It was completely against what she has wished and planned on doing, she just hated that she is going to die again without doing anything... what was the meaning of having such confidence and determination when she was just going to repeat the same but now against her will. Why was this happening? Why couldn't she stop herself from moving forward?
Finally, she gives up, taking a deep breath and hating to be this vulnerable once again, with her leg rising up in the air away from the edge, she felt her hands flying sideways just how she did when she first jumped from here. But she just didn't understand why she was struggling through such conflict within her and against her body. When the truth is that she had just started her life with the motive to renew herself.
"Maybe, after all, this is what was written for me…" She says as she felt her body leaning forward away from the edge as her face scrunch with the knowing expression of the pain she would feel again. She was always ready to bear the pain as it was nothing compared to what she had gone through but here she was fearing to fall down and re-live the pain.
She wasn't ready for this, to end herself and so here she was shedding tears non-stop feeling her feet almost leaving the edge.
"NO!"
She frowns when she heard a familiar voice but with her mind hazy, she couldn't comprehend who the person was.
"STOP! I said stop!!" She heard the yelling louder with the person coming close to her. How she wished the person could save her, she could just pray for being saved because she was unable to do so.
She then felt a hard grip on her wrist and the force exerted was much more that she winches in pain feeling her body being jerked away.
She yelps out in her shaky breath clutching hard against the figure who just pulled her away from the edge, she was thankful for the first time to have been saved.
How come she wished to live… she felt it so amusing when she always wished was to disappear from this world.
She felt her head against a broad chest which was heaving up and down so hard and she noted that like her he was also taking deep breaths to calm himself. No wonder she was feeling so suffocated, she felt as if her lungs were burning even when she was trying to take in the air. She never felt breathing so hard and she was scared to stand there once again.
She felt some movement from the person beneath her, she slowly raised her head to face the person to be shocked by the sight beneath her. She gulps still feeling the burning sensation running down her throat along with her saliva. She looks away getting intimidated by the cold glare she was receiving from the person.
"Can you get up?"
She widens her eyes feeling her heart clench in pain at the cold voice which was void of any emotions, how she wished the person before she would at least look at her with concern having found her in such a state. But no, who was she kidding with? She would never receive those emotions from him because he never had emotions- not when it was her.
Only for a person to who he gave his world and the person she wished never existed. With that person around she would never make him hers.
She hurries up to stand on her feet but she groans in pain stumbling down on her butt against the concrete floor. She heard a hiss coming out from him and she looked down on her feet unable to meet his gaze, she was yet not ready to get hurt.
"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!" She flinches shutting her eyes closed looking down at her hands which were balled into a fist clutching her skirt as her eyes swelled up with tears. She didn't utter a word while the figure before her was fuming in anger with his hands placed against his hips, his eyes boring a hole at Yoo Na's head which was hung low.
"I asked you something!!" he yells once again while she looks away with her lips trembling in fear. She knows how he hates when people don't answer him but she doesn't know how she could answer his question, not that she could tell him how she tried to kill herself by jumping down from the rooftop.
But he did witness that and what was the meaning of him questioning her about it.
He scoffs chuckling in disbelief as he walks up to her and leans down on his knees matching her eye level, feeling intimidated by such close proximity, she didn't dare to face him. While he was getting impatient with having to keep up with the silence, he groans grabbing Yoo Na by her chin and forcing her to face him.
She yelps in pain as his hold on her chin was giving her pain with his nails digging into her chin, he was just so rough in handling her. She whimpers finally looking at his eyes which were clearly showing how pissed off he was. But when he saw her red teary eyes something within him stirred and he felt guilty about what he was doing, and the sight of her almost throwing herself off the building made him freeze.
"Why?" He questions, his hold against her chin slowly getting soft but Yoo Na was just so troubled and here she was sobbing her heart out, scared? Hurt? What was she feeling at this moment? She couldn't comprehend her emotions stirring her inside up.
Seeing her cry out loud, he did admit he felt bad. He was not sure why he was getting himself involved in her matter when he should have just left after completing his proposal. But here he was questioning her about her actions which he didn't like by a bit.
He couldn't imagine the guilt of not being able to save her as he watches her body down against the concrete ground lifeless. He could have never forgiven himself but he felt relief that the girl was fine and safe.
"Make sure you never do this again… I won't question if you don't want to tell me." He says now leaving her chin as she sobs continuously. He felt uncomfortable when he had the urge to embrace the girl before him so that he could comfort her, he did feel pity for her.
No one dares to commit suicide when they are happy and less troubled. He felt bad knowing that she must be going through hardship.
Even though he ought to show people his cold and ruthless side, he was just the opposite from the inside. He was so kind and generous to the people who he finds weak and now seeing the girl so vulnerable in front of him triggered his side which he wants to hide from the world. He couldn't stay here for long if he wants not to lose himself.
"Get up and leave." He says standing on his feet, "And do not dare to do this again, you get that?" Yoo Na nods her head still sobbing with her head hung low.
Seeing her still on the floor he couldn't leave as his mind made the worst scenario where she did jump over once he left. He got worried to leave her there alone but it was not how he seemed from out. He had learned to keep his inside and outside as two different façades.
He leans down and grabs her by her shoulder, he pulls her up on her feet but having her winch once again he frowns eyeing her leg, upon sensing the swollen ankle through her socks he sighs in irritation. He drops down to his knees facing away from her.
"Come on, get on my back." He orders her to have her eyes widen and cheeks flushed, soon a shy smile covers her face as she leans against his back with her hands tangled around his neck.
"Done… sir."