female and male viewers alike. She's going to be our poster girl and -
I slammed my hand on the door behind me because he was starting to piss me off. Josh accidentally tripped back to his bed, cowering in fear. Looking through the pages again, there was nothing that kept me interested. Even the characters themselves were just formulas from other novels! Nothing original! Almost like Josh was scared to put an ounce of his personality because it's not deemed fantasy or if it didn't follow everything mainstream.
Mako: So I was right. She's just the eye candy. But you're just disguising it by giving her empowerment traits that you've read off an article or video.
Josh: That's not what I meant at all!
Mako: Then explain further.
Josh: She's the main romance point too of course. She'll have development and everything!
Mako: I've scanned over your first three chapters of your novel and all she does is make cute noises or give praises to the main character's superb abilities. Then she's also the damsel in distress you meet first in the story and other than that she won't be given any development…
Josh: I'm sorry…
Mako: Listen, kid. You can have those things but you have to make sure your characters are fleshed out for the right reasons. You're just putting these things here because you learned it from other tropes. I'm fine with the girl healer aspect because that's just something to a preference but the way you wrote it was degrading and shallow. You're just following what's popular and don't even know why it's popular in the first place. I know these are just fantasy but at least make them a tiny bit realistic.
Josh: How do I even do that when I don't even talk to people?
Mako: Just write them like your male protagonists. Same with the girls, girls that have followed through this line of thinking are quite successful in the genre. Don't overthink it. Write what you want to feel would be a memorable character. Other than that your visual novel could have potential. Also your male side characters are nothing but useless cannon fodder just for the male lead to gain power ups through emotions. That part is pretty stupid.
Josh: Okay...
Eh? He didn't cry this time but he did piss his pants. I facepalmed because I didn't expect that to happen. Josh must've done it unconsciously because he only realized it now. His face turned bright red then reached over a towel quickly!
Josh: I'm sorry! You just scare me so much! I thought for sure you were going to hit me!
Mako: Pathetic...